TV show quotes
[Flashback]
Then one day, after a drunken brawl with my da...[flashback to Sean and his father fighting]
Yer just like yer mother; can't take a punch!
Then, as I was picking up my teeth, St. Peter appeared to me. He said, "Sean, ya wanker. Repent of your wicked ways or sod off!" Then he gobbed in my face and turned back into a lightpost.
[to Bart after getting expelled from Springfield Elementary School] Boy, I can't believe you got expelled. Well, don't expect to spend all week lying around on the couch like a bum, 'cause that's my thing!
We're about to play Bingo.
Bingo? Hey that's my favorite game. I just can't remember what you yell when you win.
Bingo.
Bingo? Hey that's my favorite game. I just can't remember what you yell when you win.
[sighs] Why don't you just yell, "Yea! I win!"?
[points] Bingo!
Face it, Bart, Catholics rule! We've got Boston, South America, the good part of Ireland, and we're making serious in-roads in Mozambique, baby!
We believe that God's last prophet, Bart Simpson, preached a message of tolerance and love.
We believe the holy Bartman preached a message of understanding and peace, before he was betrayed by his follower, Milhouse! And pulled apart by snow-mobiles, until he died.
EAT BART'S SHORTS!!!!
COWABUNGA!!!!
[War rages]
All right! I'll let you shoot your gay adult film at my house.
I never said anything about gay.
I thought you guys were the gay mafia.
[Homer is once again hit with the hammers]
Ow!
Homer, is this a snuggle film?
Oh yes. Senora left with a rugged yet sensitive man of science.
[worried] Rugged? Is that the same thing as 'handsome'?
Oh no. Handsome means he looks at himself in the mirror. Rugged means you look at him.
[groans]
Whatever happened to please and thank you?
I think they killed each other. You know, one of those murder-suicide deals.
Lisa, when you've sustained as many blows to the head as I have, consistency becomes a.. something... something.. I love you Bart!
"Stamps rule! I mean, suck!"
[spots at a construction out the window] It's a little too spooky for me! And I don't even like watching counting vampires. Go back to your own country!
[Maggie has chickenpox]
Homer, don't touch her, you've never had chickenpox.
I know, and you did and you're great.
Oh, I'm just saying it's very dangerous if you get it as an adult. It could leave you sterile, down there.
Ugh, you always gotta work blue don't you Marge?
[Homer leaves, but pokes his head through]
You're better than that.
Well, me thinks the lady doth protest too much.
You don't trust me? After I salved every chicken pock on your ungrateful body? How dare you?
[turns red in anger] I'm still waiting for that "no".
Get out of this house!
Gladly! [angrily grabs his suitcase and opens the refrigerator door to packs the food out from the refrigerator, closes his suitcase, leaves the house]
This is all my fault! I planted Mom's bra in Milhouse's parents' bed!
[turns red in anger] Why, you little...! [starts strangling Bart]
Homer, I can save you both. Just let go of the rock!
Homer whimpers in fear
Just do it! Trust me!
Okay.
Homer releases the rock as Marge, with a rope tied to her ankle and the tree, lunges after her son and husband. Homer grabs onto her hair, whilst Bart grabs onto Homer's leg, hanging on for dear life.
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