A character in The Loud House
Lincoln
The Loud House · 632 quotes
Most-quoted character in The Loud House: in 227 of its 632 quotes
Most scenes with: Lori (46), Lynn (40), Lynn Sr (38)
[The Actions News Team enter the cafeteria kitchen and find Chef Pat's deep freezer being vandalized]
Chef Pat, what can you tell us, and I don't mean the lunch specials.
Some heartless monster busted in here and ate all of my… I mean, the school's ice cream! Michigan Cherry, the best flavor! Sorry. I need a minute. [runs away, sobbing]
I scream, you scream, we all scream for justice.
[The Action News Team and Crikey have captured the fake Crikey and Liam takes off the mask, revealing to be…]
[shocked gasp] Mr. Budden?!
You're the one who trashed the school and framed Crikey?!
Why would you do that?!
[un-zipping the kangaroo costume] It was the only way to get your beloved Crikey out of here! He's overshadowed my pep band from day one! We never perform in our own anymore! We're always backup for Crikey. I didn't go to an expensive music school to be less pop songs for a kangaroo! And his treatment around here is frankly ridiculous. Donuts every morning, a key to the teachers' lounge. Oh, give me a break!
[video-calling Principal Ramirez on his phone] Did you get all that, Principal Ramirez?
[in her bathrobe and her hair wrapped in a towel] Yes, I did. [firmly] Mr. Budden, you and I are gonna have a little talk tomorrow. [to Rusty; annoyed] And Mr. Spokes, I don't know how you had this number, but lose it. [hangs up]
[ashamed] Well, Trevor Bernard Budden, you've done it again. I guess I deserve whatever's coming to me. [walks over to Crikey] Crikey, I'm really sorry about everything.
[looking through binoculars from his bedroom window, watching Lori waiting outside her apartment for her new mattress to arrive] 9:00 A.M. No sign of delivery, just Lori trying to get gum off her shoe. Yeesh. [to the viewers] I know what this looks like, but I'm not spying on Lori. She ordered a new mattress that's being delivered today, and I'm gonna claim her old one. It's still in great shape! Meanwhile, my mattress has sustained some damage. [zoom out to reveal he's standing on his wrecked mattress] Oh, don't worry, it's just cherry Flippee spillage… [gets a coil caught in his head] And there are coil issues. [shakes his head to get the coil off and hears a truck horn outside] The mattress is here! [walks outside to Lori's apartment as she pushes her new mattress inside] Hey, Lori! Let me help you.
Nice try, Lincoln. I already gave my old mattress to Leni.
What?! Why Leni?!
Because she's next in line. It's literally a family rule. Did you forget about the L.L.S.? "Loud Line of Succession?"
Of course not. [cut to him in front of the bookshelf, only to be proven wrong that he did forgot; to the viewers] I definitely forgot about the Loud Line of Succession. [uses Lynn's hockey stick to get the Book of Loud Stuff down from the top shelf] It's right here in the Book of Loud Stuff. Mom and Dad put this together years ago to help solve disputes over our…stuff. Ah, here it is: The L.L.S. [reading] "A handed down item will always go to the next oldest sibling. If that sibling passes on the item, it moves to the next oldest." Wait, that's how I can get the mattress! I just need Leni, Luna, Luan and Lynn to pass on it. Easy-peasy. [closes the book and gets covered in dust]
This will keep Lynn busy for hours. [starts a 24-hour timer on his phone and puts it in his pocket as he runs off]
Huh? 80% pork, 20% beef. Crispy yet pillowy roll. That's a meatball sub, baby! Oh, yeah! [opens her door and eats the meatball sub]
What's with the racket? Mr. Coconuts is on a call with his agent!
I told you, Marty, I won't work with sock puppets!
If I can explain-
[slamming Lincoln's head down to the floor] Stinkoln thinks Lori's mattress is now his because of an amendment in that dumb rule book!
There are amendments?
I had no idea!
Hmm. Well, this is for sure Dad's handwriting. Sorry, Lynn. If you never took possession of the mattress, then, it belongs to Lincoln.
[reading an amendment while taking possession of Lincoln's lamp] "Any hand-me-down not being properly cared for can be claimed by the next sibling in the Line of Succession." This light is covered in dust. [blows the dust off the lamp, which then covers her brother all over]
[hears Lola screaming, runs into the bathroom and finds her and her twin playing tug-of-war over Rita's old bathrobe; takes the robe out of their hands] What the heck is going on in here?!
Lola is trying to steal Mom's old robe from me!
It can never become yours to begin with! You know French terry is my favorite fabric!
Well, I'm two minutes older than you, so I was next in line!
[sticks a yellow sticky note on her twin's nose] That's a "Use It or Lose It" amendment I found. And since you don't even bathe, it gives me the right to TAKE THAT ROBE!
[takes the note off her nose and throws it on the floor] I don't care about your stupid rules! I'm keeping it!
[Lincoln then hears Luna and Luan fighting in their room]
[as Luan runs out of their room, carrying a leather jacket; angrily] That's my leather jacket, dude! Leni passed it down to me! [chases after her]
Yeah, but this amendment says that disrespecting an item is grounds for forfeiture!
[gets an idea and dashes into his room] I have an announcement! [his sisters all stop fighting] I've decided… [drags out Lori's old mattress] to let Lynn have this mattress.
Huh? What?!
[Lynn smiles wisely, knowing her brother is doing the right thing]
Look. I know I've started all of this, but I think everyone must get their favorite things back. The Book of Loud Stuff was created to keep the peace in this house, but now we're just using it to take advantage of ourselves. I propose one last amendment. [takes out a pen and writes down a new amendment on a yellow sticky note] "The well-being of the family always comes first."
You're right, Lincoln. You're correct, brother.
Agreed.
Absolutely.
[Lance and Shelby arrive at Tall Timbers Park in Royal Woods for the Orcs, Horks, Wizards, and Pork, and find Lynn Sr. and Lincoln there, too]
Be that my favorite brother and favorite niece?
Lincoln! Uncle Lynn! [runs over to her favorite cousin and uncle, all hugging happily]
Hey, Shelbs!
Sweet bathrobe, little bro.
Nae, good sir. 'Tis a magic cloak, for I am Hamdalf the Wise. And this is my apprentice, Spare Rib. Ahh, I see you're traveling with the Pork Ranger!
Verily! I be a half-orc archer whose prosciutto arrows have slain many a foe! Now to come up with your character, Dad.
[runs over to his father along with Shelby when he comes out of a bush, dazed and groaning] Hamdalf! What happened?
[ashamed] Forgive me, companions. Dumbleboar didn't send me on a quest to faraway lands to seek the gem, yet I have failed.
[confused] "Faraway lands"?
Verily. I had to cross I-75!
[turns to her father; shocked] Were you trying to get rid of Uncle Lynn?
[nonchalantly] It was just a misunderstanding.
[off-screen] You, sir, are a cheater! [comes out of another bush, his hands and feet are tied up with sausages and his wizard costume is gone] This monster broke out of the stocks and tied me up in sausage!
[Lynn Sr. gasp in shock]
[hurt] That's not true, Dad. Is it?
[as Kotaro and Harold glare at him; hesitantly] No, it's n-- [stammers] I don't know. I di-I didn't...
[fuming angrily at him for sabotaging the game and deceiving her] Thanks for ruining the game! [runs away]
Shelby! Wait! [sighs in disappointment to himself as everyone else walks away and comes up to his brother] Well, you win. Shelby officially likes you better.
[confused] What are you talking about?
I came here to connect with Shelby, but instead, she ends up connecting with you. Thanks, Hambone.
Okay, it's "Hamdalf," and I'm not your problem. You are.
And what is that supposed to mean?
You haven't been listening to Shelby all day. You've just been doing what you want. This game might seem silly and ridiculous to you, but it's important to her.
[touched by the wise words] Huh. Wow, you are so right. You really are Hamdalf the Wise. I know what I have to do.
[Lincoln enters Lisa and Lily's room when he heard an explosion and saw that Lisa created a holographic version of herself]
Lisa?! Why is there another Lisa, Lisa?!
Salutations, lone male sibling. I see you've met my holographic doppelgänger.
[sticks his hand through the hologram] Whoa. This is incredible!
Aw, thank you. Mother suspended my experiments after I may have singed off Lily's hair with hydrogen dioxide. [Lily appears with her hair burned off, grumbles angrily at her, and walks away] Thus, I hid my lab in the closet, invented Holo-Lisa, and ol' Rita is none the wiser!
[calling from downstairs] Lincoln! You're not playing video games, are you? [comes upstairs and sees the Holo-Lincoln vacuuming the mess outside his room]
Just cleaning up!
Wow! I gotta say, I'm a little surprised. I thought for sure you would try some elaborate scheme to get out of cleaning your room. Okay! Well, I'm off to the paper.
Just cleaning up!
Yes, I got that. [walks away, suspiciously]
[pops out of the mess] Looks like this weekend just got a whole lot Button Mashier!
[Lincoln is in the kitchen, looking for something in the fridge and Luan and Mr. Coconuts appear, startling him]
Oh! Hey, Lincoln! I came in to remind you that my comedy show is starting in the living room! [leaves as her brother smiles nervously]
[to the viewers] I'm all for supporting my family, but Luan's comedy shows can be a lot. Especially if Mr. C decides to roast me again.
[Flashback to the last comedy show]
Well, if it isn't the man with the plan! I assume you planned on keeping that booger in your nose?
[Lincoln covers his nose with a booger sticking out and sinks in embarrassment as his other sisters laugh at him; End of flashback]
[wipes his nose with his finger] Time to shine, Holo-Lincoln.
Lincoln? Why is there another Lincoln, Lincoln?
[sighs] It's a long story.
Let me guess… You didn't want to clean, study, or watch Luan's comedy show, so you came up with an elaborate scheme that involved Lisa's holograms?
And this is why you're my best friend. [his phone buzzes, getting a text from his father] Uh-oh. My dad just asked if I want anything from the kitchen.
Oh, that's nice. And honestly, I'm a little peckish myself.
No! This is bad! My dad's at the restaurant, which means a Holo-Lincoln must be there too! We have to get to Lynn's Table before he figures out what's going on!
[exits his room and sees countless Holo-Lincolns all around the house; worriedly] Uh… This is bad.
[screams off-screen] LINCOLN! [hugging Eunice as the holograms surround her in the twins' room] WHAT IS HAPPENING?!
[cowering in fear on her bed; screams] IT'S A LINCOLN-POCALYPSE!
[kicking the door open; determined] Don't worry. I'm gonna make these holograms holo-gone!
[Lincoln sees his sisters all glaring sharply at him and demanding an explanation after he turns off all the holograms]
[chuckles nervously as he takes a few steps back] You're probably wondering what's going on.
Yes, we are.
[Lincoln turns around, seeing the parents standing right behind him at the front door, looking very stern, and Lynn Sr. points to the Holo-Lincoln vacuuming outside the window]
Just cleaning up!
[Lincoln immediately turns off the hologram with his phone with a look of horror]
[sternly] Well?
[sighs shamefully] Okay. The truth is, I didn't want to clean or study. So, I tried to get out of it by making holograms… [looks at Lisa peering behind the desk table and points to the waiver, reminding him not to tell anyone where he got the holograms] With some help from a David Steele comic.
[simultaneously sharped] Elaborate scheme! Called it! Jinx!
I'm sorry, but I sure learned my lesson. We can probably just let this one go, right?
[simultaneously] No. Jinx again!
[Moments later… Lincoln has finished cleaning his room by tossing a crushed Flippee cup into his trash can, fully stacked with all the garbage, completing all of his tasks the old-fashioned way]
Okay, studying is done, room is all clean, now all that's left is Luan's comedy show. [leaves his room and enters the living room, hopping on the chair]
Oh, there he is! The hologram with the plan himself! It is you, right?
[Lincoln laughs as Luan touches his face]
Very humorous, Luan!
[whispering] Don't worry. I didn't tell them anything about our little--
Very humorous, Luan!
[Lincoln suspiciously sticks his hand through the hologram and gasps, then turns around and sees the real Lisa on the stairs, wearing her bathrobe and her hair wrapped in a towel, and shushes mischievously]
These quotes come from Wikiquote's The Loud House pages and are available under the Creative Commons Attribution-ShareAlike License.
