Butters Stotch quotes from South Park

Butters

Oh dear God, they're going to set us on fire. Oh great Jesus son of Mary, wife of Joseph! What are we going to do, huh? Oh sweet Joseph, husband of Mary but not father of sweet Jesus.

Butters

Aw, I was just about to sacrifice myself to Mr. Elway.

Butters

[talking through construction paper cut-out of a woman] Hey there good looking, what's your name? [talking through "Butters" cut-out] Butters, Ma'am. [through cut-out of woman] Well Butters, would you like to slap my titties around? [smiles; through "Butters" cut-out] Oh, well! Uh. [sadly] No thanks, Ma'am. I'll get in trouble again. [puts cut-outs away]

Butters

[pulling a cat's tail, laughing] I can do this forever! [the cat managed to break free and scratches him] OW!

Butters

[as Professor Chaos] Hello, Stella Dallas. I am Professor Chaos, and I'm gonna make you proud.

Butters

[feeling Wendy's enhanced breasts] Eew! They're all hard and oogy!

Butters

All he ever does is watch "Becker," and that show is so stupid.

Butters

[singing] Don't you kind of love December? When the merry snow bells chime. We're together once upon a wintertime.

Butters

Well, thanks for offering to let me in your clique, guys, but, to be honest, I'd rather be a crying little pussy than a faggy Goth kid.

Butters

I love life...Yeah, I'm sad, but at the same time, I'm really happy that something could make me feel that sad. It's like...It makes me feel alive, you know. It makes me feel human. The only way I could feel this sad now is if I felt something really good before. So I have to take the bad with the good. So I guess what I'm feeling is like a beautiful sadness.

Butters

I'm like the kid in that movie: I'm seeing dead people!

Butters

[after his parents leave a dead body for him to eat] Can't I just have some Spaghetti-Os?

Butters

[after seeing a police detective perform a rim job on a doll] My Uncle Bud did that to me once!

Butters

I'm supposed to be in school right now, but instead I have Snarf, Popeye, and Luke Skywalker all passed off.

Butters

[walks up to the pantry to start reorganizing the food after Stephen leaves the kitchen] Jeez. Nobody will even listen to me. It's like nobody even cares that there's vampires at the school. I tried to help and all I ever do is get hollered at.