Gordon quotes from Hell's Kitchen

Right, Bret...

Yes, chef?

...and Milly, take over the fish!

Yes, chef!

Four minutes, two pork; four and a half minutes, two wellington!

Got it, let's go! We gotta finish this!! (interview) Chef Ramsay's pissed. We have to turn it back around! I'm not losing. I do not want to lose.

(to Nick) What's going, Nick?! Nick, what's going?!

Uh... two salmon, two halibut! Two pork, two wellington!

[shakes his head] Two pork, two salmon followed by two salmon, two wellington!

Heard, chef!

There's no halibut going! [to Josh] What's going, Josh?

Two salmon and...two lamb?

Enough's enough! I have never seen a team so fragmented in all my fucking life! You, you, you, you, you, and you fuck off!

Yes, chef.

James, you and I will finish them. (o blue team) GET OUT!

Yes, chef.

Fuck!

GET OUT!

Un-fucking-believable.

Come on, man! (interview) I feel disrespected, I don't understand it! I ain't never been kicked out of a kitchen in my life!

(to Gordon) Chef, Table 22. They found this on the salad of the scallops. It's a plastic.

Hey. Hey, Blue team!

(interview) Something happened. I hope I didn't do it.

[holds up plastic strip] That was in the scallop salad.

What the fuck?! Come on, fellas!

Who dressed it?

I did, chef. (interview) But as it turns out, I did. (to Gordon) I apologize.

You're gonna slice somebody's throat open!

Understandable. (interview) Fuck! Another fuckin' dumb, little mistake.

It's just so fucking basic! So basic!

Michael, what the fuck are you doing?

Fucking Jesus. Michael! [puts pan back on the stove] What are you doing?

Chef, I put it away, chef.

What?

It was over here burning, chef.

But why stick it down there?! Whose tray is that?

It's, uh, salmon, chef.

Fish (station).

They're talking, they go down and grab the pan, they're gonna scald themselves!

Yes, chef. You're right, chef.

Then why would you put–[backs away while Michael reaches to grab the pan]

Sorry, chef.

What are you doing?!

It was over here burning.

Shut up! CAN YOU WAIT UNTIL I FUCKING FINISH?!

(interview) I put the pan out of the way just so that nobody would get hurt.

If the pan's about to burst into flames, what do you do?!

I'm sorry, chef!

(to Bret) Come on young man!

(interview) Myself and Josh on the fish station could've had to leave Hell's Kitchen because of a third-degree burn. Like "taking skin from your ass to put it on your hand" type shit.

[puts pan in the sink] Fucking hell!

LADIES!

Yes, chef! Monique, just throw it up.

I wanted to make sure it was ready. [to Gordon] Walking with scallops! (interview) I know I'm solid on my scallops. This ain't my first time in the kitchen!

[while checking the scallops] These are fucking disgusting. They're just cooked to fuck. [to red team] Ladies!

Yes, chef!

Come here! All of you. WHAT IS HAPPENING?! TOUCH THEM! Just touch how rubber they are! Yeah, it's not gonna bite! It's fucking dead!

Yes, chef.

Alison, who cooked those scallops?

[brief pause] Monique, chef.

(interview) Like, what a bitch move! I can't stand Alison. You accent's stupid, your makeup's stupid, you're stupid.

(to Monique) You've got no idea they're rubber! Way overcooked!

Yes, chef.

Start again!

(to Red team) Hey. Hey, all of you! Come here!

Yes, chef!

Come here!

Yes, chef.

Tasting Lesson #17. Taste the sticky, over-reduced cavatelli and the bland risotto! No richness, no sumptuousness. Nothing! I have no idea what you two are doing!

(interview) I didn't fucking train for ten years to have some fucking asshole next to me not keep up with risotto.

Hey, here's what happening! It's the last table of appetizers...

Yes, chef.

...when you should be at your height! And that tastes like it's at the fucking bottom.

Yes, chef.

Yeah, disgusting. Sticky, bland...

Can you just please–

Sorry?!

[beat] I'm sorry, chef.

No, what were you gonna say?

Please let us try again.

"Let us try again?"

(interview) "Oh, please Chef Ramsay. Can you give me another chance?" Seriously?! "I'm a girl in puppy-dog eyes." That shit doesn't fucking fly. Are you kidding me?!

The last table of appetizers. "Let us try again." What do you think I want? All of you, GET OUT!

(interview) Dumbass!

FUCK OFF! And what did you say, Sarah? "Can we try one more time?!" GET OUT!

(interview) I'm so angry. I literally want to start punching bitches.

(imitates Sarah) "CAN WE TRY ONE MORE TIME?!"

One wellington, one lamb!

Yes, chef!

The lamb's under.

Close it up and get back in for a minute.

Alright. Mike, we'll give it a second, okay?

Right now?

No, like, I need a minute. Okay?

Extra minute heard.

Yes, thank you!

Walking with garnish!

Michael. I said a minute! (interview) I'd rather have Chef Ramsay yell at me for taking too long than have him yell at me for sending him undercooked lamb. (to Brendan) Brendan, bring it up.

Hey, the lamb's full of blood. All of you, come here. Who donkeyed that?

I sliced the lamb first, chef.

And what did you tell yourself?

It was a little under, chef.

No, it's a lot more than a little! [cuts into the lamb] Raw white fat. [slams fist onto the plate]

(interview; sighs) Fuck!

Fuck off, all of you! GET OUT! Shit beginning, shit middle, and a shit end!

(interview) I'm a little furious right now. I hate fucking losing and getting kicked out of the kitchen.

Get out, get out, get out! GET OUT!!

Oh my God. Fuck me. (to red team) Hey, all of you.

Yes, chef!

Come here. Yeah, HURRY UP! Taste that!

Where's the spoon?

Taste that.

Oh my God. It's salty.

That is disgusting!

Yes, chef.

Who made that?! Who fucking made that?!

I put the extra salt in at the end, chef. I'll fix it though!

Michelle, there are young children!

Got it, chef!

(interview) I don't mind taking control of situations, especially if I feel like I have a handle on it. I got this shit! I got this!

Two risotto!

Stop. Stop! (to Bret) Come here! Bring that fucking pan and bring that pan here! All of you, come here!

Yes, chef.

That's the old risotto that's gone three, four minutes ago dumped into the fresh one.

Yes, it's both, chef.

What in the fuck are we doing?!

(interview) Now we're in trouble.

Cut the bullshit! [slams fist onto table] COME ON, GUYS!

Yes, chef!

(interview) Bret used the old risotto into the new risotto, and you never do that! You can't do that!

My fault, my fault, MY FAULT!

It's alright, man.

How dare I do that! How the fuck dare I do that!

(interview) He likes to think of himself as our quarterback, but a proper quarterback wins, you know?

(to the red team) All of you. All of you! There's the last New York strip. Look how well done it is. It's just so basic!

(interview) You have an idiot and a clown on the meat station, and they're just fucking everything up.

Is anyone going to step up and say anything?! This is an embarrassment! [throws meat onto the table] Get out! GET OUT!!

Go, go!

(interview) This is a complete, epic shitshow!

Is that raw?

Yeah.

Hey, ladies! Come here! Who cooked the burger? Burger's still raw. [pause] Whilst you stare at your raw burger, and I re-fire that table myself, I suggest you come up with two nominees that you do not want on your brigade. Fuck off!

(interview) There were little kids out there. It pisses me off completely! There were families out there. Families. Simply atrocious! Shame on the red team!

You didn't go with truffle butter yet, right, Josh?

No, I did truffle butter! You're putting too much butter!

I didn't put butter in it!

You put a lot of butter. (interview) Adam's struggling on the risotto. He's very confused.

Risotto's up, ready to go whenever you guys are good!

You gotta get these hotter! You gotta let this reduce! (interview) Adam, come on, man. It's simple mistakes! What's going on, are you sleeping? Wake up for me!

Where's the risotto?

It's coming right up, chef.

Go, go! This way!

[brings risotto to the pass] Here you go.

Hey, look at my risotto. [holds pan up to show the risotto stuck to the bottom] Look, just stuck! Hey, it's glue! Glue!

I'll put it back, chef!

(interview) Adam better tighten the fuck up. If you can't cook the risotto, you have no reason being in Hell's Kitchen.

Look at it! It's like a fucking clock! What am I supposed to do, hang it on the wall?!

No, chef!

No!

A risotto clock, Joshua?!

I'm sorry, chef!

That was me! That was me, chef!

With Bret's soggy salmon killing the blue team's momentum, over in the red kitchen...

Monique! You have to get all that done! Can you do it?!

I'm working it right now. I'm ready.

...Monique's struggles on garnish has the ladies' first order of wellingtons and lamb dying at the pass.

Let's go, Mo!

Yes, chef! Lamb garnish!

Have you tasted any of your garnish?

Yes, chef. I've been tasting.

[to Gordon as he checks the garnish] You all right with that?

[touches eggplant] It's fucking raw. (to red team) Hey! There's nothing worse than a bitter, raw eggplant, yeah? It's just solid! Just...[slams fist on table] it's just solid! Look!

Yes, chef.

Oh, yes. Oh y–Oh, YES?! OH, NO! IS ANYONE ENGAGING?!

YES, CHEF!

DRIVE HER THEN!

[holds a salmon brought by Christine] Oh my God. Wait, wait. Wait! All of you!

Yes, chef!

Get your arses over here!

Shit!

Chef, what's wrong?

Undercooked rice. But here's the insult–I got raw salmon as well! It's fucking raw, it's not even pink!! Hey. Hey, all of you, come here! Come here.

(interview) Like, seriously? Oh my God. I can't believe–I... [sighs]

What is going on?! That risotto was disgusting. Those salmon were raw. Who cooked that salmon, first off?!

I cooked the salmon, chef. I lost my train of thought, I should've just focused!

I swear to God, the next mistake, you're out of here.

Yes, chef.

Get it together, now!

How long?

Five minutes, chef.

What?!

I just have to put it out right, chef. I'm sorry. (interview) Lamb takes fifteen minutes, start to finish. So we're just fucking waiting. We're waiting and waiting.

How long on the lambs?

This fucking lamb's still not cooked! STILL NOT COOKED!

Come on! Fuck.

How long, two chicken, two lamb?

How long, Brendan?

Two minutes, chef.

STILL TWO MINUTES?!

No. It's one–one minute out.

A minute?! Brendan!

Garnish, Milly, to the window!

Yes, chef.

Milly, I need you to wait another minute. I–I'm sorry. The lamb's just–it's not cooked yet.

So then don't tell us two minutes! Tell us four minutes! Don't lie to us! Don't lie to chef!

Brendan!

Yes, chef.

Did you just shut down the kitchen? Now we look like fucking idiots! I asked for one of you, two of you, three of you to start showing some leadership qualities! NO ONE'S STEPPING UP! WAKE UP!

Yes, chef!

Two risotto walking in one minute!

I need a minute and a half!

Okay, Roger! Copy! One minute and a half on the scallops!

Scallops are not fucking cooking!!

(interview) I'm trying to put risotto out, but scallops was just not going anywhere. (to Nick) How long out on the scallops?

I already told you! ONE MINUTE!

Okay. Ready, walk risotto.

If I hear him say "risotto" one more time, I'm gonna cut my own dick off.

Come on, Nick! I need to plate the scallops!

Walking! Two scallops, chef.

[checks scallops] Scallops are overcooked. Fucking hell. They're rubber. [to blue team] Hey! Hey, hey! All of you, come here. Just touch them, how overcooked they are! We're waiting for them, yet they're overcooked! I don't get that!

Yes, chef.

Come on, guys.

Fucking hell!

We're gonna go with two more halibut in that pan.

No, they're right here. You only need four there, right? You have two there already done. (interview) Brendan and I are just cooking fish. It's a fucking free-for-all of fish! Fish everywhere! And they're all cooked improperly!

(to Brendan) Hey, can you have two halibut? How long? [pause] Can you just give me something, Brendan? Just something.

Guys, I need fucking help here!

It's falling apart!

(to Nick) No, you gotta help him! He's your partner!

I'm trying to!

So talk to him!

I–I am!

We have to talk to him! It's a team effort!

I'm walking with two halibut!

Fucking lamb, behind!

[checks center of the halibut] Fucking hell. Hey, hey, hey.

Oh my God. Fuck my life.

All of you, come here. I'm gonna go fucking crazy. [separates fish with spatula] Raw. Raw, raw.

(interview) Brendan could not get it in the middle. Either it was overcooked or it was raw. Stop somewhere in the fucking middle and you'll be right!

What is this? [points at Nick and Brendan] You and you, fuck off! GET OUT! Milly, Bret get on fish!