BBatdad
Batdad knows no fear! Batdad knows no pain!
S9 E5The Losing Edge
For what? Arresting me for what? I'm not allowed to stand up for myself? I thought this was America! Huh? Isn't this America? I'm sorry, I thought this was America.
Denver sucks ass.
USThe unnamed South Park player with the same body as Butters
Son of a biscuit!
PDPueblo Dad
Vamanos Pueblo! Vive El Pueblo! (Let's go Pueblo! Long live Pueblo!)
[takes out Spanish-English Dictionary] Pueblo no bueno...Pueblo es muy Mal. (Pueblo is not good. Pueblo is very bad.)
UFUnnamed Fort Collins player
Yeah we want to win? Then we will have to play this boring game all summer!
UFUnnamed Fort Collins player
We want to play video games!
UFUnnamed Fort Collins player
We're going down! We're going to get creamed!
UDUnnamed Denver player
You know what these guys look like? A bunch of winners!
UDUnnamed Denver player
Yeah! We're about to get our asses kicked!
UDUnnamed Denver player
Not a chance cause we're going to lose to you right now!
S9 E6The Death of Eric Cartman
I'm like the kid in that movie: I'm seeing dead people!
Well you know, Preacher says before your soul can be at peace, sometimes you have to atone for something bad you did.
Atone?
Did you ever do something really bad?
[Thinking] Not really.
Let's see, oh and I broke Mr. Anderson's fence and never told him about it, I took a crap in the Principal's purse - seven times, then there was the time I convinced a woman to have an abortion so I could build my own Shakey's Pizza, I pretended to be retarded and joined the Special Olympics, I tried to have all the Jews exterminated last spring... oh yeah there was this one kid whose parents I killed and them made into chili which I fed to the kid.
Boy, oh, boy, Eric you've got a lot to atone for.
Really?
Really. I mean honestly, I don't know how you're going to make up for all of this.
I know how... [He begins making gift baskets].
Hey, fellas, where's Cartman?
Cartman isn't our friend anymore.
We're ignoring him.
Ignoring him, how come?
Because he's a fat, racist, self-centered, intolerant, manipulating sociopath.
Oh yeah.
Hey I hate Cartman too; can I ignore him with you?
BOBradley and other boys off screen
Yeah / me too / yeah /screw him!
I never realized ignoring him was an option.
Don't be sad, Butters: what awaits each person in heaven in eternal bliss, divine rest... and ten thousand dollars in cash.
Cartman [walking backwards slowly and gesturing as if fading out]: Good-bye Butters, I'm going to a better place. Perhaps I'll see you again some time. Good-bye...
Cartman My soul is finally at peace. It's time for me to leave. Good-bye Butters, thank you for all your help. Good-bye.
Goodbye, Butters, I must be going now. I'll be looking down on you from time to time. Have a long, fulfilling life Butters! Good-byeeeeeeeee...
You son of a bitch, Butters.
Huh?
YOU TOLD ME I WAS A GHOST!!!!
But then I thought you were one!
HOW STUPID ARE YOU?! So help me God, Butters, I'm gonna get you back for this! I am going to GET! YOU! BACK!
S9 E7Erection Day
[reading a note from the sex ed "question box"] "Mr. Mackey is gay." OK, kids, that's not funny, m'kay! This box is supposed to be used for serious questions, about serious issues, m'kay? Let's stop the tomfoolery. M'kay, let's look at a real one here. "Dear Mr. Mackey, you are gay." All right, all right, that is enough, kids! Let's quiet down and try to be mature, m'kay! Here we go, m'kay. "Mr. Mackey, sometimes my parents hit me...and you are gay." Dammit is there not one serious question in here?! [quietly going through notes] "Mr. Mackey's gay..." "Mr. Mackey's gay..." Okay, here: "I am a boy at South Park Elementary. Sometimes when I'm sitting in class, my penis becomes hard for no reason. What should I do?"
These quotes come from Wikiquote's South Park pages and are available under the Creative Commons Attribution-ShareAlike License.