The Loud House · Season 1
Hey, there, Vic, old buddy, old pal. Afraid we got some bad news for you.
We just discovered that according to state regulations, Gila monsters are not allowed in hotel establishments. Animal Control is on the way as we speak.
[horrified] AH! Okay, okay, I'll give you your money back. I'll bump you up to red level. Just call off Animal Control!
All we want is the vacation we were promised.
Deal! Are you doing it? Are you calling? I can't see!
[grabs her twin by the overalls] There is a skunk on my Egyptian cotton sheets! I cannot imagine a bigger emergency!
That's just Ann. She caught a cold in the park, so I figured, why not let her bunk with us till she feels better?
SKUNK, Y'ALL!!! [the crowd runs around screaming in fear]
Stop! You're scaring Antoinette!
EEEEEEEEEEWWWWWWWWWWW!!!!!!!!!!!!!
(coughs at the stinky smell): I’M CALLING ANIMAL CONTROL!
Lola (stops him): No! Please don’t call animal control. This is my fault. I’ll take the skunk back to where she belongs.
You are just going to reanimate her anyway, aren't you?
Todd, we need to have a scientific obligation to solve the universe's greatest mysteries. And if that leads to a museum wing being named after me, who am I to quibble?
But how are we just going to do it?
Dr. Alvarez shall and will just be out for her volleyball tournament tomorrow. It'll just become the perfectest time. We'll just feel early, before the museum starts to open. Looking forward to meeting you, prehistoric woman.
[sitting on his own knees] No! Not the Prank War! It is the bane of my existence every year. No matter how hard we try we never like to come anywhere besides beating the Sand Trap team. [groans] They're just too good for it!
The worst part is that the losing team has to clean the winners toilets for a month.
Well, save your own plungers, people, because Lori Loud tries to clean no one's own toilets. I literally come from the prankiest family ever. I can win this for us.
A little advice… Now that you know the pranking basics, remember, anything can be a prank. And I mean anything.
[entering her and Luna's own bedroom] Hey! It's the Moon Goats! My favorite [bleats] BAAA-nd!
[groaning] We got zilch.
Agh! And we've been working forever. How long has it been? Hours? Days?!
[checks the time on her phone] It's been seven minutes.
This is very hard. How are we supposed to find songs toddlers rock to?
Another song!
Aw, sorry, little guy. But we've only got…
[grabs Sam by the collar and pulls her into his face; viciously] It's my birthday and I want another song!
Excuse me. Pardon me. Award-winning news celebrity coming through. Nice to meet you. I'm…
[surprised] Katherine Mulligan!
Yes, I'm here with my favorite niece, Adeline Mulligan. [turns around, revealing Adeline in a baby harness on her back] And I need to say, your own band is really a toddler sensation. I love to have you perform on my morning show, Kat Chat. Start the other day with a hot, steaming up of Katherine!
A gig? On TV?! For REAL?!
Absolutely. And Katherine Mulligan pays a generous appearance fee. So, what do you say?
Let me discuss with my associates.
[The Moon Goats huddle up in a circle]
Guys, we could get those thumpin' speakers, like, way faster!
Yeah, and probably still have some money left for that awesome stage package we saw, remember?
[They imagine themselves rocking out with the new speakers and confetti cannons]
[dreamily] Oh, many pretty colors.
We're in!
Great! Let's say, tomorrow morning. Oh, and one thing, I want you to play a new song. Katherine Mulligan likes her performances the way she likes her breaking news: exclusive! Now, I have to go. My niece has seemingly escaped. [leaves] Adeline Mulligan, do not lick that cake!
New speakers, here we come!
[The Moon Goats sit outside in the front yard as Luna paces around, back and forward; backwards and forth]
Without Lily, we seem to have no songs for tomorrow morning! Our own big TV debut is currently just gonna act like a big bust!
We need to think about something.
[as Sully gasps] I swear, if this is gas again…
No, no, no, no, no. I just realize Lily's not the only baby in the city.
[gasps] Yes, yes! All we need to do is snag a tune from another toddler! Sully, you're a total genius!
Told you nothing bad happened… [belches] Okay, some of it was gas.
These quotes come from Wikiquote's The Loud House pages and are available under the Creative Commons Attribution-ShareAlike License.
