Tennille quotes from Hell's Kitchen

But moments from opening, his optimism...

[sees some fondants at the pass] Oh, dear. Who cooked these?

...begins to fade.

Who cooked the fondants?

Lovely.

[calls out Lovely] Lovely!

Yes, chef?

Which they're not... come here! Why these are cooked? We put it in the oven when the order comes on.

Yes, chef.

We haven't even opened yet and you cooked them.

(interview) That's all we have to work with. We're fucking screwed.

[raises one fondant] Look at that! [scoops the fondant and drops it] Look. It's like a fucking hockey puck. Oh, my God! We're not even opened yet and you screwed it up! What a fucking disaster!

(interview) That's it. The end.

'Get fffucked!!

(interview) Obviously I was thrown in a kitchen with a bunch of circus clowns!

Look at this. I swear to God, [gets some scallops] it's the kind of shit you'd expect Tiger Woods to tee off with. Look at it. Rubber, rubber, RUBBER! [throws the scallops away]

But, they have to start over.

(on Melinda's cappelini) It's limp and shit!

And over.

(on Tek's scallops) It's fucking raw! [throws the scallops away]

(interview) We've only had one table, but have made the same dish six million times. That's chaos! That's like apocalyptic chaos!

For the eighth time, can I have one fucking scallops and a fucking beautifully cooked capellini?!

Let's go! This is RIGHT this time!

(to Melinda) Okay, you taste the pasta and you tell me.

First check it, we're rolling! Let's go, we can do it! (Melinda tastes the capellini) Is it cooked or not?

Yes, it's good.

Yes? Let's go!

(to Melinda) Is that cooked? It looks undercooked.

Is it cooked?

(tastes the capellini) Not cooked.

Not cooked?

Nah, that's not cooked. Not cooked. (Melinda throws the undercooked capellini away) Oh, my God! Why did you throw that away, Melinda? Just put it back on the stove, put the lid on the top and, 30 seconds cooking it! What do you do, you just... trash it straight away!

(interview) Melinda... she had that deer-in-the-headlights look and that'll kill you.

(Discovers more capellini thrown in the bin) Look at all this fucking... who's putting all this in the bin?! How many portions are you putting in there? How much is in the bin?! LOOK! LOOK! WHAT THE FUCK IS THIS?!

An hour into dinner service and the red team has cooked ten appetizers. But unfortunately, none of them have made it to the dining room.

(to Melinda) Hey, madam, how much capellini are you throwing away? (Melinda doesn't reply) Look at it! What are you doing, Melinda?! What are you doing?!

You're making me mad!

Yes, Chef.

Fucking mad!

Yes, chef.

(interview) That girl's gonna lead us to destruction. She's stupid! [shakes her head] Man!

Salmon, lamb please, how long?

Seven minutes, chef.

Hey, what's that piece of shit there?

It's supposed to be the salmon.

Holy fuck, look at that. It's like a... bison's penis - what is that shit? [opens up the salmon wrap, revealing the interior to be totally frozen] Look at that! Stone-cold, frozen salmon. Who put the salmon in the freezer?

Me. I fucked it up. (interview) The salmon was my fault because I stuck it in the freezer instead of the fridge, and it was frozen.

Yeah, you fucked up, big time!

All the salmon's the same, I think we're gonna have to eighty-six it.

Yeah, 'cos she's wrapped it frozen.

Heather

And we have five on order.

We've got five on order?

Heather

Five on order.

(to Amanda) Hey, ditzy! Great job!

Yes, chef.

Oh, fuck off.

Louie! [raises a chewed up piece of lamb] Wh... what is that? What is that? Did you bite that? Look! That's one, that's the other! IT'S ON THE SAME FUCKING TABLE!

(interview) Louie's lost. He's out of his league.

What's all that lamb here? Look at this! Hey, Van! You and Joseph! STOP! Look... at... this! Look! LOOK! LOOK! WHAT THE FUCK IS THIS?! LOUIE!

Yes, sir?

Fuck off back there. GET OUT! YES, get FUCKED, pile of SHIT! Hey, get upstairs, get your bags packed.

Can I help? Can I help in the kitchen?

Yeah, you can help me: GET OUT!

(interview) You want me out? You want me to pack my fuckin' bags? I'm out. My bags are packed. HE CAN KISS - MY - FUCKING - ASS!

With the kitchen at a complete standstill...

It's like a bad dream.

Chef Ramsay is left with no choice.

(to Joseph) SWITCH IT OFF.

Yes, chef.

(to the red team) Fuck off.

(interview) Anybody sitting at home thinking they can do this...Good luck. It's tough.

(interview) I've never had a dinner service like that. It was a complete and utter nightmare.

Where's the scallops?

One minute, guys.

MOVE YOUR ASS!

Ladies, ready. Scallops here, Chef.

Let's go. You've got no color on the scallops. Shit. Tennille! I've got no color on the scallops. Look, they're boiled.

(to Tennille) That happens when you put too much oil in the pan. They end up marinating themselves, ok?

(interview) Suzanne likes to Hear. Her. Self. Talk!

There's too much oil in the pan.

(interview) She needs somebody to smack her in her face and tell her to shut the hell up.

What are you doing with them now? You can't put the same ones back in the pan! Oh my god.

Yes, Chef.

YOU CAN'T PUT THE RUBBER ONES BACK IN THE PAN!

Just forget about that one, Tennille. Here, give that to me.

Oh my god.

How long Tennille?

(interview) You're talking to me! You're talking to me!

Tennille, how you doing?

(interview) Get out of the way, and let me cook my food!

Can you do it? Or shall I do it?

I can do it, Chef.

Let's go.

You ready? On those scallops? How much longer?

Tennille, how long?

MOVE YOUR ASS!

Yes, Chef.

Tennille, if you sink our ship, I'm going to be pissed.

Listen-

Fuck! What are you doing? What are you doing?

There's too many people talking to me at one time, and I'm just trying to do what you told me to do.

Ok, so do it then.

Yes, Chef.

And get rid of them.

Yes, Chef.

Take control of the situation.

Thank you, Chef.

Let's go, madame! Scallops please with the capellini, yes?

Yes, Chef. Yes Chef. (interview) Man, I almost sank the ship! (bringing scallops up) Scallops to the pass. (interview) But after they got out of my way, I was good to go. Did anybody notice that?

(to Tek, regarding the steaks on the grill) You need to organize them a little better so we can get more on.

I know, I'm going to. Just chill for a second. (interview) This is my station, and I know what I'm doing, so... back off.

Stand by, yes? Away shortly; five New York strip, one chicken! (Tek ignores him) She's not even answering me...

Five strip, coming up now!

NO ONE'S GOT MY BACK HERE! Tek!

Five strip, one chicken, walking up now!

Let's go, then! Where's the strip?

(brings the garnish to the pass) Five orders...

(sighs) Fuck off, Tek... Tek! (brings the steaks to Tek's station) That's fucking... that's still blue in there, yeah? Just touch that on top there, touch. Come on, touch it Suzanne! Touch!

(touches the steaks) Get it back in the oven.

Fingers are going right through it; it's blue!

Do you have room to start grilling off more?

Yeah, I will in one second.

(grabs more raw steaks) These are flatter, okay? These are thinner.

(interview) There were like, five people working a one-person station. Like, I know how to cook; I'm not a fucking dumbass. (back in the kitchen) Unfortunately, there aren't numerous hot places on the grill.

Okay, mark them and throw them in the oven; I've got a 500-degree oven back here.

(interview) You can't rely on that grill to cook your food for you! The grill has a purpose in that moment, and that purpose is to mark your food, and then you finish it in the oven!

Where's the steaks?

(brings the steaks to the pass) Coming up with steaks!

(checks the steaks) Now they're burnt... (brings the steaks back to Tek) I am fucking so upset! That's nicely cooked, that's nicely cooked, and then what are they for?

They're black! How can I serve THAT and THAT on the SAME TABLE, TEK?!?

Sorry, Chef!

I'M SO EMBARRASSED!! What's the matter with you, madam?! HALF THE DINING ROOM HAVE GOT THEIR ENTRÉES!! YOUR HALF ARE STANDING, STARING!!

(interview) Tek talks more of a game, but if she can't back it up, she's going home.

THIS MAY NOT BE IMPORTANT FOR YOU, MADAM, HEY- BUT MADAM, THIS IS FUCKING SERIOUS, AND YOU'RE SHIT!!! (to the servers) Yeah, just take the fucking lot back, will you? Get out my sight...

Oh, come on. This is not possible! (returns to the workstation) Come here! All of you, come here!

(interview) Whatever it is, it's not my fault.

This is not fucking possible! This cannot be true! [gets a piece of lobster] What is that there? What is that there?! WHAT IS THAT?!

This is---.

Yeah, its fucking raw! RAW!! [kicks the bins]

(interview) Come on, Amanda! All you have to do is put the lobster on the grill, make sure it didn't char, baste it and send it up. That's all you had to do!

It's a fucking restaurant, not a sushi bar! How can you get confused on a raw fucking grilled lobster?! I don't know where to go! I can't even turn and look at the dining room, I'm so fucking embarrassed! This is still your first table... (points to the Blue kitchen) that's their last! FUCK OFF!! WE HAVEN'T SENT AN ENTRÉE OUT!! STUPID COWS!!! [crosses over to the Blue kitchen, where the men are starting to clear down] Oh, fucking hell... Hey, have you all finished?

Desserts chef.

Desserts? Kevin, stay on desserts. All of you, come in here! Hey guys, get on a section will you, please, yes?

(interview) AWWW! Add insult to injury, rub salt in the wound, what... just... happened?

Away now: Two penne, three New York Strip, two chicken, one catfish!

Yes, chef!

(interview) AAAAAAAAGH! YEEAAAAH BOOOOOYS! (cups his ear) That's right. I can hear it. It's them bitches crying!

Do you need anything?

No, I'm cool. (interview) It was just scraps of meat, everywhere. It was a kitchen-pocalypse. Like a hand grenade went off in a cow's ass.

Two sea bass, halibut, lamb, yes?

Yes, Chef!

How long?

One minute, Chef!

One minute, let's go!

(to Suzanne) I can go with that lamb, are you ready?

Sounds good; I'm ready.

I got the garnish!

You got that?

(bringing the lamb up) One lamb, medium, coming to the pass! (to Tennille) S'cuse me, behind you...

Sea bass, Suzanne!

I need another minute, sorry.

(to the server) Stop.

Fuck! If they would just-! (interview) Oh, not again!

Come on, fucking hell, come on...

Sorry, Chef. I thought I could do it, but...

Well, I'm fucking out to dry now, aren't I? I'm standing here with my fucking pants down again.

Just one minute, Chef! One minute!

Still one minute?

(to the Red Team) Everybody buckle down and let's go! We can do this!

Tennille! And you wonder why I go fucking apeshit? Stand here for five minutes and see how PAINFUL it is!

Understood, Chef. (interview) Everybody's got their stuff up! We don't wanna hold up the whole thing and let it get cold!

(to Suzanne) I'm not gonna- it's not gonna die here!

No, Chef!

Thirty seconds sea bass, yes?

Yes, Chef! (checks her sea bass, and it breaks) Shit! Fuck me!

Come ON!

Sorry, guys. (to Gordon) Chef, I killed the table.

TAKE THE FUCKING TRAY BACK!! Fuck off with you, yeah?! Fuck- fuck right off, yeah?! (takes the tray containing the rest of the order) There you go! (hands the tray to Suzanne) Yeah, that's you! Take it back!

(interview) NOW WE GOTTA DO IT ALL OVER AGAIN?! THANKS A LOT, SUZANNE!

You fucking shitting me?! UGH!!

RIGHT NOW, I AM NOT GONNA START SERVING HALF A FUCKING TABLE! NO CHANCE!

No, Chef!

AND NOW YOU'RE DRAGGING THE FUCKING KITCHEN!

(to Suzanne) We're behind. We gotta pick it up, okay?

I'm trying to go as fast as I can!

(interview) SUZANNE! SUNK! THE! SHIP! She sunk us! Left us on the curb!

(to Suzanne) DO SOMETHING ABOUT IT!!!

Guys, I can't have my station be a fucking dump pit!

Fuck me. (returns to the workstation) Come here, both (Sabrina Gresset and Suzanne) of you! It's requested med-rare! All of you, come here! Touch that! Yeah, touch that! Touch that - YOU (Sabrina) TOUCH IT AS WELL!! What is that?!

Medium-well, chef.

Medium-well?

Well-done, chef.

Yeah, hey! Overcooked!

(interview) I overcooked liked an entire pan of lamb. Oh, it's terrible!

(slams the plates down) Medium-well? And... that's well done? (to Suzanne and Sabrina) Well-done to you! And well-done to you! I can't believe just how inconsistent you are! Do me a favour: You and you FUCK OFF UPSTAIRS! GET OUT! Both of you!

(interview) Holy shit! He's going to shut us down!

Get out! Get out!

Hey, Ariel, can you go up in two minutes?

Yes.

Good communication!

(interview) Save it 'til the end of service, Chef! You're making me blush!

Two scallops, let's go!

(walking to the pass with his scallops) I'm going up!

Two minutes, counting down! (interview) What's my name?

Tennille!

(interview) Tennille~!

Somebody's taking my fucking lead! The person I least expected to!

Tennille has impressed Chef Ramsay with her communication.

Coming up with two lamb and sauce right now, Chef. (brings the lamb and sauce to the pass) Lamb on your side, Chef.

Now she hopes to impress him with her cooking.

(plating the lamb) That lamb's perfectly cooked.

(interview) The first time I hear Chef say "This lamb's perfectly cooked", I'm like, "Stay perfect! As soon as you slip, you know what he's gonna do?! SHOVE THAT LAMB UP YO' ASS!"