Patrick quotes from SpongeBob SquarePants

Patrick

Heart on stick, must die! [goes to the pole and tries to pick it up but can't; Patrick sees a little girl eating a heart-shaped lollipop] Heart on stick, must die. [grabs it, breaks it, and stuffs it in his mouth]

Patrick

[voice only, in a can of tuna] Hello? Does somebody have a can opener?

Patrick

What's so great about being a big pink loser?

Patrick

This is it! All of the clues are coming together. I followed these footprints right to this exact spot, and then, right where you're standing, I found this bag of peanuts! Ha! Oh, I'm so close to solving this crime, I can almost taste it. [zoom in on Patrick seemingly licking SpongeBob's head. Zoom out to reveal that he is actually licking a yellow ice cream pop] Boy, crime fighting sure makes me hungry, and this yellow Popsicle hits the spot.

Patrick

Does this mean we're not getting pizza?

Patrick

[Not realizing he's in Mrs. Puff's Boating Class] I thought this was Spanish class! See ya, SpongeBob! See ya, Big Fat Meanie!

Patrick

[cleaning out ear wax to the mirror] I didn't even know I had an ear. Huh? [notices water splashing from the toilet behind him] Hey, I just cleaned that one!

Patrick

I've got to put on my teeth and brush my pants!

Patrick

Where am I? What happened? Oh yeah, the party. I must have passed out in SpongeBob's kitchen...on the ceiling. See, SpongeBob? I told you we shouldn't stay up past 8:30, things get real crazy after 8:30. [has a flashback of last night's tea party] She really knows how to pound 'em down huh, SpongeBob?...SpongeBob?...SpongeBob?...SpongeBob? [notices SpongeBob snoring with a donut in his hand] That's a good lookin' donut.

Patrick

I'm sorry, SpongeBob, but you've become a negative influence!

Patrick

Who's Nick? Sorry, Squidward. I couldn't wait any longer, I've gotta use your toilet. No questions! Thanks [enters the bathroom he groans and flushes the bathroom] [after using Squidward's toilet] Uff! I wouldn't go in there for a couple days...or weeks.

Patrick

All right, I play a mean belly. [plays his belly as a drum; as he plays the William Tell Overture, it sounds as if he's playing a professional timpani drum]

Patrick

LIVING LIKE LARRY!

Patrick

SpongeBob, you can't expect my usual brand of stupidity. I like to mix it up. Keep you on your toes.

Patrick

[laughing] My shorts are wet!