Joel Robinson quotes from Mystery Science Theater 3000

[Ulysses shoots down a quail.]

[Our narrator, Police Lt. Chasen, wonders who could possibly believe a dead man could come back to life.]

Joel

Only millions of Christians.

[The Moon Men unleash rock monsters.]

Joel

It's the Monsters of Rock Tour!

[The knights face an ogre.]

Joel

Teddy Ruxpin, no!

[the specter-like robot Timmy has trapped Servo in a cocoon on the bridge, while Joel arrives with a broom to hold Timmy back as he attacks Crow]

Joel

Let go of him, you bitch!

[An acrobat bicycles on a tightrope, balancing more acrobats on his balance rod and shoulders.]

Joel

Boy, they're sure tough on drunk drivers in Canada.

When you see pink,

You're gonna think,

"We're doomed".

They are agents of Satan...

Joel

[laughing] Okay, stop it, Tom...

[The credits mention that the film's music was performed by a group called The Other Three; part of the credit is cut off by the side of the screen.]

Joel

[reading] The Other Th?

[Dr. Logan just gets through talking on the phone and he looks distraught]

[Joel tries to organize the Bots for a photo.]

Joel

We are going to get a nice picture of this family if it kills us.

Here Comes the Circus (short)

[Over the "The End" card]

Joel

Ah, my favorite part of the circus.

The Day the Earth Froze (movie)

[The villagers continue to celebrate in front of their cabins.]

Joel

What is this, "Stalag 17: The Musical?"

[While on a test drive, the film cuts suddenly to show the salesman and customer have switched places.]

Joel

Zintar gets the most sales because he's a shapeshifter!

[Another clean-cut salesman in a three-piece suit talks to Mr. Warren.]

Manos: The Hands of Fate (movie)