[after seeing a weird church in the devilish cave] No, not Surf n Murf!
S24Black Eyed, Please
I know you feel guilty about about cold-cocking Homer.
Please don't use that word in bed.
I want you to punch me in the eye. If you do, then we're even according to Exodus, Leviticus, and Matthew.
You went and hired a law firm, eh. That's pretty aggressive.
Come on, Homer. I'm insisting on a fisting.
What's this about a fisting?
[Ned comes home and finds his parents and Homer smoking marijuana and watching TV]
Homer, I can't believe you're partaking with my parents.
Yeah, it's medicinal; we had a pain in our neck!
S24Dark Knight Court
How much for your entire collection?
Um, the speed of light expressed in dollars.
[to Smithers] Just give him Faraday's constant.
Who could have shoved eggs up our brass?
Egg don't belong in a chicken's eye. It belongs in her pee-poo-birth-hole.
Bart must not be judged by these kids. But by a jury...of kids, mostly these kids...there's only so many kids.
Pass the gravy, Gloria All-Wrong.
S24What Animated Women Want
Listen, we swore we'd never go to sleep angry at each other.
I'm not going to sleep.
Well, you didn't have two beers with your lunch.
Marge, I thought this was an innocuous lunch, but it's become terribly ocuous.
The most romantic part of this was the hold music when I made the reservation.
WWaiter
I hope you are enjoying your sushi.
It's as yummy as your poorly produced local commercial says.
S24Pulpit Friction
Well, I'm not one for taking new jobs on a whim. But as we say in the snow plow business, I'm your astronaut.
These quotes come from Wikiquote's The Simpsons pages and are available under the Creative Commons Attribution-ShareAlike License.