[As Dr. Erickson looks out over the beach, large flipper-like footprints appear mysteriously in the sand.]
[gasps] Donald Duck has the Ring of Power!
...
CCrow
Frodo goes snorkling!
Crow T. Robot
Mystery Science Theater 3000 · 3,167 quotes
Most-quoted character in Mystery Science Theater 3000: in 1,660 of its 3,167 quotes
Most scenes with: Tom Servo (818), Mike Nelson (376), Joel Robinson (271)
Scenes with Crow T. Robot 1,239
[To keep the Observers at bay so Pearl and Bobo can escape, the Nanites place a Number 7 move on the planet below]
Say, what's a Number 7? [the planet explodes]
Mike, you blew up another planet! What is your deal?
I just told them to take care of a little problem!
CCrow
And they did! Here comes Mike- Destroyer of Worlds!
Oh God of Fire and Vengeance... stay away from me!
[The creature has just mortally attacked Lombardi as blank-faced Dr. Erickson looks on:]
MAMike [as Erickson]
Well, mmm, gosh, I, mmm... Hmm. Uh...
...
[Erickson continues to emote incomprehensibly:]
CCrow
Fear? Elation? What is it?
...
CCrow
Despair? Love? Joy? Tell us!
...
CCrow
Concern? Passion? Hunger? What, Lance?
...
CCrow
Ennui? Angst? Apathy? Gas?
...
Cold? Jubilant? Headache-y?
His emotional memory is the previous scene.
[Leaving the party, first victim Frank walks home through the woods.]
MAMike [as Frank]
[muttering] "I'm okay. I don't need a ride." What was I thinking? It's like 47 miles!
CACrow [as Frank]
I'm probably pretty tasty and well-marbled--not something I've often thought of.
. . .
I was a Teenage Werewolf Snack.
[Tony has finished yelling at Arlene for asking an innocent question]
MAMike [as Arlene]
...and I like you because...?
TTony
I'm sorry, Arlene. I don't know why I act like this.
CACrow [as Arlene]
Because you're a jerk?
[Dan walks out of his "lady friend" Olga's house before she stops him.]
OOlga
Wait, you forgot your back brace.
[Mike and the 'bots all react with utter revulsion as Kester drops his pants, exposing red long underwear.]
Ugh, he's pink!
I don't know how, but I think I just became sterile!
CCrow
[cheering] Go spiders! Go spiders! Go go spiders!
[The scene opens in Ev and Dan's pitch-black kitchen at night.]
Actually filmed inside the thumbhole of a bowling ball.
. . .
[Later in that scene, Dan begins chasing sister-in-law Terri around the kitchen table after threatening to spank her.]
And the movie ramps up the revulsion!
CCrow
This movie hates us, doesn't it?
[Dan is trying to find out if the stones he found are diamonds]
EEv
Diamonds are supposed to cut glass.
CCrow
Yeah, they're supposed to, but they're too damn lazy!
DDan
[walks toward window]
Too bad all their windows are made of plastic wrap and duct tape!
[Dan scratches a crude "$" into the window]
CACrow [as Dan]
...Aryan...Nation...rules...
DDan
[excited] Will you look at that!?
MAMike [as Dan]
[excited] I made a [sic] "R"!
[Ev opens a dresser drawer and an assortment of puppet spiders pop their legs out of the drawer.]
MAMike [as Spiders]
We're your dirty socks! Wash us!
CCrow
Giant Puppet Invasion!
[A restless mob begins to form with the intent of taking out the giant spider.]
CACrow [as a mob member]
Free Bobby Seale!
SAServo [as a mob member]
Free Mumia!
MAMike [as a mob member]
Free beer!
[Clones Lena and Richard chat by a campfire.]
LLena
I like it. It gives me time to write.
Write?
LLena
Yeah, I write my thoughts and my ideas.
CACrow [as Lena]
I've already filled a Post-it note.
[Clone Richard searches through some top-secret files.]
MAMike [as Richard/Winston Smith]
Whaddya know -- we aren't at war with Eurasia!
. . .
[Richard reads a file written in a careful, round cursive.]
CCrow
Thanks to Miss Taylor's fourth-grade class for transcribing our secret clone notes!
. . .
MAMike [as Richard]
Black helicopter… Roswell… Area 51… Waco… formula for Coca-Cola…
[Rick Knight confronts his brother Jeff about an incriminating videotape.]
RRick
You knew about the tape, didn't you?
JJeff
Yeah. You saw the tape?
RRick
Yeah, and it's scary.
CACrow [as Rick]
Adam Sandler's in it.
[The crowd cheers wildly at Senator Knight's campaign rally.]
Hooray for the '70s!
CCrow
Shaun Cassidy for President!
We want Billy Beer!
JJake
This place you keep talking about, Clonus...
SAServo [as Jake]
Is there a bar?
. . .
JJake
Professor, you know that tape will blow the lid off of everything?
CACrow [as Jake]
Speaking of, where's the bathroom?
More Mystery Science Theater 3000 characters
All Mystery Science Theater 3000 quotes →
Tom ServoKevin Murphy · 1,542 quotes
Mike NelsonMichael J. Nelson · 824 quotes
Joel RobinsonJoel Hodgson · 542 quotes
NNarrator224 quotes
JJonah171 quotes
GGypsy75 quotes
EEmily69 quotes
CFDr. Clayton Forrester57 quotes
PFPearl Forrester26 quotes
MMax22 quotes
KFKinga Forrester21 quotes
JPJack Perkins20 quotes
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