Toshi quotes from American Dad!

Steve

Toshi, you have a video camera, right?

[subtitled] You assume this because I am Asian. You are a racist.

Steve

Wow, that's a lot of words for of course.

Steve

Snot, remember that time I gave you half an orange?

Snot

Yeah.

Steve

Well, then let me put a firecracker up your ass!

Klaus

No, I don't remember you remember you giving me half an orange, so no, you can't.

Steve

Why does everybody hate me so much?!

Roger

Hey, guess what? I'm flame retardant.

Steve

Can I blow you up with firecrackers?

Roger

I don't see why not.

Steve

Awesome!

Steve

I will now recklessly blow up my cousin, Roger.

Steve

For good measure, I'm gonna set the whole thing off with this. The Finger Blaster.

フィンガーブラスターほど女の子を夢中にさせるものはありません。[Japanese to English translation: Nothing gets a girl going quite like a Finger Blaster.]

Steve

Ah! My thumb! I blew off my thumb!

Barry

We're gonna get in trouble! Ruuuuun!

Roger

Okay, golden opportunity. Say "Charlie, they took my thumb." [beat] Eric Roberts, Pope of Greenwich Village. You're a lot of fun.

He's not going to have a bar mitzvah. Because I'm taking him before the Beth Din!

Snot

The Beth Din?

What's the Beth Din? I don't know what that is, etc.

Steve

What's the Beth Din?

The leader of a group of Jewish elders. Yours is a rich culture which we despise.

Once the Beth Din hears what you did, not only will you be kicked out of our temple, no other temple will take you. You'll never be bar mitzvah-ed. Doomed to walk the earth for the rest of your days as a child. [walks away]

Snot

[horrified] The rest of my days as a child?

[in Japanese, subtitled] You think that's bad? I have to spend the rest of my days haunted by the ghost of a 12th-century shogun warrior.

[in Japanese, subtitled] You know they can't understand you.

[in Japanese, subtitled] You're right, Minamoto. Today's clam chowder is quite good.

Steve

Wow, uncensored nudity! This game must be from Japan!

[in Japanese] Unlikely. Those are women, not underage schoolgirls.

Holy Methmoly!

Jeepers, a methhead!

Steve

I can't believe my dad ditched us here.

[in Japanese] And he dishonored us by taking our cell phones.

Snot

Guys, how long do you think we can last out here?

Barry

I don't know. But if we're gonna die, I'm not goin' out a virgin.

Snot

Well, if trees count, then I'm Wilt Chamberlain.

Look, this vape pen isn't gonna smoke itself behind the gym. The "F" stands.

Steve

F? F? F? F? F?! F?! F?! F?!

[in Japanese] He's gonna lose his shit!

Barry

Don't worry, Barry know what to do! [He grabs Snot's Zoloft, tackles Steve and dumps several pills in his mouth]

Steve

[slowly] Now it's just gonna take me longer to finish freaking out.

[in Japanese] This day has been badass.

Steve

It sure has, Toshi, my friend. Hey! I understand Tosh!

[in Japanese] Finally! Now that we can communicate, there is something I must tell you... I absolutely adore the Pirates of the Caribbean movies.

Steve

Oh. Cool.

Barry

I feel like I’ve seen something like this done before.

Klaus

No, no, it’s all original. These are fresh ideas, obviously, Barry. Can you lean in a little? I want to match the image I have in my mind.

Snot

What a shutter slut.

[in Japanese] When did we all get jealous about this?