S11Moving Bubble Bass
I hope you didn't damage my goods.
Oh, your goods are all good, Bubble Bass. And we sure build up an appetite for that free lunch. [Patrick gulps out a bib and fork and knife]
Oh, yes, about that. I'm afraid I was waiting for you so long that I ate them! [eats the paper bags] Mmm. [belches]
'[SpongeBob whimpers]
[inhales and swallows the fork, knife, and bib; he grumbles] If my friend SpongeBob doesn't get his free lunch, things are gonna get crazy! [pants while Bubble Bass melts]
That was the meanest thing I ever saw, Bubble Bass. You, sir, have crossed the line of aquatic decency. You might think you took a couple of bottom feeders like us for a ride today, but I got a newsflash for you, slappy. These bottom-feeders wouldn't eat your free lunch if you paid us!
Come, Patrick. I'll make you a free Krabby Patty for $2.50 plus tax.
[watches the pair leave and laughs] Well, you pulled it off, Bubble Bass. And you didn't even have to flick a fin. [hums and opens a box]
[emerges from a box and growls] Bubble Bass, why do you think it's funny to pack your mother in a box and drag her all over town?!
[shocked] MOTHER?! [grunts as she picks him up and stuffs him in two boxes]
[pulls a dolly out her hair] We'll just see how you like it! [pants as she pushes him]
I didn't do it! [Mama Bass bumps into a mailbox] OW! [bumps him into a building] Mother, please— [grunts] It was SpongeBob and Patrick! [grunts] I'll dry the dishes, Mommy. [grunts] I love you, Mommy. [episode irises out on him inside the box]
S11Bottle Burglars
[SpongeBob and Squidward sneak behind the Chum Bucket. Squidward goes to the front doors, but a meow sound startles him]
[appears in a cat costume] Sorry. [laughs] Stepped on my (cat) tail.
I'm a cat burglar! [purrs and meows around Squidward and stops] Okay, I'll change. [rips off his cat costume]
Good morning, Krusty crew! Ready to cook up a new batch of Krabby Patties? Er... [sees SpongeBob and Squidward injured] Why are you two smoldering?!
[covers SpongeBob's mouth] No, he's delirious! He doesn't know what he's saying.
[pushes Squidward away] No! Mr. Krabs deserves the truth. We accidentally threw away the Krabby Patty formula and Plankton found it!!! We tried to steal it back, but we failed!!!!! [sobs]
[gets raging and smoke steams out of his eyestalks] YOU DID WHAT!?!??!??!?! PLANKTON STOLE ME FORMULER!!!????!!?
[he and SpongeBob nod their heads] That's what he said. Yeah.
[calmly] Then I'll just have to steal it back. [walks over to the Chum Bucket] Hmm. Uh-huh. [punches a hole through the wall and grabs the secret formula from inside] Oh. [kisses the bottle] Don't worry. Papa's here.
S11High Sea Diving
Hooray for SpongeBob! He's our hero!
[The townsfolk cheer. But their cheering shakes the ladder even more.]
[The ladder crumbles and all of the trash as well as SpongeBob, Old Man Jenkins, and the townsfolk are sent crashing down to Bikini Bottom. The city is now a complete mess with trash.]
[pops out from the trash, grabs a bottle cap and a fork, and stands on Nat Peterson's head] I'm King Neptune! King of the seven seas, the lakes, rivers, puddles... [spits saliva into a spittoon] And spit too! I'm the king of spit!
KNKing Neptune
[off-screen] So you're the king of spit? [thunder roars]
[Out from the clouds, the real King Neptune appears on his chariot and he's not very happy.]
KNKing Neptune
"Uh-oh" is right.
[Old Man Jenkins stands scared as Nat Peterson, upon seeing the real King Neptune, whimpers in fear. He grabs a suitcase and runs away. King Neptune ignites his trident and zaps Old Man Jenkins, burning him to a crisp.]
I smell like toast. Am I breakfast? [bites off his hand] Needs jelly.
[comes by and notices the pile of trash. He also notices SpongeBob's hands sticking out from underneath] Hmm? [pulls out a mortally wounded SpongeBob] Ooh, well, look at that. Someone threw away a good SpongeBob standee. [laughs and throws SpongeBob in his truck-load of SpongeBob-standees] Yagh! [closes the trunk] Oof! [climbs in the truck] Ugh. [drives away with his truck, carrying SpongeBob and the standees inside]
MY LEG is really stressing out, Dr. Charley Horse.
CHDr. Charley Horse
[examining Fred's leg] Hmm. Uh-huh. [twists Fred's leg and bite it] You're right, Fred. It's so tense, but I've got just the remedy. Take off your shoes and follow me.
[wearing a gas mask] So far this plan stinks.
This is no time to be smelling stinks, Patrick. I need to protect FRED'S LEG, and I can't do it alone.
CHCharley Horse
The only way to relax YOUR LEG is to walk on... hot coals. [removes the rug]
SPSpongeBob and Patrick
Hot coals!?
[SpongeBob goes to protect Fred while Patrick hides in a sock.]
HDr. Horse
Now, Fred, close your eyes, and repeat after me the ancient mantra, "My feet are cold, my feet are cold…"
FHFred and Dr. Horse
'My feet are cold.'
My feet are cold. [stretches his foot out over the hot coals, but SpongeBob lays himself underneath] My feet are cold. [walks on top of SpongeBob as he burns] My feet are cold.
My feet are cold. Whoa! [falls on the hot coals] My butt!
HHorse
[his voice gets higher and starts to shrink as he walks on the hot coals] Oh! My feet are cold, my feet are cold, my feet are cold, my feet are cold…! [disappears; forms a word above the coals and whispers] Transcendence.
Aww, gee, some guys get all the lucky breaks. [kicks an empty can in SpongeBob's face]
[pulls the can off his face] At least you know that YOUR LEG'S perimeter is secured.
I know. I just miss being at the hospital.
Ooh! [leans closer to listen]
[whispers] I'm in love with a nurse.
Ooh, you're in love with a nurse? Ooh-hoo-hoo-hoo! Fred, I've got an idea. Why don't we hurt YOUR LEG so you can be reunited with your lady fair?
Let's do it, and we should step on it. It's almost time for her break.
I'd say it's almost time for your break.
[sighs] Thank you, SpongeBob. If it wasn't for you, I never would have made it back to my angel goddess.
Oh, don't thank me, Fred. YOUR LEG did all the heavy lifting. I can't wait to meet this angel goddess of yours.
Well, wait no longer, SpongeBob. Hello, Nurse Bazooka!
NBNurse Bazooka
Sponge bath time!
You know, this reminds me of a song. [sings] ♪ When I met you, my fingers went numb and my arms were all aloof.
But I tripped over your heart.
And now, my loneliness went poof.
Because... my leg is in love!
Hey, my leg is in love!
Like an old, snug shoe that fits like a glove!
My leg is in love!
Wow, my leg is in love!
Through my femur to the marrow is where Cupid shot an arrow!
So, my leg is in love!
Whoa! My leg is in love!
My calves are getting restless!
My quads are going crazy!
I'm in love with a nurse, and I think her name is Daisy! ♪
NDNurse Daisy Bazooka
[blushes] Me?
CChorus
♪ His leg is in love!
Yeah! His leg is in love! ♪
Yeah, my leg! ♪
CChorus
♪ His leg is in love! ♪
S11Ink Lemonade
Hello? [the door slams itself shut, leaving Squidward locked outside. Squidward tries to open it to go back in, but it wouldn't budge. The lights turn on. Squidward turns around and finds himself in a haunted themed area made by Patrick himself. He whimpers] I've lost it. I can't tell what's real anymore! [Patrick scares Squidward with a toy worm and a toy snail under his feet. The toy snail makes Squidward flip over and fall on the ground]
Boo! I'm a haunted tablecloth! [swings over Squidward with a tablecloth over his body; Squidward screams a sprays more ink out from his nose. The ink fills several cups, pitchers, bowls, and pails laid out by Patrick. Patrick swings himself into a wall and laughs. Squidward runs up the stairs while spraying ink in more cups and bowls laid out by Patrick. He runs into a spooky baby's room with creepy music playing in the background]
Not creepy nursery rhyme music! [Squidward hears a creaking sound in the crib behind him. He looks in the crib and sees Patrick wearing a creepy baby costume while having a nose similar to Squidward's]
Dada! [Squidward screams and sprays more ink out from his nose into the crib. Squidward runs out through the window. Patrick puts the sucker back on the baby bottle filled with ink] Thank you, Daddy!
[falls to the ground and sees a spooky but crudely version of the Krusty Krab in front of him.] The Krusty Krab? How did I wind up here? I don't think I want to go in. [a newspaper falls on him; he gasps as he reads it] This newspaper is dated 60 years into the future. [The conveyor belt underneath him moves and it takes him inside. Squidward covers his eyes] I can't look! I'm afraid to see. Please, no. [looks up and sees a puppet version of his old futuristic self in his workstation]
PSPuppet Squidward
May I help you, young man?
[Squidward's nose becomes a faucet and he screams the ink out of himself. Patrick, who is operating the old Squidward puppet, watches down happily. Squidward has had enough of the haunted area and goes to run away. He runs out of the haunted area and bumps into Don the Whale at the lemonade stand]
Squidward, if you want to buy some black lemonade, you'll have to get in the back of the line.
S11Mustard O' Mine
Hey, Squidward. You really should watch the closing doors.
[Squidward hisses at Patrick]
S11Shopping List
[Mr. Krabs is bathing in a tub of money in the restaurant. SpongeBob and Sandy enter the restaurant and sulk over to Mr. Krabs]
Oh, Mr. Krabs! [Mr. Krabs gasps and hides in the tub] I got all the secret ingredients on your list, but Plankton stole them all! I made the apocalypse! [cries a fountain of tears and spray them all over the restaurant, which hits Mr. Krabs]
[Sandy gets drenched on by the tears and activates the windshield wipers on her helmet]
[plugs SpongeBob's mouth with a cork] Now, now, son. You didn't make the apocalypse. I couldn't afford to have Plankton following me while I was getting the real ingredients at the Barg'N-Mart, could I? [pushes the button on the table Fred is eating on and it flips over showing a shopping cart containing the real Krabby Patty ingredients]
So, my list was a fake? So, no apocalypse?
I saved the world! [laughs and dances around the restaurant while Sandy glares angrily at Mr. Krabs] No apocalypse! No apocalypse! No apocalypse! No apocalypse!
[rolls up her sleeves] You mean you sent my best friend on a dangerous wild goose chase just so you could go shopping?! [backs Mr. Krabs into his office] Excuse us, SpongeBob. [closes the door while wearing her karate glove] This is for my tail!
Hi-yah! [karate chops Mr. Krabs really hard. Mr. Krabs ends up crashing into the door, buttocks first] This is for almost getting us killed!
Hi-yah! [karate chops Mr. Krabs really hard again. This time, head first at the door, and comes out with a bag of money as compensation for Sandy's submarine] And this is for my submarine, Matilda! [Mr. Krabs comes out and is completely beaten up. She kicks the plank Mr. Krabs is standing on] Hi-yah! Hi-yah! [karate chops Mr. Krabs and sends him flying through the roof]
Well, I guess I had that coming.
[Meanwhile, at the Chum Bucket, Plankton is fixing up a batch of Krabby Patties with the fake ingredients]
Can you believe it, Karen? After all these years, the secret ingredients are finally here! And the final ingredient: ghost dandruff! [pulls out a bucket of ghost dandruff from the bag]
[backs away] I wouldn't add that last one...
[adds ghost dandruff to the batch] Ha, ha! I can't wait to see the look on Krabs' face! [stirs the fake ingredients all together. Then all of a sudden, the Chum Bucket explodes and sends Plankton flying in the sky. He screams until he sees Mr. Krabs] Krabs?
S11Whale Watching
[Pearl is incredibly head of heels with her new boyfriend. She sighs and gently floats to the door, leaving a trail of dust that forms the word, "Swoon." Pearl's floating crashes through the front door and floats over to Mr. Krabs. She stops floating when she wakes up from her daydreaming.]
Again? Come on, Pearly-girl, we're running low on doors here! [picks out a door from the closet and pastes it to the front door]
Oh, I'm sorry, Daddy. I'm just so excited about going to the big party tonight! I—I—I just had to...
[cuts Pearl off] Oh, no! No, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no! Sorry, sweetie. [puts on his hat] Daddy's going out to play cards with the boys tonight. [his teeth is full of cards, his spits them out, and puts them in his sleeve]
No buts! I can't be worrying about you all night, honey.
S11Krusty Kleaners
[The last wall breaks apart and falls outside the building. Now, the entire building is completely destroyed. The scene changes to SpongeBob and Patrick finally cleaning the stain off the floor of the main office right before dawn]
SpongeBob SquarePants always keeps his word. That carpet is clean.
You sure did, buddy! Come on, pal. Let's go get us a snack.
Oh, I like that sound, SpongeBob!
[SpongeBob and Patrick leave the building as it now stands in ruin. Meanwhile, the worker, who was not aware of the destruction, gets up from his chair, stretches and prepares to leave. However, he falls downward. The security guard enters the ruins of the building and catches the worker. He sees the place completely destroyed and drops the worker]
S11Patnocchio
[The episode begins with a storybook entitled "Patnocchio." The book opens and the screens zooms into the picture of Karen in a beautiful fairy outfit holding her wand. She is seen standing outside of Bikini Bottom at night]
[to the viewers] Greetings, children of Bikini Bottom. I am Karen the Computer Fairy. [waves her wand and a scallop flies on her hand; she sings really loud, which causes the scallop to shatter into bits, acting like glass.] And I have a magic tale to tell. [waves her wand and a picture of Patrick appears on her screen] Once upon a time, there was a dim-witted sea star [Patrick appears in a puppet outfit and looks a lot like the character, Pinocchio] who was about to stuff his fat face. [waves her wand with the word "Magics" fly by; her screen shows the Krusty Krab]
S11Plankton Paranoia
I know you're in here, Plankton. Where are you hiding?
[off-screen] I'm right here... [Mr. Krabs jumps out and sees the television on] at the Chum Bucket! Come on down and try our new Chum Nuggets.
Heh. [turns off the television] Whew. [sees Plankton's shadow and gasps; he hides behind a pole; he looks and sees that is was only a cup with two straws] Oh. [chuckles] Just a—just a cup. [hallucinates when he sees the cup transform into Plankton. Plankton laughs evilly and Mr. Krabs becomes scared. Everywhere he looks, he sees everything transform into various images of Plankton, laughing evilly at Mr. Krabs. Mr. Krabs runs to escape, but no matter how he attempts to escape, all of the images of Plankton keep following him while laughing evilly. Mr. Krabs crawls into a hole, which turns into Plankton's eyeball and reveals a red demonic version of Plankton holding the secret formula while laughing evilly. Back in reality, Mr. Krabs is completely losing himself and screams. He runs to the bathroom and goes to wash his face at the sink. He washes his face] Get ahold of yourself. Get ahold of yourself. [turns off the faucet and sighs] I'm starting to see things. [laughs. He hallucinates again as he is seeing his eyestalks transform into Plankton. He screams and gibbers. He runs up the pole with the formula and pops out from the ceiling]
