Homer Simpson quotes from The Simpsons

Homer

Stop saying things, Bart. That's the TV's job.

Homer

Let this be a lesson to you, never form emotional attachments... also don't be a cow.

Homer

I never wanted to be famous for being mean. I wanted to be famous for catching Santa Claus.

Homer

[Talking to his mother] You keep disappearing and reappearing and it's not funny. You're just like that show, Scrubs.

Homer

[while falling] Aw, come on gravity...You used to be cool.

Homer

[holding toy newspaper] For your information, The Daily Growl is the only newspaper that's not afraid to say how great this country is.

Homer

Well, you know, it is awfully hot today. [chuckles] Now I'm too cold. Mmm.

Homer

This doesn't happen in America! Maybe in Ohio--but not America!

Homer

Hey, everybody pees in the pool.

Homer

I'm going to find Dondelinger and tell him I know what he did last summer...22 years ago...in the winter!

Homer

Hooray for stupid Flanders!

Homer

Now Maggie, I'll be watching you too, in case God is busy creating tornadoes or not existing.

Homer

[to Maggie] Now you learn your numbers from these billiard balls while daddy gets happier and happier and then sadder and sadder.

Homer

Sounds like someone's got a case of the Mondays.

Homer

I'm sorry, Moe. I didn't mean everybody everybody, hope you don't mind.