[Johnny watches himself jump in a distorting mirror.]
Afterwards, Johnny can't stop going up and down.
CACrow [as Narrator]
The drugs from the Chemical Wonderland start to kick in.
S4The Rebel Set
[Johnny spots a flying helicopter.]
"Oh, boy. A heel-a-copter airplane!"
What?
"Jiminy," thinks Johnny, "if only I could get a ride in one of those."
SAServo [as Narrator]
Visions of the Mekong Delta flash before Johnny's eyes.
[Champion figure skater Barbara Ann Scott gives Johnny a peck on the cheek. Embarrassed, he puts his head on her chest.]
CACrow [as Narrator]
"Jiminy," thinks Johnny, "if only I could get a ride in one of those."
Johnny does find a real aeroplane… and gets his ride.
SAServo [as Narrator]
Johnny thinks Amelia Earhart seems like a nice lady.
The Rebel Set (movie)
[in terror as Joel reads Life's Little Instruction Book to him and Crow] The humor; the humor!
[slowly] "A train leaves a station at 2PM, going 90 miles an hour. Another train leaves another station going the opposite direction at 5PM going 60 miles an hour. How long before they meet?"
Oh, Gypsy, that is everything great literature should be: according to Merritt Stone.
[offscreen] HE'S NOT MERRITT STONE!
S4The Human Duplicators
[The title screen displays the title backwards...]
CCrow
Eht Numah Srotacilpud!
[...then "duplicates" it normally.]
CCrow
...Oh.
GGale
So say something!
CACrow [as Martin]
"Something!"
"Something."
CCrow
D'oh! ...Got riffback on that one.
[Super-spy Martin sees the statuesque Dr. Lin Yung standing in one of a pair of huge birdcage-like duplication cells.]
Ah! It's Malibu Barbie Torture Chambers!
Neat!
[Cut to close-up on Dr. Yung.]
CACrow [as Dr. Yung]
[in "Chinese" accent] Hi. I am new Asian Barbie.
[In the duplication chamber next to the real Dr. Yung, a skeleton slowly becomes something resembling a life-size blow-up doll.]
Huh. Well, kinda close, I suppose.
[The camera zooms in on Dr. Yung.]
CACrow [as Dr. Yung]
[in "Chinese" accent] Do I really look like that?
CCrow
Oh, come on, Doc! Did your kid make that thing?
I sing the Body Pathetic! Heh.
[Gradually, a very pale form resembling Dr. Yung materializes.]
Uh… I think you need more toner!
[The form slowly darkens to reveal an identical copy of Yung.]
CCrow
Heh heh heh. Heh! Hunan Duplicators!
Right! 'Cause they're identical Suzie Wongs?
CCrow
Yeah! Yeah. 'Cause two Wongs don't make a--
Oh, that's enough.
CCrow
Oh, don't hit me.
[Welles (played by Hugh Beaumont) answers his phone.]
WWelles
Welles here.
CACrow [as Welles/Ward Cleaver]
The boys did what? They duplicated Lumpy?
[Martin's duplicate leaves Welles' office.]
CACrow [as Welles]
There's somethin' plastic about that guy...
[Kolos, played by Richard Kiel, "beams down" from his ship with his hands outstretched.]
SAServo [as Kolos]
I'm huge.
[The Professor looks up at Kolos as Kolos advances towards him menacingly.]
SAServo [as the Professor, quickly]
Oh my God, you're huge.
S4Monster A Go-Go
[The title "Circus on Ice" shows onscreen]
You got your circus on my ice!
CCrow
Hey, you got your ice on my circus!
Two bad things that go worse together!
[Referencing a Reese's Peanut Butter Cups ad campaign.]
[in response to a clown on screen] Woah, seen him in my nightmares...
These quotes come from Wikiquote's Mystery Science Theater 3000 pages and are available under the Creative Commons Attribution-ShareAlike License.