Quinn Pensky quotes from Zoey 101

Quinn

Dustin! What happend?

Dustin

I fell down a hill.

Quinn

Not with you, with Mark!

Zoey

It's true, my roommate's a freak! [Quinn looks at her] Lola.

Quinn

Oh.

Lola

You can stay here!

Quinn

You can move in with us!

Lola

You can even take a digital picture of my bra!

Dustin

Can't...breathe!

Lola

(to Zoey) On a first date, a guy and a girl are just checking each other out.

Quinn

The second dates are like a compatibility test. To see whether you guys get along.

Lola

Third date is a real turning point.

Quinn

Whether to see if your gilfriend material.

Lola

Or the dreaded "just friends".

Chase

This is so much better than a beauty pageant.

Quinn

So much better!

Michael

Girls — always fighting dirty.

Quinn

(starts to laugh) Fighting dirty, That's funny!

Michael

It is? ...Yeah, that's right, it is! It sure is! You just laugh it up, Quinn. Compliments of Michael Barrett!

Chase

It wasn't that funny.

Quinn

I know. But now, he'll stop trying to make me laugh.

Lola

I don't wanna play volleyball with Gretchen.

Quinn

How icky is she?

Lola

Well, what is Chase thinking? Why would you wanna hang out with a girl like that?

Quinn

Uh, it's pretty obvious.

Lola

What?

Quinn

She's blonde, insanely pretty, she looks like Zoey.

Lola

Well, yeah, but... Oh my god, you think that's why he wants to be friends with her?

Quinn

Totally. I mean, come on, there's nothing appealing about her personality. This is like Psychology 101. He misses Zoey, so he's trying to fill that void with a substitute.

Lola

That's so stupid. No one can replace Zoey.

Lola

How can a girl that looks that much like Zoey be so--?

Quinn

(finishes) Nauseating?!

Lola

Yeah.

Michael

(sighs) I think it's time.

Lola

For what?

Michael

An intervention. We gotta talk to Chase about Gretchen.

Quinn

All of us together?

Michael

Naw. (points to Logan with his thumb) I think me and Logan should do it alone. Could get ugly.

Zoey

OH MY GOD! He went to England!

Lola

This is so tragic!

Quinn

It's kind of sweet.

Zoey

TRAGIC!

Quinn

OKAY! Tragic!

Lola

You're supposed to be stalling Zoey!

Mark

I did as long as I could, but I ran out of stuff to say.

Quinn

So what happened?!

Mark

.... I pushed her .... into a bush.

Well, it's really cool to meet you guys. If you need me, call any time. (Mira leaves)

Bye.

Lola

Wow, a dorm adviser who's normal.

Quinn

Who dresses cool.

Lola

And doesn't smell like bugs and ravioli.

Zoey

Ok, can we stop trashing Coco behind her back?

Quinn

Why not? Most people trash her right to her face.

Zoey

Yeah, but I feel like I got her fired.

Lola

It wasn't your fault.

Stacey

Anyways, Coco already got another job.

Zoey

She did?

Lola

Really?

Quinn

Already?

Stacey

Yeah, she's working at Vaccaro's Fancy Restaurant just a half a mile up the street from PCA.

Lola

See, I bet a server there makes a ton more money than a school dorm advisor.

Zoey

Good, that makes me feel a little better.

Stacey

Um, Coco isn't working there as a server.

Zoey

Then what's she doing there? (scene changes to Carl's Mini Fancy Restaurant's lady's restroom)

Coco

(to woman) Hey! I'm Coco, ladies restroom attendant. You having a nice dinner? What'd you order? (sniffs her) Steak! (woman walks away and Zoey walks in) Zoey, what are you doing here?

Zoey

Well, Stacey told me you got a job and I just wanted to come by and say "hey."

Coco

Hey.

Zoey

Look, I'm so sorry about what happened.

Coco

I'm not. This job is fantastic.

Zoey

Yeah?

Coco

Yeah, seriously. Don't worry about it. It's really great, um, sometimes they let me--

(from inside a stall) Oh my GOD! This toilet's stopped up! Do you mind?

Coco

Yes, ma'am. (Coco heads over to the stall and turns to Zoey, sobbing) "KILL ME!! GO GET A HAMMER, THEN COME BACK, AND KILL ME WITH IT!" (walks into the stall) OH! WHAT THE HELL IS THAT?!

Lola

Either of you two seen the remote?

Quinn

It's right over there.

Lola

I guess I'll just take a nap.

Lola

When I was little, I only liked smooth peanut butter. But now I'm a chunky girl.

Quinn

Chunky?

Lola

Well, not THAT way.

Zoey

Um, Coco?

Coco

I can't go camping, leave me alone.

Lola

Okay, what do you mean you can't go camping?

Zoey

What's the problem?

Coco

I thought Carl, my boyfriend, might be cheating on me.

Coco

So I went to his house and I climbed up the tree in his front yard to wait for him to come home, right?

Right, makes sense, yea.

Coco

Then I thought he was gonna bring home another girl, which he did, but it was his mother.

Logan

Okay, well, that's good.

Coco

No, because the branch I was sitting on broke and I fell on her.

Lola

Oh my God!

Zoey

Is she hurt?

Coco

I don't know, Carl says she has a fractured neck or something.

Michael

Okay, so then what happened?

Coco

He called me a lunatic, then broke up with me, so now I have to drive to Frezno and fix this.

Quinn

You can't just leave us here at PCA.

Lola

It's semester break!

Logan

Wait!

Zoey

What are we supposed to do?

Zoey

Hey guys, we got a problem.

Quinn

What's wrong?

Zoey

Michael just called me and said that he and Lo...Why is Quinn a clown?

Lola

I got bored!

Quinn

So, we're good?

Lola

We're good. What do you say we go down to the lounge and gawk at guys?

Quinn

Let's gawk. (the two walk off laughing)