A character in SpongeBob SquarePants
Mr. Krabs
SpongeBob SquarePants · 1,068 quotes
4th most-quoted character in SpongeBob SquarePants: in 261 of its 1,068 quotes
Most scenes with: Abrasive SpongeBob (181), Squidward (104), Patrick (61)
Here you go, Mr. Krabs. You earned it.
Well, boy-yo, you believed in me. So, today will be a payday for you.
What about me?
You, Ex-Captain Squidward, have gone from payday to mayday! Mush! Every last one of ya! All the way back to Bikini Bottom! [laughs]
[The episode ends with Squidward and the customers pulling the Krusty Krab back to Bikini Bottom while SpongeBob and Mr. Krabs sit on the roof]
[Patrick looks at SpongeBob, who gives him a thumbs up. Patrick looks at Don Grouper and Mr. Krabs. Patrick looks at SpongeBob again]
Uh-huh, uh-huh, uh-huh...!
[turns to the audience; awkwardly] Good evening, ladies and the other ones. I know you're all excited to see the 400th commercial, but before we see it, I just want to say that Frozen Krabby Patties are MADE WITH SAND! [The audience gasps in shock]
[shocked] Oh, no! [faints in Don Grouper's arms again]
That was cute when you were rich. [drops Mr. Krabs and surrenders with his hands up guiltily] I'm out of here. [leaves the stage as the audience vomit out sand. In doing so, their butts shrink down to their normal size. The scene changes to a graph of the Frozen Krabby Patty sales going down]
And in shocking news today, it has been revealed that Frozen Krabby Patties are made with sand.
[As everyone is watching the news, various people vomit out sand and their butts shrink back to normal. One of which vomits out palm trees. Another vomits out patty-shaped sand. Another vomits out sand shaped like a rectangular box. Another vomits sand through his eye sockets. Another vomits out sand with a snail in it. Then their butts begins to shrivel up afterwards. Not wanting to take this anymore, the customers decided once and for all to throw away all of the frozen patties they bought. Mr. Krabs is seen near a trashcan, depressed. The Krusty Factory is being closed down and pushed away by construction workers]
Well, it's gone. Everything I spent me life building is all gone. I'm ruined. [sobs]
Hey, kids, I'm a... [The kids scream at Patrick's clown outfit. Patrick screams and hides in the coral tree]
Hey, I'm not paying you to play hide-and-seek! These children want to be entertained! Get down here! [shakes the tree and Patrick falls off the tree]
Whoa. [belches] This must be the place. [enters Ms. Mildred's room] Hello? Ooh.
[In the middle of the room, there is a large water bed]
Ooh-ee. That is one big—water bed? [touches the bed and it ripples up to the top.
[On top of the bed, Billy is up there bouncing on it]
Birthday cake!
Dogfish!
Hi, Daddy!
Don't call me that! And stop jumping on that water bed! You'll pop it!
Okay, Daddy!
[climbs up to the top] Get over here! [jumps on the bed to grab Billy, but misses]
Hah, Daddy!
Why, you little... [jumps on the bed to grab Billy, but misses again. He growls and tries to catch Billy. However, his pointy feet pops the water bed]
Whoa, whoa, whoa!
Uh-oh.
Whoa, whoa, whoa!
[The water bed explodes water]
[picks up the patty with SpongeBob] Ah-ha! You're getting sloppy, Plankton. Squidward almost squashed ya. [laughs] Back to the bucket with ya! [opens the door]
No! No, Mr. Krabs! It's me! [gets kicked out and sent flying to the doors of the Chum Bucket] Whoa-ho! [lands safely on the floor]
[Karen scans SpongeBob]
Ooh! [giggles] That tickles.
Well, SpongeBob SquarePants, it looks like you lost a little weight.
Oh, hi, Karen. Where's Plankton?
You landed on him.
[SpongeBob looks down and sees that he is sitting directly on Plankton]
Hi, Plankton! [gets off]
SpongeBob? Why are you so small? Is this a trick?
Calm down. He's clean. I frisked him.
I didn't mean to get small like you, Plankton. It was a freak accident.
Huh? Who are you calling a freak?! Wait a second. [giggles and takes out a tape measure] Hold this. [measures SpongeBob while he holds the tape; gasps] You're not small like me, Shorty! I am a towering half-a-millimeter taller than you! [laughs evilly] I win! [laughs evilly]
Hooray! [lets go of the tape and Plankton gets himself tangled in it] I'll get that.
Don't touch that! [gets sliced up by the tape]
Oops.
[falls into pieces] Get him outta here, Karen!
Way ahead of ya, Chief. [flicks SpongeBob out of the Chum Bucket and sends him flying into the windows of the Krusty Krab. SpongeBob slides down the window just as a purple kid comes by]
I'm an artist.
I'm rich.
And I helped. [laughs as the episode ends]
[Mr. Krabs and Mrs. Puff fight each other again. However, now that Neptune's Moon is gone, they both revert themselves back into their regular forms. But unfortunately, the effects of Neptune's Moon also caused their respective clothing to dissolve into nothingness, thus leaving them naked]
Oops. [cover themselves in embarrassment and run off laughing]
[Larry reverts back to his regular form as well. But he is also naked. He picks up a flower and uses it as a loincloth. Then he walks away. Pearl and Squidward continue fighting above Sandy's treedome. They both revert back to their regular forms. However, they're also naked as well. Pearl spits Squidward out from her mouth]
What is going on here? [gasps] MY CLOTHES! [screams and runs away]
[screams and runs away as she is naked] NO!
[SpongeBob and Patrick revert back to the regular forms, but they're also naked as well]
Aah!
[SpongeBob pulls himself off of Sandy's suit. Patrick giggles and falls off of Sandy's helmet. SpongeBob looks around and sees Sandy's treedome destroyed]
Um, Sandy, how come your treedome is broken and everyone's naked?
Well, SpongeBob, let's just say this has been the most interesting birthday I ever had.
And, of course, Neptune's Moon is always followed by Neptune's Sun.
[The ground shakes. Neptune's Sun comes out of a volcano and shines its light on Sandy. The light then transforms Sandy into a realistic land squirrel. It appears that Neptune's Sun only effects land creatures while Neptune's Moon only effects sea creatures. Sandy chitters and crawls around inside her suit]
You don't see that everyday. Jinx! Buy me a patty!
[They both laugh as Sandy chitters]
Don't worry, Mr. Krabs. I'll get all these clams out of here right now.
[A clam spits another pearl and Mr. Krabs catches it]
Not so fast, SpongeBob. [puts the pearl in a bag] What's your hurry? [chuckles]
Didn't you just tell me to get the clams out of here 'cause they're stealing food from your customers?
[The clams continue to attack the customers. A clam spits another pearl at Mr. Krabs]
Ow! Forget the customers. If these clams keep spitting pearls at me, I'll be rich! Good clams. Good clams! Tee-hee-hee. Oh. [groans as the clams smother him; he pushes the clams away] Bad clams! Stupid clams! Smelly clams! [the clams spit pearls at Mr. Krabs] Ow! Ow! Ooh! Ah! Ow! Ow! [pops up as if he is wearing a king's clothing made out of pearls; he chuckles]
I've gotta get these clams out of here! [opens the door] Follow me, clams.
[The clams follow SpongeBob out of the restaurant]
Wait! SpongeBob! Come back with those crummy clams! [the clams turn around and spit more pearls at Mr. Krabs] Whoa! [slips and falls on his face]
I figured if I tired them out, maybe they'll behave better.
Mr. Krabs! You know we don't treat our customers like that. [Mr. Krabs is stunned] It says right here, in the Krusty Krab manual. [clears throat and reads] "The customer is always right, when they have money."
Oh! Such wise and beautiful words. Thanks for reminding me, SpongeBob.
I'm here to serve, Mr. Krabs.
[sees an angry mob with police cars around Patrick's rock; deflatedly] Patrick, you gotta hide! There's an angry mob coming for you. They're here.
They done busted my dome!
They wrecked me up!
They got pictures of me naked!
No one wants to see your moles.
Ew!
Officer! [grabs Officer John and pushes him to Rube] That guy's camera took pictures of me Krabby Patty ingredients. And I want that film, before Plankton gets it!
[Officer John pushes Mr. Krabs aside and grabs Rube's camera. He opens it and sees Plankton already inside of it, but the camera itself appears to not have any film in it]
Way ahead of you, Krabs. But there's no film in this camera at all.
Huh?
That's strange.
[Everyone looks at Rube in confusion]
Sorry for the misunderstandin', everybody, but I didn't take any pictures today. I don't even have a camera.
[The camera disappears, with Plankton falling to the ground which surprises everyone]
[shocked] Huh?!
In fact... [waves his arms as his voice fades] I'm not even here. [disappears completely and everyone gasps in a shocking surprise]
[nervously] Um...uh... [waves his hands in the air; it turns out that Rube was nothing more than an illusion] And we're backing away, and backing away, and backing away!
[Everyone backs away in fear and runs off. The screen fades back into "The Tidal Zone"]
You see? I told you. Things always get weird in "The Tidal Zone." [cackling]
[appears in "The Tidal Zone" and takes pictures] Amazing! [floats away as the episode comes to an end]
[The customers stomp their feet to the music. Outside, the rain starts wearing out the mud, and so the Krusty Krab begins to sink in. Meanwhile, Squidward is still sleeping, oblivious to the fact that the Krusty Krab is sinking in. Everyone upstairs still continues to dance as the original Krusty Krab sinks into the mud. Suddenly, the rain stopped and out comes a rainbow. Everyone comes outside happy]
Hooray! We're not on the roof anymore!
You know, after all that dancing and partying today, tomorrow's gonna feel like starting a new business!
And I'm looking forward to getting in on the ground floor with you!
[Mr. Krabs, SpongeBob, and the customers laugh]
[wakes up from his nap and looks at his watch] Time to go home already? [jumps off his bed and heads to the door, but bumps into dirt] Ow. [screams as dirt floods the entire bottom floor of the original Krusty Krab, trapping him as the episode ends]
[speaking through walkie-talkie] Come in, base. We found the trash flingers.
[The purple trash inspector grabs a mop and pokes Squidward]
Ow. Ugh? Ugh. Ow.
[picks up a blob of trash with a stick] Mm-hmm. [sniffs the trash and tastes it] Just as I thought. Trying to save money on trash bags.
I don't know what you're talking about, sir.
You call us Trash Inspector, not sir! We didn't go to garbage school for nothing!
[show off their rings] Go Fighting Filthies!
Whatever you sir, inspector.
What I say is... [puts on a soda can shaped judge wig] You have been found guilty of willful cheapskatery and flagrant trash flinging.
Your sentence is to collect all the garbage in Bikini Bottom using that. [points to a baby] Uh... that one. [points to a garbage truck]
Whatever you say, inspectorers.
[A bus pulls over at the Krusty Krab, now the Krusty Plankton. Lily Plankton comes out and meets up with Plankton and Karen.]
Hi, Grandma. Happy birthday.
Nice to see you again, Grandma Plankton.
[lifts her glasses] Ugh. Who invited C-Pee-Eww? [laughs]
[feels rejected] All right, I tried. [she leaves angrily, running Plankton over]
Owuh! [unsticks his squished body from the road] Let me help you with your bag, Grandma. [gets smacked in the face by Lily's purse] Ouch! [escorts his grandmother into the restaurant] Well, here we are, Grandma. Welcome to the Krusty Plankton. I named it after you.
[pinches Plankton's cheek] Oh, well, aren't you a sweet grandson? [sees SpongeBob and Mr. Krabs] Who are they?
They're just my employees, Grandma. Meet SpongeBob and Eugene.
Hello, Grandma Plankton.
They look like very nice boys, and I'll bet they're even nicer when they're working.
You heard Grandma! We ain't running a welcome wagon here! Get back to work!
[SpongeBob runs back and forth until he jumps back into the kitchen.]
[chuckles] Yeah, sure thing, Plankton. [laughs until Plankton pushes a bucket of cleaning supplies onto Mr. Krabs, making him fall flat on his face on the floor]
[pokes Mr. Krabs' eye] That's Mr. Plankton to you, busboy.
Good morning, Krusty crew! Ready to cook up a new batch of Krabby Patties? Er... [sees SpongeBob and Squidward injured] Why are you two smoldering?!
We're sorry, Mr. Krabs!
[covers SpongeBob's mouth] No, he's delirious! He doesn't know what he's saying.
[pushes Squidward away] No! Mr. Krabs deserves the truth. We accidentally threw away the Krabby Patty formula and Plankton found it!!! We tried to steal it back, but we failed!!!!! [sobs]
[gets raging and smoke steams out of his eyestalks] YOU DID WHAT!?!??!??!?! PLANKTON STOLE ME FORMULER!!!????!!?
[he and SpongeBob nod their heads] That's what he said. Yeah.
[calmly] Then I'll just have to steal it back. [walks over to the Chum Bucket] Hmm. Uh-huh. [punches a hole through the wall and grabs the secret formula from inside] Oh. [kisses the bottle] Don't worry. Papa's here.
Hooray for SpongeBob! He's our hero!
[The townsfolk cheer. But their cheering shakes the ladder even more.]
No! Ahh! Ohh--ow!
[The ladder crumbles and all of the trash as well as SpongeBob, Old Man Jenkins, and the townsfolk are sent crashing down to Bikini Bottom. The city is now a complete mess with trash.]
[pops out from the trash, grabs a bottle cap and a fork, and stands on Nat Peterson's head] I'm King Neptune! King of the seven seas, the lakes, rivers, puddles... [spits saliva into a spittoon] And spit too! I'm the king of spit!
[off-screen] So you're the king of spit? [thunder roars]
[nervously] Uh-oh.
[Out from the clouds, the real King Neptune appears on his chariot and he's not very happy.]
"Uh-oh" is right.
[Old Man Jenkins stands scared as Nat Peterson, upon seeing the real King Neptune, whimpers in fear. He grabs a suitcase and runs away. King Neptune ignites his trident and zaps Old Man Jenkins, burning him to a crisp.]
I smell like toast. Am I breakfast? [bites off his hand] Needs jelly.
[comes by and notices the pile of trash. He also notices SpongeBob's hands sticking out from underneath] Hmm? [pulls out a mortally wounded SpongeBob] Ooh, well, look at that. Someone threw away a good SpongeBob standee. [laughs and throws SpongeBob in his truck-load of SpongeBob-standees] Yagh! [closes the trunk] Oof! [climbs in the truck] Ugh. [drives away with his truck, carrying SpongeBob and the standees inside]
They called me a hero.
Abrasive SpongeBobTom Kenny · 691 quotes
PatrickBill Fagerbakke · 344 quotes
SquidwardRodger Bumpass · 334 quotes
PPlankton138 quotes
SandyCarolyn Lawrence · 76 quotes
KarenJill Talley · 44 quotes
Mrs. PuffMary Jo Catlett · 37 quotes
French NarratorTom Kenny · 32 quotes
GaryTom Kenny · 30 quotes
PatchyTom Kenny · 23 quotes
PearlLori Alan · 22 quotes
FredMr. Lawrence · 19 quotes
These quotes come from Wikiquote's SpongeBob SquarePants pages and are available under the Creative Commons Attribution-ShareAlike License.
