Scenes with Sharona Fleming 108
[Stottlemeyer and Disher arrive at Sharona's house]
Why don't you stay back, sir? I can handle this.
Oh, you can? Since when? [Sharona opens the door]
Sharona FlemingHey.
Sharona, we need to talk.
Sharona Fleming
About what?
I think you know. [They walk into the house, which looks like it has been hit by an earthquake] What happened here? Did you have a party?
Sharona Fleming
It's Benjy. He never picks anything up.
Sharona Fleming
What are you talking about?
We're gonna find him. Is he here?
[Randy takes out his gun and begins going from room to room]
Sharona Fleming
Hey, would you put that away?! This is my house!
Sharona Fleming
No he hasn't!
Sharona, we know that you took him. Now either you tell us where he is or I'm going to have to take you in. That is the law.
[walks back out of the living room, speaking into his walkie-talkie] Living room secure, heading to the kitchen.
Randy, you don't have to use the walkie-talkie. I'm ten feet away.
[puts down the walkie-talkie and continues searching]
[notices some vomit on a wall, and a lot of crooked pictures] Hey, what happened here?
Sharona Fleming
Benjy threw up.
[incredulously] On the wall?
Sharona Fleming
It was pretty awful.
[heads into the kitchen, and opens the closet, which swings open to reveal a stuffed teddy bear] Monkey! Monkey! Monkey! False alarm! False alarm!
[Sharona grabs the teddy bear from Randy]
Sharona, you were seen. The animal shelter has a surveillance camera. It recorded your car's license plate number as you drove away.
Sharona, you were seen. The animal shelter has a surveillance camera. It recorded your car's license plate number as you drove away.
Sharona
They were gonna kill him!
Are you going to tell me where he is?
Sharona
I can't.
Then I have to arrest you. [To Randy] Go ahead.
You have the right to remain silent, anything you say...
Sharona
Oh, Randy, gimme a break!
Damn it, Sharona, you're under arrest. Just turn around.
[As he reluctantly handcuffs her, Benjy comes home from school]
Uh... your mom bet Randy that she could get out of his handcuffs, and she couldn't. [To Randy] So, take them off... take 'em off.
[Ignoring Stottlemeyer's attempts to cover for her, Sharona walks over to Benjy, still handcuffed]
Sharona
Benjy, you were right.
Sharona
About standing up for that little boy in school. You did the right thing. So now I'm standing up for somebody who can't protect himself.
Sharona
Yeah. Look, everything's going to be okay, all right? Captain Stottlemeyer's going to take you to Aunt Gail's... [Benjy glances at Stottlemeyer, who nods] ... and you tell her to call Adrian. He'll know what to do... after I tell him.
[During a blackout]
Sharona
Benjy, hold his hand.
Sharona
Let him squeeze it.
Sharona
Adrian, calm down, they're working on it now, it won't be long.
Sharona
I'm telling you, I don't know, they're working on it.
[The lights come back on]
Sharona
See? I told you.
I didn't know when it would be over.
Sharona
So I heard.
[Monk, Sharona, Stottlemeyer and Disher arrive at a construction site to talk to tree-hugger Alby Drake]
ADAlby Drake
No I'm not being reasonable, I'm sick and tired of being reasonable. I'm not coming down until you agree to build your stupid condos somewhere else!
[Monk and Sharona arrive]
Sharona Fleming
Did you call Michelle?
Sharona Fleming
Did you think about it?
Sharona Fleming
Did you think about thinking about it?
Sharona, I'm a married man.
Sharona Fleming
Captain, Lieutenant.
Sharona Fleming
What's going on?
His name is Alby Drake. He was Winston Brenner's oldest friend; they were roommates at MIT.
How long has he been up there?
CFConstruction Foreman
Ten days. He'll be down soon. The judge will be ordering an eviction notice by tomorrow morning.
The FBI, in their infinite wisdom, now agrees that Winston Brenner may have faked his own death back in 1995. If Brenner is still alive, [points a bullhorn up at Drake] that scruffy bird up there might still be in contact with him.
Sharona Fleming
How does he go to the bathroom? [Almost immediately, everyone except for Randy steps back]
[Monk has a date with Michelle Rivas]
Sharona Fleming
Are you excited?
Yes... if by excited, you mean petrified and full of regret.
Sharona Fleming
"Petrified and full of regret". Welcome to the world of dating.
[They walk around the remains of Alby Drake's tree to meet Stottlemeyer, who climbs over one of the fallen branches to meet them]
Monk. Sharona. I'm sure you've noticed by now that there used to be a big tree standing right over there.
4:35 AM. A security guard heard somebody start up the bulldozer. Moments later, ch-ch-ch, "Timber!" Drake was dead on impact.
He made a phone call though at around midnight.
You guessed it: Palo Alto.
Sharona Fleming
Oh, well it had to be to Brenner. He's the guy.
So not only is Winston Brenner alive and well, he's making sure that his old pals don't rat him out.
That's right. The FBI's calling at Palo Alto tonight. They want to compare notes; synchronize watches.
Ouch, whoa-whoa, I-I can't make it.
Sharona Fleming
He has a date.
[Sharona is confused about Monk's near-catatonia after he lands a magazine job on his first interview.]
Sharona
What's the problem? It's a great job!
I had a great job. I-I was a cop, that's all I ever wanted to be. I couldn't fix the whole world, I knew that. But I could fix... little pieces of it, one little piece at a time. Put things back together. Sharona, I-I need it. I miss it, I-I miss it so much...
Sharona
Hey, hey. I miss it too.
Sharona
What are you doing?
Sharona
That's not a jig.
Sharona
I don't know, I don't want to know.
[Sharona has her car in the shop for repairs.]
Tell him about that noise your radio keeps making.
Sharona Fleming
That's my music.
[FBI agent Colmes wants Monk to wear a wire into a meeting with mob kingpin Salvatore Lucarelli]
Okay, okay. Here's the thing: I can't have anything taped to my chest.
Ah, that's fine. Come here, I'll... let me show you this. Ah, you see, these days... [pulls out a piece of paper] We can put a transmitter just about anywhere on the human body. You have six options.
[Monk and Sharona examine the list, with Disher and Stottlemeyer looking over their shoulders.]
Number One... is out. Number Two... uh, you-you wouldn't actually shave me there, would you? [Colmes nods.] Okay... no thank you. Number Three...
Sharona Fleming
What if you had to sit down?
Right. Good point. Number Four... [slowly looks up at Colmes, then turns to Sharona] Even if I die, don't let them do Number Four.
I'll do... okay. I'll do it. I'll try that.
Sharona Fleming
That's only for women!
Oh, yeah. Ah, Number Six... Number Six. I'll... I can do that.
[Mob "associate" Vince insists on guarding Monk and Sharona.]
VVince
Uncle Sal told me [to] keep an eye on you. It's for your own protection.
It's a little insulting. I haven't needed a babysitter since I was nineteen.
Sharona Fleming
You had a babysitter when you were nineteen?
Everyone did. It was the seventies; it was a crazy time.
[Stottlemeyer and Disher find Monk and Sharona at the FBI's post]
Hey! I showed them my ID downstairs. I just got to talk to my friend! What, you reaching for your gun? If you're reaching for your gun, you'd better pull it. Stand aside. [to Monk] Monk. [to Colmes] Colmes! Whaddaya think you're doing?!
This is a federal operation, Captain. You have no business being here.
Well, neither does he! What's going on?
Sharona Fleming
They want Adrian to go undercover in the Lucarelli family. [Randy looks at a surveillance photo of Sharona speaking with Fat Tony outside Salvatore's restaurant]
What's up with this picture of you and Fat Tony?
Sharona Fleming
Nothing! And don't call him that!
What? Are you defending him?
Why don't you start by telling them, what happened to the last agent that tried to infiltrate the family? Oh, start by telling them where we found the body buried!
Sharona Fleming
Whoa, whoa, whoa, wait. Buried?
Actually the parts that they found.
Okay, that's a different situation. That agent's cover was blown. Monk's been invited in. They already know that he's a cop.
[Sharona thinks she is losing her sanity like her father, and believes it's due to the stress of taking care of Monk. She is at Dr. Kroger's office.]
Sharona
I swear to God, if I have a breakdown, I'll never forgive him.
Sharona
Adrian.
[Sharona, Disher, Monk, and Stottlemeyer are in a "Mega-Mart" warehouse.]
Sharona Fleming
Tired?
I was up all night with my girlfriend.
Sharona Fleming
Yeah, those imaginary girlfriends can be pretty wild.
Sharona Fleming
[sarcastically] Really? What's her name?
Sharona Fleming
[sees box labeled "Crystal Glassware"] What's her last name? Glassware?
Sharona Fleming
You have a picture?
[Takes picture from wallet, gives picture to Sharona]
Sharona Fleming
Oh, she's pretty. [Turns over picture] Randy, this came with the wallet!
Yeah, I know. She's a wallet model.
Sharona Fleming
That's sad.
Sharona, she's one of the world's top five wallet models! Thank you very much.
[Monk is late for dinner]
Sharona
So where is he, anyway?
Last I saw, he was putting away boxes in the shoe department.
Sharona
He's putting boxes away?
Sharona
Oh, God. Maybe we'd better go ahead and start ordering now, you know?
Sharona
I am your nurse! Why didn't you tell me?
Because I knew you'd bring me down! You're bringing the Monk down, man.
Monk · 667 quotes
