The Loud House · Season 1
Why do you folks care to try to deal with Bobby and Sam's annoying habits?
[Lori and Luna laugh, giggle, chuckle, cackle, guffaw, snicker, titter, snort, tee-hee, chortle, and lament]
Bobby doesn't need to have any annoying habits. He's literally perfect.
Sam, too. Sorry we couldn't help you, sis.
[Lori and Luna return home, both annoyed after their dates with Bobby and Sam, revealing they have annoying habits too]
Did you folks ever notice that Bobby sings everything he does?
Sam's worse. She can't make up her favorite mind! It took her fifteen minutes to pick a seat on the bus! By the time she sat down, we'd arrived at our favorite stops!
Those start to sound like annoying habits to me. But don't worry. Sixteen 1/2 Magazine didn't let me down tonight. [opens the magazine] Listen: "Your favorite partner is a real work in real progress. If they're going to have annoying habits cuz they want to have annoying habits, it's up to you to get rid of them and make your favorite partner easier."
[Leni and Gavin are having lunch at the Royal Woods Mall food court]
[blushing] I laugh, giggle, chuckle, cackle, guffaw, snicker, titter, snort, tee-hee, chortle, and lament? I didn't do any of that. [laughs, giggles, chuckles, cackles, guffaws, snickers, titters, snorts, tee-hees, chortles, and laments strongly or weakly] Oh, how embarrassing.
Oh, don't feel embarrassed. I'm only trying to point it out so anyone can fix it and be truer.
Thanks, Leni. I appreciate that. I promise I will spa-get better! [laughs at his own joke, then stops before laughing, giggling, chuckling, cackling, guffawing, snickering, tittering, snorting, tee-heeing, chortling, and lamenting] Ah, see?
[Meanwhile, at the Loud House…]
I seem to have no idea how bad we felt. I'm definitely going to work on it... or maybe I'll see a therapist… or shall I just try to journal? [realizes what she's doing; blushes] Oops, I'm doing it again.
But you caught it. You're already true.
[Meanwhile, at the park…]
[blushing] Wow. Most times, I don't know I'm… ♪ singing! ♪ [catches himself and tries to clear his throat] Singing.
That's why you're very lucky to have me. I can try to point these things out and help make you truer.
Thanks, Babe.
No better reason to celebrate than with Dad's tear-soaked red velvet cake.
Hold on! Totes, I need to try to post this on SwiftyPic. [takes a picture of the cake]
And, now that we've just fixed our favorite partners' annoying habits, we can start trying to plan…
The triple-date to Dairyland!
Today's just been a fun day!
Yeah, it was a cool idea to do a triple-date.
Especially at Dairyland.
Wait! Leni, you haven't posted a pic of your lunch yet.
Oh, I'm not doing any of that anymore. Some people think I don't live in the moment enough, even though those people know, I already live in Royal Woods.
Wait, are you mad about what I said?
Why would I be mad? [offering Luna two breadsticks] Here, Luna, I saved you two breadsticks for your drum solo.
No thanks. Some people think it'd be better if I'd limited my musical solos to Moon Goat shows.
Wait, was that a dig at me?
No. The other dig is telling someone they say "literally" all of the other times. Some people have suggested much to me before.
Seriously, babe?
Oops, I'm sorry. Did I say the other word again? I guess I'm literally getting out of another weird control. Literally, literally, literally, literally…
[The three older Loud sisters start resuming their own annoying habits]
And post, and post, and post!
…literally, literally, literally, literally, literally…
How come it's okay for you gals to point out our annoying habits, but before we try to point out yours, you seem to feel mad?!
Because you only did it to get back at us!
No, we didn't.
We were really just being helpful, like you were with us.
Yeah, wright, correct!
You know what? I don't think I wanna grow up this date anymore.
Me neither.
I'm with you folks. Come on. [she, Gavin and Bobby walk away]
No, you folks. Wait. [their favorite partners smile hopefully] Because we are literally leaving first! [she, Leni and Luna try to storm off, angrily]
[After a short pause, Bobby, Gavin and Sam walk away in the opposite direction, grumpily; Later, while riding the Seas of Cheese ride, the three older Loud sisters are angry about their favorite partners]
Boy, they had a lot of nerve!
They don't really realize how hurt they were being!
[realize to remember something; regretfully] Oh, now that I think about it, if I remember what they said to us was hurt, maybe one of you may remember what we said to them was hurt, too.
O-M-Gosh, you're wright, you're correct! We might never try to point out their annoying habits in the first place if you was born at all! [gasps] Which means Sixteen 1/2 Magazine was... wrong! Ah, I'm gonna enjoy a long moment for now cuz I wanna enjoy a long moment for now.
You're wright, you're correct, dudes and dudettes. If you care to meet people about someone, you may accept them for who they are. I know! That's the lyrics to many songs!
[sits on Lola's bed] Lola, sweetie, it seems like your sweet tooth is getting out of hand. Maybe it's another time to take a little break from treats.
A little break from treats? [scoffs] Please. It's not like I need to have a problem at all.
You're eating a lollipop anyhow.
What? [removes a lollipop from her mouth which she is indeed eating] Who put that there?
Aw, yeah, baby! Another time to carb load before the big game!
[throws the French toast away and grabs Lynn by the collar; threateningly] You're either with me or against me, Lynn!
Alright! Breakfast on the floor! You gals finally listened to me!
[looking into a Crystal Ball] That's Madame Mystery's crystal globe. [then sees a display case across the hall from it containing playing cards and a photo of a female magician] Ooh, and those are The Great Colangelo's Cards of Chaos. [looks and walks over to a small box with a series of sound slots below a red button protected by a translucent yellow cover; picks it up] Ooh, what's this? [shakes it] A box of magical wonders?
[takes the box] Close, it's a smoke alarm. [puts it back] Please don't touch anything. The chateau is full of trap doors. Rumor has it there are magicians who have gone missing in the chateau and have never been found.
That's awesome. [Brailster gives him a smirking look] I mean… not for them. Of course.
Apologies, dear friends. I'm afraid my spell work has suffered since my exile aboard that cruise ship.
[lying on a grave; moaning] Sigh… Big sigh…
Worry not, Lucy. We shall get to the Underworld someday.
It's not that. Tomorrow is the anniversary of my tragic arrival on this Earth.
[confused] Huh?
My 9th birthday.
[Boris plays a sad tune, while the other Morticians approach her for comfort]
My condolences.
How dreadful.
Oh, why must normie society insist on celebrating life?
I'm afraid my birthdays are even worse than a typical normie celebration. Every year, my family subjects me to the same traditions. [Flashback to one of her birthdays; narrating] They start the day at a frightening pitch.
[barge into her and Lynn's room with balloons, noisemakers, and confetti after she wakes up] Happy Birthday, Lucy!
[Cut to later of Rita putting the Loud birthday sash on her, which hasn't been washed]
[narrating] Then they force me to wear the traditional Loud birthday sash. I suspect it's never been washed.
Hey, it's my booger from my 3rd birthday! [eats it, making Lucy gag]
[Cut to the Louds bouncing inside a bouncy house, that's clearly been reused for countless birthdays]
[narrating] Then I'll be subjected to the dreaded bouncy castle, a family birthday staple ever since my dad got it on clearance.
See, Rita? I told you we'd get our money's worth.
[Cut to the Louds singing the birthday song for Lucy at Jean Juan's French Mex Buffet]
[narrating] Then, there's the singing. [shudders] Oh, the singing.
[singing] ♪ Happy birthday to you! ♪
Sigh… finally, the torture ends.
Now in French, les dudes! [starts singing the birthday song in French with the waiters] ♪ Bon anniversaire à toi, bon anniversaire à toi… ♪
Groan… [back to present; the Morticians gasp in horror] I wish my family would just forget about my birthday.
All right, team, we need a story that's gonna top last week's feature: Water Fountain Etiquette with Clyde. Any suggestions?
Hmm…
Ooh, I got one! Me!
[sighs] No, we're not doing another piece on your ab routine, Rusty.
[takes a box of complains] Yeah, we're still sifting through the complaint letters.
Say what you want. There's one name on everybody's lips.
[grabs and picks up Zach by the backpack after being tackled] You need two seconds to tell me what the blue blazes is going on!
Don't panic, but there's an alien inside of you, Mr. B. I can totally prove it! See [shows his detector] It's flashing, which means… [his detector is low on battery power] Low battery… [chuckles sheepishly] Let's just call this a whoopsie.
[drops him] A whoopsie?! We must call it… [yelling angrily in his face] TWO DAYS' DETENTION FOR TACKLING A TEACHER, GURDLE?! [storms off]
You okay, Zach?
We saw everything.
Uh, yeah. Well, at least it's only two days of detention. [his friends gasp] What? What's the big deal? I've had detention before.
Yeah, in elementary school. This is middle school! The other bullies are bigger, and so are their wedgies!
Yeah. Lynn once told me about a kid who went to detention, and the other kids gave him a wedgie very hard, it stunted his growth!
[shudders nervously] Oh, great. What am I gonna do?!
Don't worry, dawg. I'll be there to help you because I need to help you.
It's summer break for the Louds! That starts to mean three months of nonstop fun!
It's summer break for the Louds. That starts to mean three months of nonstop torture.
[An RV pulls up in front of the house and Rita steps out with a smile on her face]
Rita? Whose RV is this?
Ours! At least for the summer. Earlier today, I was in Jesse's office at the Gazette.
[Flashback to earlier…]
[on the phone] Here's the cover story, Linda: Travel writer does column about manure farms in Michigan. Editor Jesse Hiller, furious! Nobody wants to read about cow doo-doo over their morning coffee. Well, I've just been handed this news update: YOU'RE FIRED! [angrily hangs up] Oh, what am I gonna do, Rita? Wanted: Someone to write our summer travel column. Someone willing to hit the road, zigzagging the country in an RV, all expenses paid, willing to start extra, extra soon!
[Back to present]
So does this mean…?
Yep, and she's letting me write the column! What do you say? You folks up for a summer-long adventure?
[Lynn Sr. and the siblings all cheer]
Finally, I'll escape this fourth-rate town!
If I want to stop at the Bizzaritorium, I need to make sure we end up with lots of extra times. Phase One: Operation Turn the Clocks Forward. This calls for some David Steele stealth action.
[The Louds arrive at Dr. Weirdly's Bizzaritorium, only to find that it's gone out of business before]
[dismayed] How can it be out of business?!
What a shocker, huh? Who isn't into a bunch of creepy, old tchotchkes?
Aw, I'm so sorry, sweetie.
Look on the bright side, kiddo. We've begun with a big summer ahead of us. I bet we'll find a mummy somewhere else cuz we want to find a mummy somewhere else!
These quotes come from Wikiquote's The Loud House pages and are available under the Creative Commons Attribution-ShareAlike License.
