Red team quotes from Hell's Kitchen

Yes, chef!!!

Blue team, stop what you're doing. Stop what you're doing. Forget it. [crosses over to the red kitchen] Red team?

Yes, chef?

Switch it off. I'm shutting down the kitchen. I'm so pissed off, I'm not prepared to see any more shit food coming out. Shut it down.

After pizza was delivered and his maître d' was assaulted, Chef Ramsay has seen enough.

Red team, shut the place down and clean down, yeah?

Yes, chef.

[crosses over to the blue kitchen] Last table, shut it down. Everything off, yes? Stoves off, turn it off.

Missy.

Yes, chef?

Why are you glazing it with butter and not egg wash?

It was egg wash, sir.

What's that in there?

That's egg.

Egg yolk or egg white?

Egg white?

Oh, no. Have they all been glazed all night with egg white?

Wrong thing evidently.

Oh, no. Why are wellingtons going in now?

We ran out, chef.

You ran out?

Yes.

Oh, fuck me... ladies, I personally don't want to do this anymore. (to Rachel) I'm fed up with your shit, (to Maribel) I'm fed up with your shit. (to Virginia) You've been a fucking letdown the minute you started cooking.

Yes, chef.

Then you LIED to me that the turbot's en route, when she (Sara) hasn't even got it out of the FUCKING fridge! Do you want to continue like this?

No, chef.

Fuck the lot of you, is that clear?

Yes, chef.

Fuck the lot of you!

Yes, chef.

[pounds the counter] You. Come here, you. (to Keith) Fat fuck. (to Tom) Hey, doughnut. Come here, you. Hey, ladies, come here. Let me tell you something, [takes off his apron and throws it at Tom] Here you go. [throws his towel at Tom] Here you go. I've had enough. I've had ENOUGH! I cannot believe you're actually attempting to fucking win a restaurant. Get back in your fucking dorms, and alone. By the time you get back in here, from the blue team, nominate someone that's going tonight. And from the red team, come back with someone that's leaving. NOW GET OUT! OUT! LEAVE THE STOVES!

I don't think we're getting dessert.

Melissa. You're running the appetisers, yes?

Yes.

You're running ahead, and no-one's with you. You're not a team player. Right now, I need some team fucking spirit!

Yes, chef!

Or I'll kick you out, and I'll do the fucking section myself!

Yes, chef!

I know what your game is. You just want to get all the appetisers out.

No chef, I swear to God that's not true.

Look good, [pretends to put makeup on] Oh, fuck me. [pretends to adjust his boobs] Oh, fuck me! Fuck off. Piss off. Fucking bimbo.

We're waiting on you Bonnie! Is that just sliced in half there and put back in the pan?

[points at chicken on the cutting board] This chef?

Oh no, Bonnie, not that. You're fucking here, you stupid cat. D'you know what? Every time I've asked you a sensible question, you give me a dumb blonde answer.

Sorry chef.

Right, let's go back to the beginning shall we?

Yes, chef.

Have you just sliced the chicken in half and stuck it back in the oven?

Yes, chef.

Is it dry?

It doesn't feel dry but I'll start over.

It's fucking lost its texture. Right now, you're all screwing your fucking selves. Is the chicken in for the langoustine?

[points to the same chicken] Yes, chef. Right here.

Fuck me. No that's the main course one.

It's right here.

Listen, Hey, listen, it's not in.

It's not in but I'm putting it in now.

Right so - here we go again - When are you going to fucking shut up? I'VE HAD ENOUGH NOW! Stop lying to me! You're saying yes all the fucking time, yet nothing's DONE! WORK TOGETHER!

Yes, chef!

I'm just getting so fucking wound up. It's not going anywhere. We're not getting anything out. Everything's fucking done, clearly given up, and it's fucking embarrassing.

No, chef!

[returning with a dish] Chef?

Aw, fuck off! Oh, fuck off! [kicks a bin] Fuck off! What did they say?

Chicken being cold, chef.

Ah?

Chicken being cold.

Right, hey, gentlemen. Hey, ladies, yeah, all look good well over. Hey, Barbie! (Bonnie) Do your hair before you come over! Stone-cold chicken, fucking salty fucking garnish, yeah? And fucking - there you go chef, there you go. [drops the dish on the floor] Fucking clear down.

(interview) Chef was furious. He dropped the plate, he said "Fuck off! Shut down!" And we were SO goddamn close again! Damn it.

This menu is a crucial, critical menu. Did you use the time wisely?

No, chef.

What? No?

Too many people were arguing on our team chef.

Oh, come on, ladies. Why are we arguing Julia on such an important occasion?

Because there was one person who wanted to run around and do every single thing.

Who was in charge?

I'm in charge, but unfortunately I can't do everything at once. I need help.

Stop. I didn't put you in charge, madam. You're standing there acting like some jumped up little cavewoman. Today's challenge quite frankly was a team effort. Let's hope what you have produced in the last hour is delicious.

Salmon, chef.

I've got a fucking headache. [checks the salmon, which is under-cooked] Ben! [pounds the counter] Salmon's raw in the middle!

Oh, maybe a little under.

It's pink! Come here you, hey, stop! [calls the blue team) Come here! [starts distributing pieces of salmon to the members] That's what brought to me, taste. Taste, yeah, yeah? [pounds the workstation and kicks the bin] FUCK! SHIT! What in the fuck is GOING ON?

All of you come here! Get in there! [The Blue Team enter the Red Kitchen] Let's put one shit mess with another shit mess! Get in there! There you go, join forces. We've gone backwards! And you're (Vanessa) just all over the place! And you're (Jason) just hopeless! And you (Ben) don't care! Pathetic! And then you look at me, gormless like, the salmon's raw when it was requested medium. And what do you say?

Different techniques.

[throws the ticket at Ben] Fuck off! Not good enough! I'm not going to continue this any longer. Winning team? Forget it! What's so FUCKING COMPLICATED? Christina, you made an effort— [flashback where she communicates with her teammates] to get all the appetizers out. Thank god! Unfortunately, we got screwed when it came to the first entrée. You've got to go upstairs and nominate one individual that's leaving here.

Yes, chef.

Petrozza, you stayed with it. Your mind was clear, your attitude was strong— [flashback where he communicates with her teammates] get upstairs and think about who you are going to nominate. One from the blue, one from the red. NOW GET OUT!

Yes, chef.

Bye-bye!

Love you, Bobby!

[calls out Bobby] Bob. Bob, come here. Yeah, I wouldn't go around looking for applauders right now. Right now is the wrong FUCKING TIME! GET OUT!!! [shouting loudly as Gordon orders him to leave the kitchen]

Yes.

Jackass waving at them! WHAT do we have to wave about?! I DON'T CARE!! GET OUT!!! [Gordon's last scream lets Vanessa and Matt run upstairs to the dorms]

(interviewing) Damn, man, another disappointment. It was horrible tonight, though. The words can't express, the look of disappointment on his face, he's probably feeling like right now that ain't nobody here competent to run his restaurant.

This is how I make my living and I can't fucking do it.

If I were on your station tonight, I would have done the same thing and you know that. You got the talent.

No, I don't.

Yes, you fucking do.

I've been in a fucking grill cook for 15 years and I can't cook a fucking steak. (interviewing) I feel worthless. This is all I know how to do and now I don't even think I know how to do this anymore.

Everybody expects me to put Corey up. I wish to God she would have fallen on her face.

Oh, yeah, Corey is evil.

She personally attacked me.

Okay, two beef, one wellington, one salmon.

Yes, chef!

(points to Matt) You, come here you! Come here, round here! Look at those pieces of meat there. You've got one fucking large one, one medium one and one small one. What are you doing?

(interview) Matt's meat, all three were totally different. Are you serious?

That's not good enough for me. So there you go. There's the daddy, there's the mummy, there's the fucking baby. Supposing that's the critic's table; one has that (large piece of beef) and another's got that (small piece of beef). [Picks up the small piece] Supposing that's medium-well. What happens?

It'll definitely shrink. (interview) The tenderloins really do shrink when they cook. I know better than that. I'm an idiot.

Look at it! We're fucked! [pounds the counter] What did I say to you? I'm looking for everything.

Yes, chef. Got it, chef.

Don't piss around now, yeah? That's bullshit!

Yes, chef.

Hey, Mr Inconsistent. Wake up.

Yes, chef!

Two sea bass, halibut, lamb, yes?

Yes, Chef!

How long?

One minute, Chef!

One minute, let's go!

(to Suzanne) I can go with that lamb, are you ready?

Sounds good; I'm ready.

I got the garnish!

You got that?

(bringing the lamb up) One lamb, medium, coming to the pass! (to Tennille) S'cuse me, behind you...

Sea bass, Suzanne!

I need another minute, sorry.

(to the server) Stop.

Fuck! If they would just-! (interview) Oh, not again!

Come on, fucking hell, come on...

Sorry, Chef. I thought I could do it, but...

Well, I'm fucking out to dry now, aren't I? I'm standing here with my fucking pants down again.

Just one minute, Chef! One minute!

Still one minute?

(to the Red Team) Everybody buckle down and let's go! We can do this!

Tennille! And you wonder why I go fucking apeshit? Stand here for five minutes and see how PAINFUL it is!

Understood, Chef. (interview) Everybody's got their stuff up! We don't wanna hold up the whole thing and let it get cold!

(to Suzanne) I'm not gonna- it's not gonna die here!

No, Chef!

Thirty seconds sea bass, yes?

Yes, Chef! (checks her sea bass, and it breaks) Shit! Fuck me!

Come ON!

Sorry, guys. (to Gordon) Chef, I killed the table.

TAKE THE FUCKING TRAY BACK!! Fuck off with you, yeah?! Fuck- fuck right off, yeah?! (takes the tray containing the rest of the order) There you go! (hands the tray to Suzanne) Yeah, that's you! Take it back!

(interview) NOW WE GOTTA DO IT ALL OVER AGAIN?! THANKS A LOT, SUZANNE!

You fucking shitting me?! UGH!!

RIGHT NOW, I AM NOT GONNA START SERVING HALF A FUCKING TABLE! NO CHANCE!

No, Chef!

AND NOW YOU'RE DRAGGING THE FUCKING KITCHEN!

(to Suzanne) We're behind. We gotta pick it up, okay?

I'm trying to go as fast as I can!

(interview) SUZANNE! SUNK! THE! SHIP! She sunk us! Left us on the curb!

(to Suzanne) DO SOMETHING ABOUT IT!!!

Guys, I can't have my station be a fucking dump pit!

You guys are fucking USELESS, but I am NOT going to shut this fucking place down! (to the red team) You, you, you, over there (the blue kitchen), work together! DOUBLE UP!

Yes, chef!

Move your arse!

What do you guys need?

Fucking hell. What do you need, yeah? I need 16 cooks.

All of you! ALL OF YOU! (Gordon interrupts Holli) That's you ditsy!

For one simple question.

Is that the best roast chicken and is that the best fucking beef requested mid-rare? (grabs Siobhan's hand) I want you to touch it. I want you to touch it! Touch it! Touch it! Touch fucking IT! (throws spoon away)

No.

No, no it's not. The chicken's dry.

Where's the gratin on top?

It got pulled off. It was on there before.

No, it wasn't.

Look at me! Is that the best?

No, chef.

Is that the best?

No, chef.

Is that the best?

No, chef.

Do me a favour: FUCK OFF, ALL OF YOU! GET OUT! GET OUT! And don't you dare switch it off, I'll finish it! Fuck off!

I would love to stay an-

GET OUT! OUT! GET OUT! (throws the chicken into one of the units) GET OUT!

(to herself) I'm sick of this shit.

[follows the red team] GET OUT!

That's really embarrassing. What happened?

[goes into the blue kitchen] Scott, come in here with me and I'll finish this one, please, yeah?

Okay.

Now, Chef Ramsay and his trusted sous chefs, Scott and Andi, will complete the red kitchen's dinner service.

Three spaghetti, one tagliatelle, yes?

Three spaghetti, one t- (sees the mess that the Red team left) Oh, my god! What the fuck did they do to this place?

Yeah, I know.

Wow, they're really bad, huh?

Yep.

While the blue team gets out all the desserts, Chef Ramsay calls the red team back to the kitchen.

All your entrées are served, everything's done. Now come back and do something you're good at, fucking cleaning! At least you'll do something as a team!

All of you, come here! What night is this? What fucking night?

Important night of the year!

Yeah, the most important night. Is this the most important gnocchi you've ever cooked?!

No, it's not.

Fuck off will you? (slams the pan on the workstation)

Come on, Trev.

What is that?

(interview) That looks like a big-ass booger.

Oh, my God.

Wake up, Trevor! Nothing's coming out! ON A NIGHT LIKE TONIGHT! WAKE UP!

(to Trev) My lobster's up and you have no garnish.

(interview) Get off my pass and let me cook!

(to Holli) Trev is gone tonight. What do you think?

Yeah.

What do you need Trev?

(interview) This is not what he needs. Trev sucks. Dude, are you stoned? Like, did you smoke a joint before you came in here?

Trevor, you can't serve with those carrots in a burned pan.

Oh, no. I am going to fucking fix it.

I'll help you!

Do not help me! Get the fuck out of my ass! Don't fucking help me!

(interview) He is so stupid.

Does anybody need help right now? I'm good on app(etizer)s.

Could use a hand over here, definitely.

Here's your shallots.

How many are on the garnish? One... two... three of you. Sabrina garnish, Nona garnish! Trev, what are you doing?

Working it chef.

(to Gail) Gail, go over to the garnish as well, and might as well.

(interview) I've never seen Chef Ramsay called over the entire kitchen to help one person. Ridiculous. [to Trev] The squash is burning.

The squash is what? Burning? [facepalms]

Tonight, Hell's Kitchen is once again the place to be in Los Angeles. The restaurant has been redesigned with a stunning balcony above the kitchen that gives those diners a unique view of the action of the kitchen.

[Carries the first order tickets to Blue Kitchen, approaches Gordon] 'Kay, alright! First order, chef!

[Receives the tickets from James] Let's go. [to Blue Team] Okay Blue Team, here we are! First ticket to the blue team: One risotto, one scallop, one squab, one spaghetti!

Yes, chef!

I'm sorry, chef, can you repeat that?

Can I repeat that?

I'm sorry? I-I'm sorry, chef!

Yeah, let me repeat it: Fuck yourself!

Yes, sir!

"Can I repeat that?" Is he (Chino) fucking stupid?

Okay, Red Team! Come here, let's go! [Red Team approaches Gordon] First ticket! Good luck!

Yes, chef!

Two tables away, table four: one scallops, one risotto. Entrée: One New York–

[Interrupts Gordon; Talks to other Red Team member] Oh, one risotto!

[to Elise] Hey, madam!

Sorry!

I'm not gonna shout over you.

I'm sorry.

I've got 10 seconds - a window - to call these out!

I'm sorry. I apologize.

Come here, you, Big mouth, come here. [Puts and bangs the ticket on the table] Call out the fucking ticket. COME HERE! Call out the ticket!

[Grabs the ticket, calls out the ticket to the Red Team] Y'all ready? We need one scallop, two risotto for appetizers!