TV show quotes
[Twenty-eight days later, Springfield's inhabitants have all succumbed to the zombie cow virus and are eating or infecting everyone else who is not a Muncher.]
A little tip... you might want to wash me before you eat me.
All right!
Yeah, you better!
Thank you.
[Gasps] Bart ate a tainted burger!
I'll bash him with this book!
Dad, No! That's the last book in the world!
Really?
Yes! It's... Oh, go ahead.
To the panic room!
We don't have a panic room!
To the panic room store!
Come with me if you want to live- [is devoured by a mob of zombies]
Another politician who can't keep his promises.
What kind of civilized people eat the body and blood of their savior?! [Camera pans to Reverend Lovejoy nervously fidgeting with his Clerical collar.]
This is the best musical in light years!
Light years measure distance, not time.
You know what I meant.
[Singing]
I just have to warn you, Marge...
My taste for romance is kinda perverse!
I can only make love in the back of a hearse
and I have to be dressed as a Civil War nurse!
And then when I'm finished, I'll go through your purse!
But you could do worse!
I could do worse!
We're proof that you could do worse!
She couldn't possibly do worse!
Shhhhh!
Ye-bonjour!
Homer, there's a moth in my room. Where are you?
Where I should have been all along. In Springfield.
What? Get back to the Eternal City of Lights at once or you're fired!
Oh, I don't think so. You know that woman you've been playing "hide the baguette" with? She's French first lady Carla Bruni. You fire me, and I'll call Nicolas Sarkozy, and he'll be all over you like Truffaut on Hitchcock.
You wouldn't dare!
Oh, wouldn't I? Just listen! [dials other cell phone]
[on phone] Allo, you are getting cozy with Sarkozy.
All right, Homer, you win. Give Marge my best.
I will, but first, I'll be giving her mine.
[about Marge and Ned having an affair] My wife and my worst friend. Could it be?
The most intimate evening we spent this week was when I was ironing your shirts.
Actually, those were Carl's shirts.
I'm not thinking straight, why did I have that wine cooler last month?
We thought you were gonna die.
And then Uncle Kevin would have to raise us.
And his funny friend, David.
Oh I'd put rocks in your pocket and walk you out to sea for before I'd let that happen.
Yay!
You two are going out? I thought I told you the Flanders were coming over for dinner.
I'm having a tea party at Janey's.
And I'm having a stink bomb party at the house next to Janey's... no connection.
Stop dragging me! When I get older I'm gonna drag you around and buy you clothes.
Oh, that's wonderful!
These quotes come from Wikiquote's The Simpsons pages and are available under the Creative Commons Attribution-ShareAlike License.
