BBenjy
[about Monk] Can I bring him to school? Like, for show and tell?
Benjy Fleming
Monk · 667 quotes
Tied for 9th most-quoted character in Monk: in 12 of its 667 quotes
Most scenes with: Adrian Monk (9), Sharona Fleming (5)
Lines by Benjy Fleming 1
Scenes with Benjy Fleming 11
[Monk and Benjy observe Sharona losing to a handsome acquaintance at tennis.]
BBenjy
Mom coulda got that shot. You think she's letting him win?
I wouldn't be surprised.
BBenjy
You know, why do girls do that?
Someday you'll understand. [pauses] When you do, call me and explain it to me.
Okay, just for the record, what we just did...
BFBenjy Fleming
Breaking and entering?
Yeah... it's wrong. Don't-don't do it.
[Monk, with Benjy tagging along, checks out the maids' locker room.]
BFBenjy Fleming
Think the dead body's in here?
Maybe. It's been everywhere else.
[The earthquake prevents Sharona and Benjy from returning to their home.]
Well, we can always stay at Aunt Gail's.
BBenjy
Why can't we stay at Mr. Monk's?
Because I will go crazy slower at Aunt Gail's.
[Benjy turns on the tap and rusty colored water comes out]
BFBenjy Fleming
The water's all rusty!
Oh yeah, it always gets like that after an earthquake. Fortunately, I always keep some mineral water around for situations like this... Where's my water?
[She opens the cupboard under the sink, which is empty. Cuts to the bathroom, where Monk is soaking in the tub, surrounded by empty plastic bottles.]
[banging on the door] Mr. Monk?
Don't come in, I'm taking a bath.
With my mineral water?!
I tried the water from the tap, it was a little rusty.
Yeah well, enjoy that bath, it's costing me $95 dollars!
[oblivious to her sarcasm] Thank you!
[Monk wants to go home a few minutes after they arrived]
Oh, just suck it up.
I don't think it's my turn to suck it up, I think it's your turn to suck it up.
BFBenjy Fleming
Hey, why don't you both suck it up?
Excuse me! Do you kiss your mother with that mouth?
BFBenjy Fleming
No.
Well, you should. Come here.
[Monk is patching up Benjy after he got into a fight at school.]
What's a wedgie?
BFBenjy Fleming
It's when you pull a kid's underwear all the way out of his pants.
When I was a kid they called it something else.
BFBenjy Fleming
What?
An "Adrian."
Uh-oh...
BFBenjy Fleming
What?
The Band-Aid.
BFBenjy Fleming
It's okay, it doesn't have to be perf- [Monk rips it off] OW!
Now Benjy, you're grounded! That means no TV, and no Playstation!
BFBenjy Fleming
Mom!
Sharona, he was just sticking up for a friend.
Adrian, you stay out of this! You're not his father!
That's true, but I care about him as much as any father.
[He rips off the Band-Aid again.]
BFBenjy Fleming
OW!
Sharona, you were seen. The animal shelter has a surveillance camera. It recorded your car's license plate number as you drove away.
They were gonna kill him!
Are you going to tell me where he is?
I can't.
Then I have to arrest you. [To Randy] Go ahead.
You have the right to remain silent, anything you say...
Oh, Randy, gimme a break!
Damn it, Sharona, you're under arrest. Just turn around.
[As he reluctantly handcuffs her, Benjy comes home from school]
BBenjy
Mom?
Benjy, hey!
BBenjy
What are you doing?
Uh... your mom bet Randy that she could get out of his handcuffs, and she couldn't. [To Randy] So, take them off... take 'em off.
[Ignoring Stottlemeyer's attempts to cover for her, Sharona walks over to Benjy, still handcuffed]
Benjy, you were right.
BBenjy
About what?
About standing up for that little boy in school. You did the right thing. So now I'm standing up for somebody who can't protect himself.
BBenjy
You mean Darwin?
Yeah. Look, everything's going to be okay, all right? Captain Stottlemeyer's going to take you to Aunt Gail's... [Benjy glances at Stottlemeyer, who nods] ... and you tell her to call Adrian. He'll know what to do... after I tell him.
[During a blackout]
[groans]
Benjy, hold his hand.
BBenjy
Ow! He's squeezing it!
Let him squeeze it.
When will it be over?
Adrian, calm down, they're working on it now, it won't be long.
When will it be over?
I'm telling you, I don't know, they're working on it.
When will it be over?!
BBenjy
Make him stop!
[The lights come back on]
See? I told you.
I didn't know when it would be over.
So I heard.
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These quotes come from Wikiquote's Monk pages and are available under the Creative Commons Attribution-ShareAlike License.