“Episode Four” quotes from Hell's Kitchen

(to Garrett) There's not even an ounce of salt in there. Are you serious? We can't send any food, Garrett... GARRETT... Unless we've tasted anything. If you haven't tasted your own fucking food, what chance have you got!?

None.

I'd rather fuck off for a burger!

(on Maribel's potatoes) Maribel, what is that?

It's mashed potatoes, chef.

Tell me why is it gone like glue? Missy, I'd get some fresh ones if I was you.

(to her teammates) Do we have any more potatoes, guys?

Oh, dear. You know what? If that's the last thing in this country to eat, I'd fucking starve.

(to Tom) This order here is 7:35. Hello? Stop! Hey, lis--Stop! Come here, you... you idiot. Now I've FUCKING HAD ENOUGH! What I'm trying to tell you in your fucking eyeball, is that the quail in the spaghetti now, and you're putting the quail in.

No, I have the ones there.

THAT'S FOR-- THAT FUCKING ORDER THERE!!! [pounds the counter; the restaurant falls completely silent as the diners brought their attention, except for some ambience in the background] You're not bothered, are you? It doesn't hurt, does it? [stutters, points to his heart] There's nothing here.

No, it does. I can't yell. I can't cry. All I have to do is do it. [Tom's meat pan catches fire and Tom starts blowing it]

Oh, my God. [Gordon visibly gets even more stressed] THE DUCK'S BURNT!! YOU'RE COOKING IN A BURNT PAN, YOU FUCKING DICK!! [Tom keeps blowing the fire and it gets bigger] Oh, my God, leave it! Leave it! LEAVE IT!! JUST FUCKING LEAVE IT!! [places the pan off the burner and the fire goes out] You're going to blow fire in your face, you fucking DONKEY!!! Keith.

Yes, chef.

Get on the meat section, and stick next to him, and don't let him cook a FUCKING thing! And you (Tom), open those big eyes and watch what the fuck this guy's doing.

Yes, chef.

Shut it and watch!

Yes, chef.

SHUT IT!!!

I'm waiting on--

SHUT THE FUCK UP YOU!! YOU DONKEY!!!

Missy.

Yes, chef?

Why are you glazing it with butter and not egg wash?

It was egg wash, sir.

What's that in there?

That's egg.

Egg yolk or egg white?

Egg white?

Oh, no. Have they all been glazed all night with egg white?

Wrong thing evidently.

Oh, no. Why are wellingtons going in now?

We ran out, chef.

You ran out?

Yes.

Oh, fuck me... ladies, I personally don't want to do this anymore. (to Rachel) I'm fed up with your shit, (to Maribel) I'm fed up with your shit. (to Virginia) You've been a fucking letdown the minute you started cooking.

Yes, chef.

Then you LIED to me that the turbot's en route, when she (Sara) hasn't even got it out of the FUCKING fridge! Do you want to continue like this?

No, chef.

Fuck the lot of you, is that clear?

Yes, chef.

Fuck the lot of you!

Yes, chef.

[pounds the counter] You. Come here, you. (to Keith) Fat fuck. (to Tom) Hey, doughnut. Come here, you. Hey, ladies, come here. Let me tell you something, [takes off his apron and throws it at Tom] Here you go. [throws his towel at Tom] Here you go. I've had enough. I've had ENOUGH! I cannot believe you're actually attempting to fucking win a restaurant. Get back in your fucking dorms, and alone. By the time you get back in here, from the blue team, nominate someone that's going tonight. And from the red team, come back with someone that's leaving. NOW GET OUT! OUT! LEAVE THE STOVES!

I don't think we're getting dessert.