PatrickI don't know what a pink plonker is, but I don't like it! [punches Animatronic Hieronymus with his tongue, knocking his head off]
AHAnimatronic Hieronymus Glove
Aaaaaaaaah!
Patrick
[attaches himself to Animatronic Hieronymus's body] Ooh! Hey! I like this body better than mine... it comes with pockets!
AHAnimatronic Hieronymus Glove
I like my new body too! [walks up using Patrick's body which he struggles to control] But I still want that head! [tries to fight Patrick]
Patrick
I said I was sorry, you weirdo! [they continue fighting, and knock each other's heads off. The heads keep fighting on the ground and SpongeBob jumps to avoid them while the toddler laughs and claps]
HGHieronymus Glove
Enough! [the heads stop fighting, and the real Hieronymus Glove, stuck in a block of ice, rolls up to them while a pair of servants sweep the ground in front of him] No, no, this won't do at all! Put those heads back on their bodies post-haste! [the servants toss their brooms aside and walk towards the group] Splendid!
SPSpongeBob and Patrick
Wow! [the servants put Patrick's head back on his body] Are you the real Hieronymus Glove?
AHAnimatronic Hieronymus Glove
[the servants put Animatronic Hieronymus's head back on his body] No, he's not, I'm the real Hieronymus Glove!
HGHieronymus Glove
Hahahaha, splendid! Do wipe that one's memory bank before he does more damage to my park. Thank you! [one of the servants whacks Patrick's head with a giant wrench] Not him, the other one!
AHAnimatronic Hieronymus Glove
Hmm? [the servant whacks Animatronic Hieronymus's head with the wrench] Ow! Re-re-re-re-re-re-re-re-re-- and that's why we wear gloves on our hands and not our knees! Haha... [powers down and falls over. The servants catch him and carry him away]
HGHieronymus Glove
Splendid! I'm afraid I'm the real Hieronymus Glove, and I'm at your service.
SPSpongeBob and Patrick
We love your gloves!
HGHieronymus Glove
Splendid! And since being terrorized by our robots has never been Glove World policy, you are all hereby released from Glove Jail!
SPSpongeBob and Patrick
We've been pardoned! Splendid!
HGHieronymus Glove
Splendid! And for proving yourselves to be unselfish and kind, I'm going to give all of Glove World to the both of you!
SPSpongeBob and Patrick
Ahhhhhh! [the servants weld crowns to SpongeBob and Patrick's heads] Really?
HGHieronymus Glove
Of course not! Hahahahaha! I may be cryogenically frozen, but I'm not a loony! [they all laugh, and the floor rises up to take them back to Glove World as Hieronymus begins singing] ♪Well, that concludes our show and as you can see, there still is nothing quite like gloves!
Until we meet again for a shopping spree, where I hope you buy all kinds of gloves to love!
With the handy help of SpongeBob and Patrick, we defeated my crazy robot head!
Now that the twit is gone...♪
AHAnimatronic Hieronymus Glove
[singing] ♪Glove World can carry on!♪
HGHieronymus Glove
[singing] ♪And the toddler can go to bed. Goodnight!♪
[SpongeBob and Patrick fall asleep as the curtains go down. The toddler jumps out of their arms and runs off, waking them up.]
Patrick
Hey! [they go running after him]
Come back here, little guy!
Patrick
I saved you a Ham Fist! [the second act, and the entire episode, ends with a cut to black]
[The Goofy Manager is in front of Goofy Goober's, looking through some keys on a ring.]
[leaning in] Good morning!
GMGoofy Manager
[screams, scared] I don't carry cash! [freezes, then opens his eyes] Huh?[SpongeBob and Patrick are wearing peanut sleeping bags, in front of a tent and burnt-out campfire.]
GMGoofy Manager
[disappointed] It's you two.
Patrick
We camped out all night to see the Gooey Sneakers.
Goofy Scoopers. [steps out of sleeping bag]
Patrick
Yeah, them! [pokes head, making a hollow sound] They're gonna write on my head!
GMGoofy Manager
[sneaky] Well... about that... [SpongeBob and the manager go inside. Patrick doesn't move, and SpongeBob drags him and his sleeping bag inside.] The Goofy Scoopers are over. Too old fashioned. The kids want a new sound.
SPSpongeBob and Patrick
A new sound!?
GMGoofy Manager
[gestures to stage] That's right, I brought in an act you're going to flip over![The curtains open, revealing a robot of an ice cream cone wearing sunglasses, headphones, and a backwards cap. He stands at a stereo with a laptop on it and an insignia with two ice cream cones, labeled "2" and "S", on the side.] Say hello to... DJ 2 Sc00pz! [DJ 2 Sc00pz presses a button on his laptop. The background behind the stage shows a techno tunnel as EDM music plays. Kids run up and start dancing.]
[covering his ears] Sorry, but the Goofy Scoopers are the only ice cream themed musical robot act [folds his arms] we'll ever love.[SpongeBob opens his eyes to see Patrick dancing to DJ 2 Sc00pz's music.
Patrick
[rhythmic grunting]
Patrick, don't give in to its seductive [imitates a robot] womp-womps and wub-wubs. Please, Mr. Manager, you have to tell us where the Scoopers are! [a thought bubble appears, growing and changing with each location listed] Are they playing at a coffee house? Are they playing the Bikini Bottom Bowl? Or on a world tour?
GMGoofy Manager
No! [waves the thought bubble away] Oh, my, no. [points behind him] I threw those old robots in the garbage. They're never playing anywhere again.
Patrick
[pounds his fists] Let's get him!
W-w-wait, Patrick. We're here to make friends with him, don't you remember?
Patrick
Obviously, I do not.
[rubbing his chin] How are we gonna get him to play the show? [gets an idea] I got it! We'll appeal to his intellect with sound reasoning and convincing arguments!
[SpongeBob and Patrick grovel and beg in front of Clem, who is inflating balloons.]
Patrick
[crying] We need you!
[crying] You gotta come back, you just gotta!
[ties balloon] You can cool it, cats. Whatever your scheme is, I'm in. [gives balloon to SpongeBob] Just get me out of this crazy circus. I'm terrified of clowns, man.
[A circus tent opens, revealing a clown with a yellow eyes and an evil smile, as honking and evil laughter is heard. Clem shudders.]
Well, that's great, Mr. Clem Clam, because tomorrow night, [puts his hand around Patrick] we're getting the band back together. Reunion show tomorrow night at Goofy Goober's. So far, you're the only one we've found, though.
You know, the circus's least flexible contortionist saw Bongos Bear [points right] at that massage place downtown, man.
[walks to SpongeBob's house with ectoplasm all over him. He wipes it off and bangs on the door] ScumBob! Puketrick! You blithering fools better hand over Pigulon, or I'll chug, and I'll glug, and I'll belch your house down! [growls]
Patrick
[as Pigulon, through SpongeBob's house] Nobody's home!
Hmm? [growls while he steams mad. He takes out a bottle of Fizz Bomb Cola] Time for some Fizz Bomb burp fuel. [drinks it and his stomach boils; he burps down SpongeBob's house. Gary falls on SpongeBob, and they run to Patrick's rock] I said hand over Pigulon, or I'll chug, and I'll glug, and I'll belch your house down again!
Patrick
[his lips are through the rock] Good luck. I built this rock entirely out of rock. [blows raspberry at Bubble Bass]
[growls, then he pulls out another bottle of Fizz Bomb Cola and a bottle of hot sauce] Let's turn up the heat. [drinks both of it and his stomach boils; he burps down Patrick's rock]
Patrick
They just don't make rocks the way they used to.
Patrick
Ooh! My new rock is finally here![Patrick slides down from his rock and runs over to open it. Patrick rips off the wrapping paper whole and the package is revealed to be a pink rock with green polka dots on it with a bronze arrow-shaped weather vane on top, then puts his hands on his hips while looking suspicious] Hold on! [Patrick jumps up onto the rock and puts his glasses on] Polka dots?! I ordered plaid! [Patrick takes his glasses off and throws them away.] You'll have to take it back, Mr. Mailman.
MMailman
[still struggling to hold up the rock] Ugh! Back? [The rock crushes the mailman and letters come flying out. Patrick lifts up the rock and the mailman is flattened into the ground with black eyes.]
Patrick
Mr. Mailman?
MMailman
My back! [Patrick picks up the mailman and puts his hat to his mouth and blows into it like a balloon. The mailman is back to normal and Patrick puts him back down feet first on the ground and the mailman is groaning in pain]
Patrick
[while adjusting the mailman's hat] You okay, buddy?
I1Incidental 154
Gotta... deliver... mail.
Patrick
You are in no shape to deliver anything, fella. Just relax and [throws the mailman to Patrick's rock] crash at my place. I'll deliver your mail for you today.
CClerk
Okay everybody, say "I love my family."
[as Patrick continues crying] I'd rather not.
CClerk
[aggressively] Say it!
SSSpongeBob and Squidward
[elatedly and monotonously, respectively] I love my family. [As the picture is being taken, SpongeBob hugs Squidward, Squidward grunts, and Patrick cheers happily. The photo prints out to be live action versions of the trio. Bubble wipe to the next scene with passengers getting on the plane.]
Patrick
[sits on Squidward] I think you're on my seat, pop.
[Squidward pulls himself out. SpongeBob zooms in, pushing Squidward to the middle seat.]
And I'll take the isle! [laughs]
PSPatrick and SpongeBob
Daddy's in the middle!
Oh, no! I am not suffering a whole flight between you two barnacle brains! At least give me the aisle. [he switches seats with SpongeBob]
GGrandPat
Ah... It's good to be back home, where it's normal.
Patrick
[offscreen] Hey, GrandPat. [pan to reveal GrandPat's entire family have wings and eyes similar to flies] Whatcha watching?
GGrandPat
[screams, but then relaxes] Eh, close enough.
And so, we leave things a little bit weird. But that's how we like it here, in The Tidal Zone. [his arm comes through the TV screen and turns it off] Au revoir.
GGrandPat
Hey! I was watching that!
These pancakes are delicious, Sandy, but what do you call this sweet stuff?
That's maple syrup, It's kinda like jelly that comes from trees. [Patrick eats some pancakes before saying.]
Patrick
Tree jelly? Gross.[camera widens to a jellyfish between Patrick and Squidward] I prefer mine on tap. [extracts jelly from the jellyfish's tentacle on his pancakes, The jellyfish then stings Squidward painfully and flies away.]
Welcome to Bikini Bottom's very first Arbor Day celebration.
Patrick
Barbor day?
[comes out his hair and beard] Well, I can use a trim.
I think she said Harbor day, to celebrate old navy swabs like meself.
It’s ARRR-BOR day, It's a day to celebrate the joy of trees.
[walks upfront to Sandy] But Sandy, you've got the only tree in town.
[The episode opens with a wide shot of Avocondo Acres.]
Ah, Avocondo Acres, Bikini Bottom's premier retirement community. This is where we find Harold and Margaret, the parents of the ocean's most exceptional multicellular organism, SpongeBob SquarePants.
[sniffs] Harold, do you smell that? It smells like something...rotting. [The avocado mush from the home lands on Harold.]
It's begun! We better run! [Harold takes Margaret in his arms and they run out of their rotting avocado home.]
EFElderly Fish
I tell people to rub their homes with lemon juice and wrap it in plastic! But do they listen?
Oh, Harold, what will we do?
Well, we'll just have to grow a new home. And in the meantime, we can stay with our son.
[Harold and Margaret drive off in their boat, while their avocado sits in a giant cup full of water. The scene transitions to SpongeBob's house.]
Take cover, Gary! Watch this! I jump up and down, the soda bottles pop their corks, and send me dangerously around the room! I may not survive. [he laughs, then his phone rings] Hello? Hi Mom, hi Dad! Your house? Oh no! Stay with me? Why of course you can! Guess what, Gary? Mom and Dad are coming over to stay at our place for the very first time! [gary meows] I just thought of something. My parents haven't seen me in a while. They'll be expecting their son to be a little more, well, adult. Grown-up. Mature. And look at me! [A close-up of SpongeBob is seen with a bandage on his forehead and his helmet is squished on the side] And look at this place! It's a filthy mess!
"[The room is shining, and the scene transitions to SpongeBob cleaning his wall. Patrick appears where SpongeBob has cleaned.]"
Patrick
Peek-a-boo!
Clean! "[transitions to SpongeBob vacuuming.]"
[SpongeBob vacuums up the floor, revealing Patrick again under the floor.]
Patrick
I see you!
So clean! [transitions to SpongeBob cleaning his toilet]
[SpongeBob pulls Patrick out of the toilet]
Patrick
We've gotta stop meeting like this.
Patrick
"[appears behind SpongeBob]" You almost done?
Yahoo! Masked luchador wrestling!
[blows raspberry] How juvenile. [SpongeBob sits in the stands, between his parents.] Well, I guess this is all right. It shouldn't be too wild, just sitting here, watching.
[gives him the peanut bag] Uh, we're not here to watch.
[stands up] We're here to wrestle.
WAWrestling Announcer
It's tag team time! [buzzer sounds] Los Diablos vs. Madre y Padre! [Harold and Margaret put on wrestling uniforms and jump into the ring. SpongeBob is worried.]
[The opening bell rings, and wrestlers pound their fists together. Margaret does stretches. Harold runs in place, winds up a punch, and runs. The wrestler bounces him into the ground. Margaret tags him and gets tripped by another wrestler. She bounces off the ropes and into Harold. One Diablo grab Harold and play him like an accordion, and the other spins Margaret around and smashes her into the floor. SpongeBob tries to eat peanuts but reaches his hand through the bag and chews on his hand. One Diablo kicks Harold into the air and another bounces Margaret into the ropes. SpongeBob chews the bag and rocks back and forth in his seat. Los Diablos run into each other and smash Harold and Margaret together.]
Mom, Dad! I'm coming! [puts the bag over his head and jumps into the ring, only to see everything empty] Uh, Mom? Dad? [Harold and Margaret are in the stands, cheering him on.]
We're rooting for you, kiddo!
WAWrestling Announcer
For our next bout, it's El Muerte vs. Señor Peanuts Bag!
[Pounding footsteps are heard. A wrestler in a skeleton outfit roars and pounds the ground, then runs forward.]
[screams like a woman] Whoa![screams in regular and gets chased around] Mommy, Daddy!
[El Muerte stops and catches SpongeBob as he runs around, making him spin. El Muerte stomps on Patrick and bends his legs.]
No más! No más! [gets grabbed by Harold] Yay! Whoa!
Now, wasn't that fun? [An injured SpongeBob walks off. Harold, Margaret, and SpongeBob drive away.]
Whoo-hoo! [El Muerte gets up and takes his helmet off, revealing him to be Patrick.]
Patrick
[grunts] Where'd that peanut bag guy go? [stomach grumbles] I'm hungry. [A hot dog-themed wrestler approaches Patrick.]
HDHot Dog Wrestler (Master Udon)
How 'bout a hot dog?
[SpongeBob repeatedly bounces up and down. Gary goes next to Margaret, who pets him. SpongeBob launches the soda bottles and flies around, knocking over furniture and putting holes in the house. After a burst of smoke, the house is completely destroyed. The door falls off, showing Harold, Margaret, and Gary hiding behind the couch. Empty soda bottles fall from the sky. SpongeBob, asleep, gently falls down. Harold and Margaret catch him.]
Aw, the boy's asleep, all tuckered out. [checks clock] Well, our new avocondo should be ripe right now. He'll have to stay with us until he can regrow his pineapple.
[carrying Gary, skating away with him] I wonder when he'll really grow up and be mature.
Hopefully not too soon. Am I right, dear? [Patrick, still in his wrestling outfit, runs up with a hot dog.]
Patrick
[panting] Señor Peanuts Bag! I want satisfaction! [pauses] Or peanuts... [iris out pauses on him] But rather peanuts. [iris out continues]
Patrick
[while sliding down backwards] Don't worry SpongeBob, it's just Bread Man's Hill.
That's not Bread Man's Hill, it's [points to the hill as his pupils turn into skulls] "Dead Man's Hill"!
Patrick
Wait, is that worse? It sounds worse? [he looks down to the hill, with numerous spikes and coral] It is worst! [turns around and dodges a tree.]
[In Patrick's POV, a cyclist is shown bicycling up the hill then drifts to the left, a cave dweller roars at Patrick but he rides under it, and a ship zooms by with a skeleton holding a sword cackling]
Patrick
SpongeBob, I'm doing it! [laughing] I'm bicycling!
SpongeBob SquarePants · 1,068 quotes
