Now don't you worry, Mrs. Simpson, I-- Uh-oh. We've drawn Judge Snyder.
Is that bad?
Well, he's had it in for me ever since I kinda ran over his dog.
You did?
Well, replace the word "kinda" with the word "repeatedly", and the word "dog" with "son."
S4Marge in Chains
Now Apu, Mrs. Simpson claims that she forgot she was carrying that bottle of [looks at bottle] delicious... bourbon... brownest of the brown liquors... [hugs bottle] so tempting... [puts the bottle to his ear] What's that? You want me to drink you? But I'm in the middle of a trial. Excuse me. [Hutz rushes out of courtroom to call his best friend] Hello, David? I'm really tempted!
Just take it one day at a time, and know that I love you.
I love you too, man.
S4Krusty Gets Kancelled
Every time you watch my show, I will send you $40! [holds up check to audience]
MMan
[quick voice-over] Checks will not be honored.
Hey, Red Hot Chili Peppers, would you guys be interested in a Krusty the Clown comeback special?
FFlea
Sure, if you can get us out of this gig.
No problemo. Hey, Moe! Look over there! [Bart points to a blank wall]
MMoe
What? What am I looking at? I don't see anything. Gonna stop looking now! What, is that it...?
Hey, Moe, can I look too?
MMoe
Sure, but it'll cost you.
My wallet's in the car!
MMoe
[chuckles] He is so stupid. And now back to the wall!
These quotes come from Wikiquote's The Simpsons pages and are available under the Creative Commons Attribution-ShareAlike License.