Logan Reese quotes from Zoey 101

Logan

(in a computerized voice) I am Quinn from Dorkon. I must go get a sprocket from my home planet, Dorkon! I am Quinn from Dorkon!

Logan

Listen to me, Dustin! I told you that I expect you to answer your cellphone when I call! I've been trying to reach you for over 10 minutes! And now, I'm late for ping pong! Okay! You've made a fool out of me for the last time! I don't care if you're 11, or 12, or however old you are! You're old enough to not be this much of an idiot!

Logan

Yeah, I...I think that's mine. (he squeezes it, and water drips from it, shrugs, and takes a bite of it)

Zoey

Ok, Logan, tell ya what. I'll round up my best five girls and you round up your best five guys. And we'll see whose better at basketball.

Logan

You serious?

Nicole

Zoey!

Zoey

I'm serious.

Logan

Good. This Friday?

Zoey

Why not?

Logan

Then, you're on!

Zoey

Good!

Logan

Here's a little tip: Try to make the balls go in the basket.

Zoey

And here's a tip for you: Try to make words not come out of your mouth!

Logan

Hope you girls have learned your lesson!

I sure have. How would you two girls like to be on the basketball team?

Logan

'Sup ladies!

Zoey

We were just talking about you.

Logan

Can't blame you.

Zoey

You're working with Logan now?

Chase

Well, I'm working, he seems to be watching.

Logan

I'm training you, so you can learn to make deliveries on your own.

Zoey

Good. Now, that we know you're not delivering anymore, we'll order more often!

Zoey

Hey, sushi's here!

Nicole

Thanks, Chase, we love the free sushi!

Chase

Look, girls, I don't know if I can keep hooking you up with all this free sushi. I think my boss is starting to get a little suspicious.

Zoey

Kazu?

Chase

Yeah, so listen, if anybody asks, just say...

Kazu

Aha! I knew it!

Chase

Kazu!

Kazu

You've been stealing all my sushi and giving it to these girls!

Chase

Uh, no, no, that's... that's not true.

Kazu

Yes, it is! I'm going to tell the Dean. And then you will be... And then you will be...

Zoey

Quinn, next card!

Kazu

Expelled! You will be expelled!

Chase

Expelled?!

Kazu

You're going to prison!

Nicole

No!

Zoey

I'm sorry, I panicked!

Chase

He's out cold.

Zoey

Oh, no, now, we're all gonna get expelled!

Chase

No, nobody's getting expelled!

Nicole

But he's gonna wake up eventually and tell the Dean what happened!

Chase

Yes, that's why we have to get rid of him!

Zoey

Let's tie him up and shove him in the closet!

Chase

Right! Then, late tonight, when everyone's asleep, we hot wire his car, and put Kazu in the trunk!

Zoey

We'll drive him... to Mexico!

Logan

Did she say, "Mexico"?

Michael

Si!

Nicole

But what if the Dean finds out?

Zoey

She has a point.

Chase

Hey... he didn't see who hit him!

Zoey

Right! We'll blame it all on... on... Logan!

Logan

Me?!

Chase

Okay! We'll blame the whole thing on Logan! Stealing the sushi, knocking out Kazu, everything!

Logan

They're gonna blame everything on me!

Michael

I heard.

Zoey

Okay, quick, let's tie up Kazu and shove him in the closet.

Nicole

I got the duct tape!

Logan

I gotta do something!

Michael

Ok, you go get the Dean.

Logan

I'm not gonna let Chase and those crazy girls frame me.

Michael

You go get em, man.

Logan

Kazu, I can explain.

Kazu

So can I, you're fired! (chuckles) I feel like Donald Trump.

Logan

But, you got whacked in the head with a vase.

Kazu

What?

Zoey

Chase, thank you so much!

Chase

It’s okay, but, actually, it wasn’t me.

Zoey

Michael?

Michael

Not me.

Zoey

Then who was it? (Chase and Michael point to Logan) Logan? Why would you want to keep me at PCA?

Logan

If you weren't around, who else would I pick on?

Zoey

Aw, it's a bunny with a PCA shirt on!

Logan

Chase picked it out.

Chase

Why do you tell people?

Logan

Do girls know anything?

Dana

I know how to make you cry.

Logan

What are you gonna do? Kiss me?

Dana

You wish!

Logan

Yeah I do! (laughs)

Logan

Or I could give you a ride, maybe we could go to the beach and make out a little.

Zoey

You know, I would, but it's so hard for a girl to kiss a guy while she's vomiting.

Chase

It's true. It happened to me once.

Logan

(to Chase) Why do you waste your time with the drama club? Why don't you go out for football or something?

Chase

Because the drama club's loaded with hot girls. And I've seen the football team. They're not hot.

Michael

I don't know. Dave, the quarterback, is a pretty handsome dude. (Chase and Logan give him weird looks) I've said too much.