Lynn Sr quotes from The Loud House

Lynn Sr.

[off-screen] Honey, Flip's in the backyard, again!

Lynn Sr.

Aw, that's cute, honey, but we can't use your pacifier to pad -- [sees what Lily warned him about] AHHHH!!! WHIRLPOOL!!!

Lynn Sr

Aw! We got the last ding dang slot!

Lynn Sr

You MONSTERS!

Lynn Sr

How could you give us ANOTHER thumbs down after what my kids JUST DID FOR YOU?!

Lynn Sr.

[Appears upstairs, having overheard Lincoln] Lori?! Did someone say Lori?! [Runs down to the stairs and trips. He bounces down on his rear and lands with a bellyflop on Cliff's hairball. He gets up and hugs Lori] l can't believe it! My little Lori - Lou! And she's not on a screen! Oh! [Happily hugs her tightly]

Lynn Sr.

'Kay, who wants ice cream for dessert? [Looks at the dessert] Oh, l guess it's a little melty. Sorry about the soggy vanilla.

Lynn Sr.

l have no idea why we're laughing! [All continue laughing; cut to the exterior of the Loud House] Seriously, why are we laughing?

Lynn Sr.

[accidentally crashes the bus into a telephone booth as Rita glares at him] That came out of nowhere.

Lynn Sr.

[walks out of the house, woozy and delirious; rubbing his eyes] Huh? [his POV shows the neighborhood warbling; walks over to the garbage truck, mistaking it for a taxi while Dink is tossing in trash and listening to music; groans] Taxi! [climbs into the back of the truck and drives away] Whew! Some of these cabs are due for a cleaning.

Leni

Thank you folks for coming. After much investigating, I've just figured out that Lincoln is innocent. It was Lynn! And Luan! And Mr. Coconuts!

[gasps] You can't prove nothing!

Leni

Of course I can! [flashback to Lincoln doing his laundry duty when his stomach rumbles and rushes upstairs, out of the basement] Lincoln left the laundry room between 12:00 and 12:30 while the whites were washing, and when he did, the trio made their move. [Lynn, Luan, and Mr. Coconuts enter the basement, smirking slyly] First, Luan tossed her yellow socks in the wash! But peach socks alone couldn't dye the laundry peach. That's when Lynn threw in her red jersey! [Luan adds her yellow socks in the wash and Lynn adds her red jersey and presses "start" to turn on the wash; the whites dye peach as the clothes mix] And while all of this was going on, Mr. C. was acting as a lookout.

[not seeing the problem] That story don't seem to make a lint of sense!

Leni

Sure it does, and I've just had proof. [takes out coconut-scented detergent, and the other family gasps] When I interviewed Luan, I caught a whiff of something sweet. At first, I thought it was her coconut pie until I interviewed Lynn, whose jersey smelled exactly the same. Once I found the detergent, [pours some in the cap, and smells it] it all made sense.

[sniffs Lynn's jersey and Luan's socks] She's wright. They smell the same!

But why?! Why did you do it?!

Luan

Oh, Lincoln, isn't it obvious? [flashback to breakfast; voice-over] At breakfast, this morning, you totally snagged my gag! Hey, folks! What's a sheep's favorite fruit?

Baa-nana!

[voice-over] And I had a soak in it!

[voice-over to when she entered the kitchen and finds Lincoln eating her meatball sub, much to her anger] And then later, you ate my spicy meatball sub, which I was saving for my pre-game protein boost!

[voice-over] You stung us good, kid, so we came up with a plan for revenge.

Luan

We're sorry. We just got back at Lincoln for framing him. It was an awful idea, but we'll just replace everyone's clothes. Promise!

Enough with the sob story. Lana, take them to the slammer!

Rita

Or, instead, we put them on laundry duty for the next month.

Lynn Sr.

Works for me.

I'm on board with that.

And we'll just get Lincoln something, too. How's a limited edition David Steele comic sound? [playfully elbows him] Eh?

"Hey, Luan."

Luan

"Hey, Lincoln. What do you think of this joke? If I were you, I'd go for the baboon!"

"I don't get it."

Luan

"Oh! Well, that's just the punchline. I still gotta think of the setup."

Rita

"Lincoln, honey! I need you to take out the trash!"

"Okay, Mom! 5 minutes!"

Rita

"Not 5 minutes! Now!"

"I will! Just give me three minutes!"

Lynn Sr.

"Lincoln, listen to your mother!"

Lynn Sr.

[weeping] That was my first car, and my dad's first car, and his dad's first car!

Rita

[enraged] ALRIGHT, EVERYONE, BACK INSIDE! THE ROAD TRIP IS OFF! YOU'RE GOING TO SPEND THIS WEEKEND SITTING TOGETHER IN THE LIVING ROOM UNTIL YOU LEARN TO GET ALONG!

Aw!

Merry Christmas, Mr. Grouse.

We all chipped in and got you something.

It's a bus ticket.

Luan

So you can go see your family for Christmas tomorrow.

Rita

And since you can't be with them tonight... [Rita and Lynn Sr. finally reveal their faces] ...we're bringing our family to you.

Lynn Sr.

How bout it, neighbor?

LOUDS! [in a warmer tone] You've made this the best Christmas ever. Thank you. I'd say you all landed permanent spots on Santa's nice list.

Even me?

Even you. [Lola hugs Mr. Grouse's leg]

Once again... [sobs]

Well, what are you waiting for? Everyone inside!

What's going on? What happened to the fighting?

Lori

Pfft. We're over that. We made up.

All of you?

Correct. Threat level is back to Field of Daisies.

Lynn Sr.

[offscreen] Oh, thank goodness!

I don't understand. How did you fix everything?

No, Lincoln. You fixed everything.

Me? How?

By leaving.

Luan

We told you, if you just butted out, we'd resolve it on our own.

But the dress?

Leni

I came up with the perfect solution: Lori gets to wear it on the days that end in Y, and I get to wear it the rest of the time.

And once they made up, the rest of us made up.

Heh. Well, I guess I've learned my lesson: Always respect the sister fight protocol.

Glad you're finally getting it.

Oh, I totally do, believe me. Next time when Lynn says she needs a windshield wiper when Lisa talks, or Lana says Lola snores like Pop-Pop, I am staying out of it.

You said what now, sporty?!

Oh, I snore, do I? How can you hear me over all your sleep-farting?!

Lynn Sr.

Phew. Can't wait to use the real toilet.

Lynn Sr.

Aah! Retreat! Retreat! [Runs back into his room]

Wait for me! [rushes to join them as the brawl shakes the whole house]