[Jess walks up to Rory as she is sitting on the bridge]
Dean's a jerk yelling at you like that, breaking up in front of everyone. The guy's a total jerk.
RoryNo, he's not..he was right...everything he said, all those things about you and me, all those things about me...lying to him, messing with his head. He was right. [pause, she looks up at Jess] Well, wasn't he?....Fine, he was right about me then, now go away.
[Jess takes a breath]
He was right about...all of it.
Rory
So what now?
You definitely broken up with Dean?
Rory
Yeah, I'm definitely broken up with Dean.
I have to go take care of something then.
Oh wow. I guess this means there really isn’t a Dean anymore, huh?
Rory
Yeah, that and it broke in the shower this morning. Though I probably would’ve taken it off anyway.
Or Jess would’ve done it for you.
Rory
What did that mean?
It just meant Jess wouldn’t want you wearing another guy’s bracelet.
Rory
Or that Jess is a thief and he would’ve stolen it.
It does work on both levels, doesn’t it?
Rory
So this is how it’s gonna be from now on?
Rory
You like Dean and you hate Jess.
Rory
Jess will always be the evil guy who mouthed off to you and wrecked my car and Dean will always be the perfect guy who would come over and change the water bottle.
Aw, I forgot about the water bottle.
Rory
Mom.
Rory, I said nothing. I didn’t mean what you thought I meant about Jess. I’m trying to be supportive about this.
Rory
How supportive?
Supportive. You know, go team.
Rory
I’m serious, I wanna know how it’s gonna be. Like, can I invite him over?
Of course you can invite him over.
Rory
Well, can he actually come into the house?
Yes, he can come into the house
Rory
Are you going to talk to him?
I'll at least match him grunt for grunt.
Rory
Okay. Now, let's say he's in the house and there's a fire and you can either save him or your shoes - which is it?
That depends, did he start the fire?
Rory
Yeah, here we are. So, tell me, what’s your decision about smoking that depending on?
Rory
When?
[They kiss]
Rory
I’m glad you didn’t smoke it.
Rory
Yeah.
[they kiss again]
Well, whatever else happens between us, at least we know that part works.
Rory
I have to go.
What? Did I do something or –
Rory
No, no. This was. . . you were – are. . .it was wonderful, and I look forward to many similar occurrences in the future, but right now, I have to go. Understand?
Rory
It’s more fun that way, isn’t it?
Rory
Who are the rosary beads for?
Rory
What do you need rosary beads for?
Rory
They're for prayer.
Well, pray they match my blue suit.
Rory
They've just upgraded you to a queen-size bed, jacuzzi tub, junior suite in hell.
They burnt my fries, forgot to give me an extra side of barbecue sauce, the jeep is making that crunchy sound again, and I have to spend my evening making elf ears for Aaron Thompson's Lord of the Rings party.
Rory
Grandma broke into my dorm and redid the entire common room in $25,000 worth of furniture and stereo equipment.
Well, you could come out and say, "Grandma, this furniture is very nice. I appreciate the gesture, but this is a dorm room, and I cannot guarantee that the other people will love it as much as I do, and I worry about expensive equipment getting stolen, and it's just maybe too much right now."
Rory
That sounds good.
Okay. And then my mother will say, "Rory, your grandfather and I are paying for you to go to Yale. We are enabling you to have this rarefied education, and you're being ungrateful and small-minded, and I resent it. I am hurt on a level you will not be able to understand until you yourself have a daughter or a granddaughter who will cut your heart out the way you've just cut mine out, and I hope that small veneer of independence that you've extracted from this incident is worth the complete and total alienation of the grandparents who have done nothing but love you and thought of you only."
Rory
Or I could keep the furniture.
And take heart in knowing that when it comes to controlling a person, my mother targeted my soul, my independence, and my entire future, and at least with you, she threw in an ottoman.
Remember in The Godfather, Michael telling Sonny how he was gonna kill Tattaglia and Captain McCluskey in that Italian restaurant? He lays out the whole thing very calmly, very unemotionally, 'cause that's what you do in business.
Rory
Yeah, but then he went and shot two guys in the head.
[about planting bulbs] Oh, and just you wait 'til spring. You're gonna wake up one morning, walk out, and pow - color coming out of your yin-yang! I'll see you girls tomorrow. [goes into her house]
I'm going to have color coming out of my yin-yang.
Rory
Then maybe you'll finally get a man.
Rory
More broccoli, Grandpa?
Absolutely. Staves off the cancer.
You really should eat more green things, Lorelai.
I plan to eat a five-dollar bill later tonight.
Rory
Oh, have you seen the new twenties? They have a little peach color in 'em.
Peach, perfect. I'll eat a new twenty, I'll have my fruits and vegetables.
Remember when I was a kid, my mother showed me the special jug that's been passed down in my family for years and years in a long-standing Kim tradition that she is personally going to present to the boy I'm going to wed?
Rory
Oh, my God. The marriage jug?
Rory
She's sending Dave the marriage jug? What does that mean?
I'm guessing it means she's reserving a hall and ordering that "Stations of the Cross" ice sculpture.
Gilmore Girls · 747 quotes
