Come on, I'll give you a piggyback ride-- Whoops, I mean a veggie-back ride home. Come on.
[Lisa climbs onto Homer's back, and he carries his daughter home]
S7Lisa the Vegetarian
S7Treehouse of Horror VI
[laughs] I've got your doughnut, Lard Lad! And what are you going to do about it?
[The Zip Boys mascots come to life]
OJOld Jewish Man
Fellas! Where are you going at this hour? [their heads, being so huge, fall to the ground under their own weight and they drag them away] Hey! Don't scratch up them heads!
[Seeing a very tall man Chief Wiggum pulls out his gun and shoots him]
Aw, they're not so tough.
Um...Chief, that wasn't a monster. That was the captain of the high school basketball team.
Uh, yeah, well, he was turning into a monster, though.
Wheel him out quietly. It's best the children don't see me. [Lunchlady Doris wheels Martin out, but Skinner's foot is on the sheet. The sheet is pulled off Martin, and the kids scream at his grotesquely frozen corpse] Oh, just get him out of there! [picks up the sheet] Not into the kindergarten! [kindergartners screams are heard]
Bart, don't you realize what this means? The next time we fall asleep, we could die!
AAbe
Eh, welcome to my world! [falls asleep]
HSHomer's Brain
[as he enters the 3rd dimension] Oh, glory of glories. Oh, heavenly testament to the eternal majesty of God's creation.
Holy macaroni!
[Lard Lad's giant donut is in the middle of the Simpsons' living room, along with Homer lying in the center of it. The doorbell rings, and Homer is greeted by the angry face of Lard Lad]
Hello? Yes? Oh...if you're looking for that giant donut, uh..Flanders has it. Just go smash open his house. [Homer closes the door as loud footsteps trail off] He came to life. Good for him. [smashing is heard as the screen shakes, and footsteps are heard hurriedly heading back to the Simpsons home. The doorbell rings, Homer answers and is greeted by the same angrier Lard Lad]
[running in the background] Help me Lord!
I told you, Flanders has it! Or Moe. Go kill Moe.
[Homer drives through an alley of Advertisements. Lardlad Donuts is Homer's Favorite]
Ah, the Miracle Mile, where value wears a neon sombrero and there's not a single Church or Library to offend the Eye. There it is! The chain that put the "fat" in "fat Southern Sheriffs".
S7Attack of the 50 Foot Eyesores
[places a dollar on the counter] I'd like a colossal donut, please. Just like the one on the sign. [Homer is given a regular-sized donut] D'oh! Nuts... That's false advertising!
Sorry, sir. No refunds.
[slowly] I paid for a colossal donut, and I'm gonna get a colossal donut! [walks away]
You don't scare us.
RARadio Announcer
Astronomers from Tacoma to Vladivostok have just reported an ionic disturbance in the vicinity of the Van Allen belt. Scientists are recommending that all necessary precautions be taken.
[scoffs] Eggheads... What do they know?
Homer! Where did you get that?
Get what?
That giant donut.
Well, I acquired it legally. You can be sure of that.
[on TV] Good morning, everybody. Panic is gripping Springfield as giant advertising mascots rampage through the city. Perhaps it's part of some daring new ad campaign, but what new product could justify such carnage? [behind him, a poster of himself comes to life] A cleanser? A fat-free fudge cake that doesn't let you down in the flavor department like so many others? Would... [gets grabbed by his giant doppelganger] D-ooh! Let me go... no! Stop! No!
[A "Technical difficulties" sign appears]
[after Lard Lad continues destroying the town] Don't you ever get tired of being wrong all the time?
[thinks to herself] Sometimes...
These monsters are destroying everything and everyone we hold dear! And you kids should have jackets on.
These quotes come from Wikiquote's The Simpsons pages and are available under the Creative Commons Attribution-ShareAlike License.