How much for your entire collection?
Um, the speed of light expressed in dollars.
[to Smithers] Just give him Faraday's constant.
S24Dark Knight Court
Who could have shoved eggs up our brass?
Egg don't belong in a chicken's eye. It belongs in her pee-poo-birth-hole.
Bart must not be judged by these kids. But by a jury...of kids, mostly these kids...there's only so many kids.
Pass the gravy, Gloria All-Wrong.
S24What Animated Women Want
Listen, we swore we'd never go to sleep angry at each other.
I'm not going to sleep.
Well, you didn't have two beers with your lunch.
Marge, I thought this was an innocuous lunch, but it's become terribly ocuous.
The most romantic part of this was the hold music when I made the reservation.
WWaiter
I hope you are enjoying your sushi.
It's as yummy as your poorly produced local commercial says.
S24Pulpit Friction
Well, I'm not one for taking new jobs on a whim. But as we say in the snow plow business, I'm your astronaut.
Why won't someone blame the children?
MMoe
Bring out your beds. Bring out your beds.
Boy, why are your friends so dirty?
Dunno. Why are your friends such drunks?
Touche.
Hehehe, the brain is so stupid.
[as the frog licks his own eyeball] Ow! He took my contact. [the frog licks his own eyeball again] Ow! Now I got two in own eye.
[Everyone started panicking about frogs.]
MMoe
Remember you said when hell freezes over? I think this is close enough.
LLindsay
Huh, I'm in no position to argue.
These quotes come from Wikiquote's The Simpsons pages and are available under the Creative Commons Attribution-ShareAlike License.