Dang it, I am sick and tired of everyone's asinine ideas about me. I'm not a redneck, and I'm not some Hollywood jerk. I'm something else entirely. I'm... I'm complicated!
S9 E1A Rover Runs Through It
LGLittle girl
(as she notices the cattle coming) Look, Mommy! Moo cow!
S9 E2Death Buys a Timeshare
Peppermint schnopps make me sloppy.
S9 E3Death Buys a Timeshare
They got the water what don't give you the hot poops!
(Bill's card has been denied) I've got other cards, do you take Blockbuster?
S9 E4Yard She Blows
Why would anyone do drugs when they can just mow a lawn?
S9 E5Dale to the Chief
Now where did I put my pantyhose?
I'm all jacked up on America right now! Anyone want to hear me recite the constitution?
I'm not messing around! I have proven I can kick your ass while standing on a ladder!
[catching Dale trying to run from him after sending out the FBI] No more, Dale! I've put up with some giblet-headed things out of you in the past, but calling the FBI on me--that's final!
S9 E6The Petriot Act
Oh, this has been a cat-astrophe!
S9 E7Enrique-cilable Differences
This is the critical juncture. We can't give in. No matter how bad it gets, and it will get bad, we must stand firm. Then everything can go back to normal.
S9 E8Mutual Of Omabwah
If everybody fried their food, there would be no war.
Okay, Joseph, take that stick and poke me in my once-again robust arm. [Joseph begins poking him in his bee stings] See? I don't feel a thing. [beat] Wait a minute. I DON'T FEEL A THING!
S9 E9Care-Takin' Care of Business
Sometimes, the world is cruel to shiny things.
These quotes come from Wikiquote's King of the Hill pages and are available under the Creative Commons Attribution-ShareAlike License.