Tony quotes from Mystery Science Theater 3000 ... TV Quotes Database

[Tony has finished yelling at Arlene for asking an innocent question]

MAMike [as Arlene]

...and I like you because...?

TTony

I'm sorry, Arlene. I don't know why I act like this.

CACrow [as Arlene]

Because you're a jerk?

S8 I Was a Teenage Werewolf

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[as Tony and Mark drive through the mysterious town]

MMark

Never seen such mixed up architecture. It almost looks like the backside of a movie lot.

TTony

That's it! A movie lot, big deal.

MMark

Yeah, of course.

CACrow [as Mark]

That explains everything.

MMark

The people in the costumes, the... the cables coming from underneath the lampposts...

SAServo [as Mark]

This guy who keeps yelling at me to act better.

MMark

But I don't see any- any cameras, Tony.

TTony

Friend, all I want is the exit.

JAJoel [as Tony]

One of these warp pipes should get us out of here.

...

TTony

Ah, to hell with it, all I want's my plane.

Servo

All I want's the end credits.

S13 The Bubble

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[Integrating an alien power supply into their Eagle, Tony, reading some instructions, counts off numbers to Commander Koenig.]

TTony

1... 2...

SAServo [as Tony]

3...

TTony

5...

JCJoel, Crow, Servo

What?!

TTony

6...

Joel

That's why they're in such trouble.

TTony

7... 4.

CCrow

Well, they are British.

Cosmic Princess

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[Tony seeks information from girlfriend Jane, who's wearing a black-leather catsuit with matching WWI-vintage strap-on pilot's headgear.]

JJane

I'm conditioned to keep the secret, just like everyone. I can't do it.

TTony

Try! Fight him! Fight him with your will!

MAMike [as Jane]

But my will won't!

JJane

I-- I-- I can't! He's commanding me from a distance.

Servo

Amelia Airhead.

Puma Man

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Tony quotes from Mystery Science Theater 3000

Scenes with Tony 4

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