Roger quotes from American Dad!

Roger

What, no way! Wait, why is this wrong? Next to "Miranda Rights," I wrote, "Miranda has the right to a decent man who will help her raise her baby." Are these questions not about Sex and the City?

Roger

I'll have three twelve-year-old boys, no MSG.

Roger

Oh my God, another fey, pansexual, alcoholic non-human! I've been replaced!

"Sons of Tucson: New on FOX"? When was this on? I watch FOX all the time. I never saw this!

Roger

Well, that was quite a ride Wheels, but I think I got us there.

Roger

Hey, I see Hayley! [It is shown that Roger has actually seen an obese Korean man in a nearby boat, with similar clothes and hair to Hayley.] Don't marry Jeff! Case, closed.

Roger

[as a bride, with Annabelle] Take a picture. It'll last longer.

Roger

My wine fridge! I had my cocaine in there!

Roger

(picking up a wig) : Thank God this one survived. I can still go to cowboy weddings.

Roger

Ah, you dumb son of a bitch! No, that's not Roland Chang. You're doing great!

Roger

You know what kid I wanted to kill? The youngest daughter in Mrs. Doubtfire. Hated her face. By the time I could get a good shot at her, she had grown up and turned into nothing.

Roger

Damn, I look good. Tilda Swinton good.

Roger

[high-pitched voice after breathing in a helium balloon] When I was a little girl, Grover Cleveland was president.

Roger

I think I grabbed the helium neck.

Roger

Crap, I must've grabbed the helium tank!

Roger

I just want to be as close to you as possible... Like John and Yoko... You're Yoko.