Look at them over there. Men are such idiots. And I married their king.
“Guys and Dolls” · Season 2, Episode 14
In this episode: Peg (5), Bud Bundy (2), Al Bundy (1), Kelly Bundy (1), Marcy Rhoades-D'Arcy (1)
Greatest hobby in the world and women just don't get it.
No, what I just don't get is sex.
That'll be Bud's new hobby.
Sex?
No! Baseball cards.
What's wrong, Kel? Are the contractions coming five minutes apart?
What's wrong, Bud? Puberty five years away?
I hate men. They're stupid, ignorant animals with stupid ignorant hobbies. And they hated me. But I didn't need them. I had Barbie.
Peg (nostalgic): And I had a very special bathtub toy. (beat): Who's Barbie?
Who's Barbie? America's favorite teenage fashion model, that's who.
Oh, you mean a Barbie doll. Yeah, I had one of those. I gave one to my boyfriend Keith as a symbol of our love. He was gay as a debutante, you know.
To tell you the truth, I never understood the fascination with Barbie. (suggestively): But I sure could strip Ken with my teeth.
Kelly's not the problem, Bud. She has moved up to a good, solid "D." Now, you're the one who's in trouble. We went to your school and saw your social studies report. You know, "Brazil: Land of Rubber and Sunshine"? (holds up a poster-sized photo of Kelly watering the backyard in a bikini with the word "Brazil" posted over it and a paper cutout sun): Would you care to explain this picture of your sister in a bikini?
Well, it illustrates the easy sex in Brazil. So, how'd I do?
Much like your father in life, you failed.
These quotes come from Wikiquote's Married... with Children pages and are available under the Creative Commons Attribution-ShareAlike License.





