I don't have an anger problem, I have an idiot problem!"
S7 E7The Texas Skillsaw Massacre
You cut Dale's finger off for building a tunnel. I once made a vest out of your wife's underpants. I can't imagine what you'd do to me.
Police Officer (thinking it's a domestic abuse situation): It always happens to the younger, prettier ones.
(Yelling at Hank) If it were up to you, you would have filled my buddy tunnel with cement, so no one else could use it! (Note the sexual innuendo/double entendre, based on context of scene).
Hank has always been angry. When we were in kindergarten, and the other children would use the finger paints, he would pinch them.
(enraged) You are a bold-faced liar!
Amen!
Hank Hill(To Dale): It's gonna take a lot of hard work to repair this floor, and since this is all your fault, Mister, I'm not gonna let you help me.
Can I help?
Yes, Bobby.
Objection, Conjecture, Object-ure!
That's not a word!
[realizing it's no time to keep his temper, he becomes violently angry and enraged] Get out! Get out! GET OUT! IF YOU DON'T GET OUT OF THAT GOT-DANG RAT HOLE NOW, I'LL GET MY CIRCULAR SAW, COME DOWN THERE, CUT OFF ALL YOUR FINGERS AND TOES! NOW MOVE! MOVE!! MOVE!!!
...Now that we're up here, what is so damn important?
S7 E8Full Metal Dust Jacket
Clea: Huntress of--I told you to get an adventure book.
But it is adventure.
(reading it) "The Elf-Lord Fylfendell knelt upon the bed of dandelions. 'Young wanderer,' quoth he, 'I have woven you a magic breastplate'"-- Bobby, television.
Dang it, Bobby! (snatches the book) No more elves at the table.
I've come to take the local bookseller to lunch! (realizes Peggy isn't here) Peggy? (hears gunshots) What the hell? (goes to the basement) Peggy? (finds Cotton Hill shooting the book) Dad!
Well, look who's here! Shopping for my birthday? Get me something that shoots like that! (finishes shooting the book and drops it on the floor)
Excellent grouping, Colonel. Plus, those hollow points penetrated Shakespeare all the way into the so-called "Joyous Comedies". As you like it? Well, I like it plenty.
Dang it, Dale! Where is my wife?
Probably one of her smoking breaks. I try not too keep her too tight of a leash.
And so, a farewell to A Farewell to Arms!
Take your apple-
It's a Braeburn!
-And get out!
S7 E9Pigmalion
What are you doing? That is not a proper way to interview!
S7 E10Mega Lo Dale
Hey Boomhauer, you any closer to getting married?
Dang ol'...huh?
These quotes come from Wikiquote's King of the Hill pages and are available under the Creative Commons Attribution-ShareAlike License.