We can't have a space creature living in our house.
S19Treehouse of Horror XVIII
[Marge opens oven.]
Crème brûlée! Crème brûlée! Or, in English: Burnt cream! Burnt cream!
Homie, I made you my killer lasagna.
HSHomer's Brain
It's poisoned! Whatever you do, don't eat it!
[The camera pans down revealing Homer is eating it.]
HSHomer's Brain
Okay, you're already eating it. Just don't finish it!
[Homer finishes the lasagna.]
HSHomer's Brain
Okay, you finished it. But don't ask for--
Seconds, please!
HSHomer's Brain
You moron! Just kill her!
[to brain] I'll kill her after dessert!
All those nights I thought you were out getting drunk, you were out killing people?!
I was out getting drunk, then killing people!
[Homer prepares to assassinate Kent Brockman using a sniper rifle.]
Now all I have to do is think of a clever line before I pull the trigger. [Thinks.] Oh, that’s a perfect one. But I don’t need to say it out loud ‘cause I’m by myself.
[transforms into spaghetti on the "Gluttony" stage] More bread, please.
[in the "Sloth" stage] I thought I was killed by that magic spaghetti. [naps, shreds into pieces on a hammock]
S19Little Orphan Millie
Spider Burps!
Milhouse, what are you doing here? I thought you had a three-0-clock wedgie with Nelson.
I had to reschedule.
[Milhouse's parents are lost at sea.]
Here, Millhouse, why don't you cheer up with a glass of Ocean Spray. [catches himself] Oh boy forget that. How about some Cap'n Crunch? [catches himself] Seven Seas Italian Dressing? Oh no no no. Uhh... Chicken of the Sea tuna? Ahh. Billy Ocean CD? The History of Atlantic Records?
Stop naming things!!!
I want to but I can't.
Then go to Moe's.
Good idea. I'll drown my sorrows in Anchor Steam Beer. [Looks at Milhouse] Oh ho ho I'm sorry. [Covers his mouth and leaves]
Bart, stop talking to yourself. That'll show him. Now, how am I going to find out what color Marge's eyes are?
[Homer is searching for his wedding album]
Where is it? I gotta find out what color Marge's eyes are. Ah! Cha-ching!
[He goes to open the album only to find it has a combination lock, and is shut tight]
Ohh! Oh, Marge darling... What's the combination to our wedding album?
Our anniversary.
[Pauses] D'oh!
S19Husbands and Knives
MMilo
These books are meant to be read and enjoyed, not hoarded and then sold when you get divorced.
We're gonna be rich! We can finally start a family.
We have a family.
A better one!
Alan Moore, you wrote my favourite issues of Radioactive Man!
AMAlan Moore
Oh really? So you liked that I made your favourite superhero a heroin-addicted jazz critic who's not radioactive?
I don't read the words, I just like when he punches people. How do you make his costume stick so close to his muscles?
AMAlan Moore
[groans]
Mr. Moore, will you sign my DVD of Watchmen Babies? Which of the babies is your favourite?
AMAlan Moore
[furiously] You see what those bloody corporations do?! They take your ideas and they suck them! Suck them like leeches until they've gotten every last drop of the marrow from your bones!
ASArt Spiegelman
Hey teacup, why don't you chill out?
AMAlan Moore
[sighs] Very well. [starts reading a Little Lulu book and laughs] "Oh Little Lulu, I love you-lu just the same..." [sighs happily]
These quotes come from Wikiquote's The Simpsons pages and are available under the Creative Commons Attribution-ShareAlike License.