Rusty quotes from The Loud House

OK everybody, up top. [all five high-five] First middle school high five, check. Who's ready to rock day one? [Everyone groans]

I know I am. Grew this sweet new 'stache over the summer, so I'm golden.

OK, A: I'd hardly call that a 'stache. And B: why can't you just admit you're nervous like the rest of us?

Guys, there's nothing to be nervous about. Especially because we'll all be together in Mrs. Salter's class, which Lynn said rules.

But Lincoln, we're gonna get eaten alive! We're not big fish anymore.

Everybody calm down, I'm telling you. [blows harmonica and clears his throat.] As long as we're together, we'll be fine.

Stella

Ooh! Lincoln, isn't that your sister?

Leni

[notices her brother] Hey, Lincoln! It's like, totes packed in here. Mind if we share your booth?

Well, it's already… [Leni and her friends end up squeezing in] Full.

[gasps] Is that spaghetti pizza?

Yum!

I'm starving!

Fiona

Oh, can I have a slice?

Oh. Well, I guess. [the teens devour the whole pizza] So, what are you guys doing here?

Yeah, don't you guys usually hang out at the mall?

Usually. But Dim Yum is closed.

Yeah, but the skee-ball is open! Come on, let's play some games!

[offended] They ate all of our pizza. Now they're playing all of our games?

Y'all, they're takin' over this place like skeeters on a sugar sucker.

Guys, it's okay. It's only for an afternoon. We can still have fun.

Mind if I get next? I don't get A's very often.

Fiona

Sorry, dude. Miguel's gonna be here for a while. He's on a roll.

Only 10,000 more tickets and he has enough to win the Rip Hardcore Waffle Iron!

[singing] Waffles!

I've been saving up my tickets for years trying to win that! [sulks sadly]

Stella

I don't get it! How does Katherine Mulligan keep scooping us?!

Someone needs to try to leak to her. My cousin Derek's starting to be a plumber. He says you have to find a leak and plug it or it gets worse.

Rusty's right. If we don't do something, this could be the end of the Action News Team.

We shouldn't follow the rat. We should wait at the nest.

What in the manure pile does that even mean?

Katherine is the nest, dawgs! If we follow her, the "leaker", or "rat", is gonna come to her!

Then we'll have our culprit! Rusty, that's a brilliant idea! Looks like it's time for an Action News Team undercover investigation!

8:02. Katherine takes a bite of Danish.

Stella

Roger that.

Gotcha. [he and his friends run over to Katherine and Principal Ramirez, surprising them with horror] Principal Ramirez! Action News Team!

Excuse me.

Principal Ramirez, how much has Katherine Mulligan been paying you to steal out news stories?

I don't know what you're talking about.

[sneaks up next to her and puts the microphone in her face, causing her to wobble and fall into the lake] We're asking the questions here.

The jig is up, Katherine "Shady Shader" Mulligan! The book Principal Ramirez was going to give you, is a bunch of phony news leaks we planted! Bam! [looks closely at the book cover] "Passion under the Pompeii Moon?" Uh-oh.

[snatches the book from him, angrily] You bet you're "uh-oh." Ms. Mulligan and I are in a book club together. Now someone get me out of here.

That's the story. We've been meeting to swap novels we're reading.

Stella

So you weren't leaking our stories?

Of course not! This what you spend your time on, making false accusations? I have half a mind to shut down the Action News Team.

Stella

Please, don't!

No, dawg!

We're sorry.

Give us another chance.

[steps in front] I'm Katherine Mulligan, and I agree with these children. Sure, they got the story wrong. But they've got real drive. [giggles] It reminds me of me when I was starting out. I say they deserve a second chance.

[out of her mind; annoyed] Fine. [The Action News Team jump and share a high-five; exits the lake, wagging her finger] But no more wild goose chases or knocking principals in lakes.

Promise.

We swear.

It was Zach.

Thanks, Ms. Mulligan. But we have to know, how the heck have you been able to scoop us?

With help from my boyfriend. He's a real sweetie with even sweeter leads. But I had no idea he was getting them from you.

[pulling up in his car] Hey, Rusty!

Dad, what are you doing here? Did you forget I'm hanging with the Dawg Squad, today? [hugs his friends all together]

"Dawg Squad?"

Stella

Yeah, we never agreed to that name.

Stella

You okay, Rusty?

I just sold Mick Swagger's pants! This could run Duds for Dudes for life!

All right, Stella!

Way to go, Stella!

[impressed] Nice work, Stella! I want to enter you in the state science fair. The winner gets a trip to robotics camp and an annual pass to the science museum.

Stella

Really? That sounds incredible! Count me in.

[picks her up and hugs her] Whoo-hoo! [sets her down] I can't wait to cheer you on during your presentation! Each student gives a big speech to the board of middle school scientists and an auditorium full of people. Go, Stella! [walks off]

Stella

Wait. [worriedly] What?

What is going on with her?

I don't know, but, she ain't right.

Zach, what was on that tape you gave her? Did you mess this up?

No way! I'm the master of hypnosis. But, uh, I'll go to Stella's house and check the tape, just to be sure. And keep an eye on her until I get back.

All right, team, we need a story that's gonna top last week's feature: Water Fountain Etiquette with Clyde. Any suggestions?

Hmm…

Ooh, I got one! Me!

[sighs] No, we're not doing another piece on your ab routine, Rusty.

Stella

[takes a box of complains] Yeah, we're still sifting through the complaint letters.

Say what you want. There's one name on everybody's lips.

[grabs and picks up Zach by the backpack after being tackled] You need two seconds to tell me what the blue blazes is going on!

Don't panic, but there's an alien inside of you, Mr. B. I can totally prove it! See [shows his detector] It's flashing, which means… [his detector is low on battery power] Low battery… [chuckles sheepishly] Let's just call this a whoopsie.

[drops him] A whoopsie?! We must call it… [yelling angrily in his face] TWO DAYS' DETENTION FOR TACKLING A TEACHER, GURDLE?! [storms off]

You okay, Zach?

Stella

We saw everything.

Uh, yeah. Well, at least it's only two days of detention. [his friends gasp] What? What's the big deal? I've had detention before.

Yeah, in elementary school. This is middle school! The other bullies are bigger, and so are their wedgies!

Yeah. Lynn once told me about a kid who went to detention, and the other kids gave him a wedgie very hard, it stunted his growth!

[shudders nervously] Oh, great. What am I gonna do?!

Don't worry, dawg. I'll be there to help you because I need to help you.

Good morning, kids! Hope you're enjoying the cooler temperature. As Astrid Bjorklundson says… "Temperatures as cold as ice will help the children learn real nice."

Who is this Bjorklundson character anyway?

She's a leading education specialist from Sweden. And she has the coolest glasses. Check her out! [pulls up and plays a video on her phone]

My patented Astrid Method has improved student performance in over fifty countries. I not only preach the Astrid Method, I practice it myself. Brr! Thanks to that icy plunge, I just got ten new ideas! Hej då!

Soon enough, you kids will be the top students in all of Southeast Michigan! I can see you're all shaking with excitement. And just a heads-up, from now on, school will start at 6:03 a.m. for mindful yoga. [plays another video]

To aid the student's aspirations, begin the day with meditations. Astrid Power Pose!

Fun, right? Hej då! [skates off]

I can't start school that early. I need two hours in the morning to deep-condition my fiery mane.

Stella

We're sorry, Principal Ramirez. We shouldn't have deceived you.

It's just that the Astrid Method was making us miserable.

Eating all that fish was cramping my style with the ladies.

Yeah, it was the fish.

[sighs] Look, it's my job to make sure you're set up to succeed, and the Astrid Method guarantees that'll happen. So, we'll resume the program on Monday.

[as his friends groan in disappointment] Dang it.

Nej, wait. Principal Ramirez, studies have shown that student happiness is crucial for success. If these children aren't happy, than that means the program isn't working. I'm going to have to rethink it. [to the Action News Team] Thank you for your honest feedback.

[enters the Action News Team's newsroom; disappointed] Hey, y'all. [walks over the desk where Lincoln and Clyde are sitting] I'm sorry that yesterday's segment weren't all that and a bunch of oats.

It's okay, dawg. We can't all have this kind of charisma. Uhh, another dizzy spell. [twirls around and faints]

Oh, Boris has been waiting an eternity for our pizza.

Morpheus

[clears throat] Allow me to help. [flips through the pages of his spell book] Pillows, pinwheels, pitchforks. Ah, pizza. "Sauce like blood and cheese that bubbles, bring our pizza on the double!"

[gasps as the pizza box flies past him, but smacks him in the face] Watch the hair! [sees the pizza box drifting over to the three Morticians and Lucy and Boris begin eating; amazed] Oh, wow! Hmm… [gets an idea and runs over to the booth] Hey, Lucy, still gothing it up, I see. Anyway, can I get an intro to your wizard friend?

[annoyed] Ugh, whatever gets you to leave me alone the quickest. Hey, Morpheus, this is my favorite brother's favorite friend, Rusty.

Oh, great and powerful wizard of 'Za. [bows down to Morpheus] I remember that trick you just did. Very sweet. You wouldn't just have any spells and help me get the high score in Dance Battle? [grins awkwardly]

Morpheus

Ugh, normy dancing. Cringe.

You call this cringe? [shows off his dancing skills, ending with a split] Aw, yeah!