Isn't there anything I can do?!
KSKyle's cousin
If you cured cancer and AIDS next week, you would still owe two presents.
Jesus Christ!
“Red Sleigh Down” · Season 6, Episode 17
In this episode: Santa (3), Eric Cartman (1), Stan Marsh (1), Randy Marsh (1), Butters Stotch (1), Sheila (1), Jesus (1)
Thanks a lot, Cartman! Because of you, there isn't going be a Christmas, and there is nobody left to help us!
[Jesus hands up, is talking to two Iraqis]
Yea, look upon me and know me. My children, you should know something. [a knife comes out of his sleeve] I'm packing!
[Jesus stabs one Iraqi with the knife with one hand and kills the other with a silenced handgun]
[to an Iraqi] I'm gonna fucking kill you!
IIraqi
You're not in the position to kill anyone. I just want you to tell me America's plan.
Then we're in for a long night, 'cause I don't know shit!
I just couldn't do it. [camera flashes onto dead Iraqi] I just couldn't let him live. He shocked Santa's balls!
[singing] Don't you kind of love December? When the merry snow bells chime. We're together once upon a wintertime.
Christmas is a very special time of year, but this year it almost didn't happen. There's a man named Jesus who gave his life to save me. And so I declare that every year on Christmas Day. We should remember Jesus for what he did, and thank him for it. From now on, Christmas will be a day for remembering a brave man named Jesus.
Stan!
Kyle!
These quotes come from Wikiquote's South Park pages and are available under the Creative Commons Attribution-ShareAlike License.