Plankton quotes from SpongeBob SquarePants

Brace yourself, SpongeBob! This is my lab! [passes a real life Labrador retriever]

But it's becoming increasingly obvious. I can deny it no longer! I am small.

[sarcastically] Oh, goodie. Holographic meatloaf again. [slams his fists on a table] When am I going to get some real food?! Mr. Krabs gets to eat real food. Just look at his daughter, she's as big as a whale! I wish I could be as successful as Mr. Krabs. I wish I could just somehow switch lives with him... just to know what it's like!

It's great to be back! [sees Bikini Bottom got shrunk]

[walks outside the Chum Bucket] What's this? Drops of rain frozen into ice crystals? I shall harness their energy and rule the world! [laughs evilly, but a bunch of snow falls on top of him] Ahh... oh, stop! I WISH TO RULE YOU! [he is now buried in snow]

Hear me, Krabs! You'll take this Krabby Patty from me when you pry it from my cold, dead...[as he is getting picked up by Mr. Krabs; in a high-pitched voice] Felicitations, malefactors! I am in town to find my minions! And I just know how to speak their lang- [Mr. Krabs flicks him outside the Krusty Krab] (screams)

Ahem! Mama's little evil genius needs a diaper!

A traveling restaurant, eh? It's not fair! I had that idea years ago! No matter. If Mr. Krabs wants to play dirty, then Plankton's ready for his turn to take his turn.

These Atlanteans leave a room full of the most advanced weaponry unguarded? No wonder they got lost.

Now, I've been waiting for 20 years to have the amount of customers Krabs sees everyday! And I won't let that be ruined because the show's "boring," or the food's "inedible." So sit down, enjoy the show, and BUY SOME CHUM!

[singing]

Enough with these petty carnal senses. If I'm going to get the Krabby Patty recipe...[he arrives at...] The brain!

Hi, friend! [he gasps as he saw "Superficial Greetings" on the brain] "Superficial Greetings"? What kind of idiot...? [sees the parts of the brain] -"Personal Opinions"? "Knock-knock Jokes"?! No, no, no, no! This is all useless!

Observe in this conveniently timed flashback.

Hey, buddy! [door slams] Squidward! [door slams] Free cleaning service? [door slams] Census taker. [door slams] Good day, kind sir. Would you like to buy some Gil Scout cookies? [door slams] Ow! [tape rips]

[eye appears] Success! [another eye grows] Uh oh, that ain't good. [even more eyes grow] No, no, no, no no no no no no no! I can see everyth- [an eye grows inside of him and pops out of his mouth]