Stacey quotes from Zoey 101

Stacey

(squeals and picks up swabs) You hear that, my little cotton-topped friends? Soon, I'll be Mrs. Stacy Reese! (throws swabs and squeals)

[as he hands students back their history tests] I'd like to congratulate you all on your tests, which I know weren't easy. Most of you did quite well.

Chase

[to Vince] Vince, listen. I want you to know I'm not gonna turn you in for cheating.

Vince

Cool.

Chase

If... You swear not to do it anymore.

Vince

I hear ya.

Chase

Good. So, no more cheating.

Vince

No, I'm just letting you know I hear ya. I'm still gonna cheat.

Logan

[whispering to Chase] Dude! Don't irritate Vince!

[as he gives Vince back his test] And it looks like we have a new MVP of this class. Vince Blake gets 100! [everyone cheers]

Stacey

Vince can do anything!

Nice work, Vince.

Vince

Hey, when Vince Blake does something, he always...

Chase

Vince cheated. [the whole class stares]

What did you say?

Chase

Vince stole the answers to the test. I saw him do it.

Vince

[laughs] That's a lie.

Chase, that's a very serious charge.

Chase

I know.

Well, unless you have some proof, I suggest...

Chase

He snuck in here at night and took pictures of the test with his cellphone. And I bet he wasn't smart enough to delete 'em. [Vince gives him a look]

Vince, may I see your cellphone?

Zoey

Why would you want a date with Logan?

Stacey

Have you seen him? He's scrumptious! AND HIS ARMS! Oh, his arms! (swoons)

Stacey

Have you heard the song I wrote? I can sing it for you.

Michael

No! Please! What'd I ever do to you?

Stacey

(singing off-key. Throughout the song, Michael is whining about the song and how horrible Stacey's singing is.) You can sip it in the morning, sip it in the evening, even at a quarter to three! 'Cause I like sassafras, you like sassafras, we like sassafras teeeeeeeeeeeeeea!

Well, it's really cool to meet you guys. If you need me, call any time. (Mira leaves)

Bye.

Lola

Wow, a dorm adviser who's normal.

Quinn

Who dresses cool.

Lola

And doesn't smell like bugs and ravioli.

Zoey

Ok, can we stop trashing Coco behind her back?

Quinn

Why not? Most people trash her right to her face.

Zoey

Yeah, but I feel like I got her fired.

Lola

It wasn't your fault.

Stacey

Anyways, Coco already got another job.

Zoey

She did?

Lola

Really?

Quinn

Already?

Stacey

Yeah, she's working at Vaccaro's Fancy Restaurant just a half a mile up the street from PCA.

Lola

See, I bet a server there makes a ton more money than a school dorm advisor.

Zoey

Good, that makes me feel a little better.

Stacey

Um, Coco isn't working there as a server.

Zoey

Then what's she doing there? (scene changes to Carl's Mini Fancy Restaurant's lady's restroom)

Coco

(to woman) Hey! I'm Coco, ladies restroom attendant. You having a nice dinner? What'd you order? (sniffs her) Steak! (woman walks away and Zoey walks in) Zoey, what are you doing here?

Zoey

Well, Stacey told me you got a job and I just wanted to come by and say "hey."

Coco

Hey.

Zoey

Look, I'm so sorry about what happened.

Coco

I'm not. This job is fantastic.

Zoey

Yeah?

Coco

Yeah, seriously. Don't worry about it. It's really great, um, sometimes they let me--

(from inside a stall) Oh my GOD! This toilet's stopped up! Do you mind?

Coco

Yes, ma'am. (Coco heads over to the stall and turns to Zoey, sobbing) "KILL ME!! GO GET A HAMMER, THEN COME BACK, AND KILL ME WITH IT!" (walks into the stall) OH! WHAT THE HELL IS THAT?!

Stacey

Logie, come on!

Logan

I'M COMING!!

Logan

Let's go, Dillson.

Stacey

Sure thing.... Reese.

Stacey

You smell so good, like cinnamon sticks.

Logan

Uh, thanks.

Stacey

Let's see if your lips taste like cinnamon sticks. (kisses Logan against his will) What's wrong?

Logan

I DON'T WANNA KISS YOU!

Stacey

Why wouldn't you wanna kiss me? My lips are moist.

Logan

BECAUSE I LOVE QUINN!

Stacey

Wha-What?

You love Quinn?

Logan

That's right. (Awkward Silence) I love Quinn Pensky.

Quinn

And I love Logan Reese.

Dustin

You used me?! (Dustin Storms out. Logan and Quinn run to each other and kiss)