Rachel quotes from Hell's Kitchen

What do you guy think we should do about the sauce?

What have you got?

I have a whole bunch of lamb stock and...

This is veal stock! This isn't lamb stock, this is veal stock. There's no way in hell we can pass this off as fucking lamb sauce.

(interview) I was totally desperate. Desperate enough to go over to the other team and ask them for some lamb stock. [crosses into the blue kitchen and goes over to Giacomo] May I have some lamb stock, please?

I don't think so.

[laughs] No way! Get out!

Please, you guys?

No way.

You guys don't want to share any with me? You guys don't know if you might need something in the future.

I don't give a fuck.

(interview) It was horrible. It was horrible. No matter what I did, something was messed up.

We are so fucked it's unbelievable.

Missy.

Yes, chef?

Why are you glazing it with butter and not egg wash?

It was egg wash, sir.

What's that in there?

That's egg.

Egg yolk or egg white?

Egg white?

Oh, no. Have they all been glazed all night with egg white?

Wrong thing evidently.

Oh, no. Why are wellingtons going in now?

We ran out, chef.

You ran out?

Yes.

Oh, fuck me... ladies, I personally don't want to do this anymore. (to Rachel) I'm fed up with your shit, (to Maribel) I'm fed up with your shit. (to Virginia) You've been a fucking letdown the minute you started cooking.

Yes, chef.

Then you LIED to me that the turbot's en route, when she (Sara) hasn't even got it out of the FUCKING fridge! Do you want to continue like this?

No, chef.

Fuck the lot of you, is that clear?

Yes, chef.

Fuck the lot of you!

Yes, chef.

[pounds the counter] You. Come here, you. (to Keith) Fat fuck. (to Tom) Hey, doughnut. Come here, you. Hey, ladies, come here. Let me tell you something, [takes off his apron and throws it at Tom] Here you go. [throws his towel at Tom] Here you go. I've had enough. I've had ENOUGH! I cannot believe you're actually attempting to fucking win a restaurant. Get back in your fucking dorms, and alone. By the time you get back in here, from the blue team, nominate someone that's going tonight. And from the red team, come back with someone that's leaving. NOW GET OUT! OUT! LEAVE THE STOVES!

I don't think we're getting dessert.

Oh, no. No, no, no. Rachel!

Yes, chef?

Come here, you. Come here. No, fuck it. All of you, come here right now. [pounds the counter] And eat. Eat that. Eat it. I'm, I'm, I'm--I'm dying to understand what's going through your FUCKING MIND! Now, what do you think of the quail?

It's overcooked. Little too much production on the sauce chef and you can see bones.

What's your verdict?

It's dry and tastes a little burned.

Yeah, it's shit! A little burned?! Fuck me! Do you need some glasses? (to Jean-Philippe) Ask one of the customers for his fucking glasses. There, table seven, he's got them (to Rachel) And what's in it for you?

It's overcooked.

Pssss...fuck off will you?

All right, let's do it again guys, come on. [Jean-Philippe returns with a pair of glasses]

There they are. There's the gentleman's glasses. I'm serious now! Does anyone need a pair of glasses? Fuck off, Jean-Philippe. Did you really think I was going to go out there with the quail, burned to a cinder? (Rachel doesn't answer) Did you really think I was going to send that? I need to know in your mind. Did you actually think I was going to serve that? (still no answer) Come here, you, come here. [leads Rachel into the pantry] What the fuck are you doing? Do you want to go home?

Ahem.

No, no, tell me now!

I will not let you down tonight.

You already have! I want to pull it back!

I will get you through entrées.

I know damn well you can do it. I can see it in your eyes. I can identify with the hunger but right now, missy, there's just a blonde empty fucking head.

I won't let you down.

Get it together, communicate, open up and start talking to me. Now move!

Yes, chef.

(to Maryann) How's it cooked?

It was cold.

Uhm, Rachel, come here.

Yes, chef?

Just touch that. What's the lamb?

It's well done.

It's requested pink. That's cooked to fuck! [pounds the counter] It's barely edible!! [sits down] Aw, for God's sake!

Rachel, this is pitiful. Rachel, you suck.

(to Rachel) Stop right there. I'm going to put you out of your misery. Switch it off. [crosses over to the blue kitchen] Just stop. Shut it down!

Heather West

Yes, chef.