The Simpsons Season 24 quotes

Helen

Why won't someone blame the children?

Bring out your beds. Bring out your beds.

Homer

Boy, why are your friends so dirty?

Bart

Dunno. Why are your friends such drunks?

Homer

Touche.

Homer

Hehehe, the brain is so stupid.

[as the frog licks his own eyeball] Ow! He took my contact. [the frog licks his own eyeball again] Ow! Now I got two in own eye.

Remember you said when hell freezes over? I think this is close enough.

Huh, I'm in no position to argue.

[strict] Oh, that tears it! No more delays!

Did you ever wonder if hippopotamuses think that rhinos are unicorns?

Homer

My head hairs! I'm bald!

There's sexy bald like...uh...Babar, king of the elephants. I read his books as a kid. He married his cousin Celeste. That was my takeaway.

Martin

Let me go. I have a swim lesson with a gorgeous lifeguard.

Dolph

What gender?

Martin

You're not allowed to ask.

Homer

We don't get together to share our emotions. We get together to escape them!

Carl

Why don't we talk about it over at Moe's?

Homer

It's not even noon.

Carl

Yeah, I got a watch, egghead.

Homer

Sorry, Carl, it's WWII all over again. America kicks Iceland's ass.

Homer

And I'm 69 because people always laugh when you say "69." Hehe, no one knows why.

Homer

[realizes the pop-up ad "Ki-Yah! Karate Monsters"] What the? Change the channel? But I'm watching soft core tennis!