You just have no long-term memory because you get high all the time.
Don't preach to me, fatso!
I can preach to you all I want, 'cause you're stupid!
YOU'RE stupid!
Oh, yeah, well you're a towel!
YOU'RE a towel!
S5 E8Towelie
Oh, man, I'm so high right now. I have no idea what's going on.
That's my last J, asshole!
S5 E9Osama Bin Laden Has Farty Pants
America may have some problems, but it's our home, our team. And if you don't wanna root for your team, then you should get the hell out of the stadium.
I told you, jawas have no heart.
Jawas?
You know, sand people.
SSStan's Afghan counterpart
[to the other counterparts] We're speaking in English; does that make sense?
CNCNN Newscaster
The world has backed down from its support of the U.S., saying they were only really just kidding.
You really think that your civilization is better than ours? You people play games by killing animals and oppress women!
AKAfghan Kid
It's better than a civilization that spends its time watching millionaires walking down the red carpet at the Emmy's.
[to Kyle] He's got us there, dude.
Stanley, your mom's a little freaked out right now. Why don't you go outside and play with your big brown package from Afghanistan?
Sharon, don't you think maybe you should watch something else? You've been watching CNN for about [checks his watch] eight weeks now?
[The boys are confronted by Afghan soldiers]
Uh, greetings from Canada. Well, boys, it's about time we get back to our house in Canada, isn't it?
Hey, what the hell are you talking about? I'm not a goddamn Canadian and neither are you.
Cartman, you stupid asshole.
S5 E10How to Eat with Your Butt
PPhotographer
Take off your hat, please?
But I never take off my hat.
PPhotographer
Come on now, I bet your parents want a picture of you looking natural.
This is how I look natural.
Why did the...pigeon cross the road?
Okay, why?
Because it was having sex with the chichi... Because it was having sex with the ch-hi-hi... Because it was having sex with the ch-ch-ch-ch-ch-ch-ch... eh, it was having sex with the ch-ch-chicken.
S5 E11The Entity
[Kyle is paying Cartman $40 not to rip on his cousin for being Jewish]
Now, Kyle(2), I need you to be quiet. In my class, you need to be able to concentrate. Concentration is the key to succeed in my class.
Maybe we should send him to a concentration camp. Ah! Dammit, dammit, dammit!
Cartman!
But what about Cartman?! He rips on ME for being Jewish! He's gonna tear this kid apart!
These quotes come from Wikiquote's South Park pages and are available under the Creative Commons Attribution-ShareAlike License.