Lynette Scavo quotes from Desperate Housewives

Lynette

Next Spring, we're going to do 'Bambi' and his mother is going to take a slug to the heart....and you're gonna like it!

Lynette

Go to hell. (doorbell rings 3 times.) Go to hell, go to hell, go to hell.

Lynette

And I'm sorry about your hair. I can see why you're upset.

Lynette

What do you mean, it's bar mitzvah season? There's no such thing.

Lynette

"Listen to me. I forbid you to die. If you leave me with a mortgage and a restaurant and five kids, I swear I will track you into the deepest pit of hell and make you pay."

Lynette

"Damn it, Karen, I'm running out of Ida!

Lynette

I'm in jail 'cause of Kayla, your daughter, Tom!

Lynette Scavo

What are you talking about? You were on the same little league team.

Lynette Scavo

No, not really.

Lynette Scavo

I'm just talking to Porter on Silverfizz.

Lynette Scavo

Me! I'm sixteen, cute, I like graphic novels and Tokyo Police Club.

Lynette Scavo

Our brooding son has a classmate who got arrested for selling drugs, I really think the ends justify the means.

Lynette Scavo

The good news is he really doesn't hang out with that guy, but I am a little worried about 'Anita47' who told him cherry fruit pops are an aphordesiac.

Lynette Scavo

Yeah, our Porter, the kid who communicates with grunts and shrugs, writes this beautiful, heartwrenching poetry.

Lynette Scavo

I'm married to a 45 year old man who has a red convertible. Yeah, I think I know.