Peg quotes from Married... with Children

Peg

It's not every year Kelly gets promoted to the next grade.

Peg

Look at them over there. Men are such idiots. And I married their king.

Peg

To tell you the truth, I never understood the fascination with Barbie. (suggestively): But I sure could strip Ken with my teeth.

Peg

[awakens from her sugar coma] Mom, I had the most horrible dream: I was married to a shoe salesman.

Peg

There are two things Peggy Bundy doesn't do. Number one: cook, clean, sew, vacuum, iron and parent. And number two: exercise.

Peg

Isn't this great? Wish it could always be like this. No noses to wipe. No tears to dry. No one to send to their room. It's just so nice without Al.

Peg

Okay, great. Now, who's got change for a dollar? I wanna cash Al's paycheck. (everyone laughs)

Peg

Oh, Kelly. Just do what I did when I was your age: push your way to the road manager and tell him, "It's worth letting me in. Ask anybody." And, if anyone touches you, scream, "Jailbait!"

Peg

Well, kids, we have no more credit cards. Let this be a lesson to ya: Marry someone who can afford you.

Peg

Oh, Al, you fell.

Peg

Gee, that's nice. Well, Al. Maybe now you can take down that bumper sticker that says, "Support Higher Education: Send a Cop to First Grade."

Peg

[reading TV Guide Fall Preview issue]. We Are Fami-Lee. A Chinese family with three children. [pause] Ohh! I get it! We Are Fami-Lee!

Peg

Listen, Al. You suffered a head injury today. You're probably seriously hurt and require immediate medical attention. Now go to sleep.

Peg

We're Bundys. We don't call the cops. People call them on us!

Peg

I sure hope Al does not wise up to the fact that is he is legally entitled to half his money.