Edie Britt quotes from Desperate Housewives

Edie

Oh God, look at all these things, all these beautiful things that my ex-husbands worked so hard for, burnt to a crisp.

Edie

Oh Susan, you are such a good person, and I'm such a bitch!

Edie

So, what are we looking for, exactly? An embroidered pillow that says "I killed Martha Huber"?

Edie

My necklace! Oh, you know, I lent this to Martha three months ago, and she said that it went down the drain. Oh, I miss how we used to steal things from one another.

Edie

(to Bree) You could have an affair with anyone and you choose the pharmacist? You are such a Republican.

Edie

Oh, give me a break! This thing has, like, 90 flats in it.

Edie

Well, someone may as well say it. Susan, what the hell have you been smoking?

Edie Britt

Wow, how self absorbed can you be? I have had a thing for Mike since the day he moved in here and I even backed off when he fell for your little Miss Adorable act. But he's over that, it's my turn now and I will be better for him than you ever were. And if you do get hurt, well, that's just gravy.

Edie

The responsible thing is to abstain from sex and focus on your studies. There, I said it out loud just in case anybody asks.

Edie

I suppose we should tiptoe around like schoolchildren so our parents don't catch us doing it? I feel like I'm 12 again!

Edie Britt

This is my husband, Dave Williams.

Edie Britt

Susan Meyer, wrong again!

Edie Britt

[Last Lines] As I looked down on the world, I began to let go of it. I let go of white picket fences, and cars in driveways, coffee cups and vacuum cleaners. I let go of all those things that seemed so ordinary, but when you put them together they make up a life, a life that really was one-of-a-kind. I'll tell you something, it's not hard to die when you know you have lived. And I did. Oh, how I lived.

Susan

Hey Edie!

Edie

Wow, get a load of you. You look so pretty. I hardly recognize you.

Edie

I am not going to apologize for having a healthy sex life!

Healthy? I'm going to have to burn every sheet you've touched.