Logan Reese quotes from Zoey 101

Zoey

(to Logan) Are you sure you gave the taxi driver the right directions?

Logan

Mystic Beach is exactly 57 miles north of PCA.

Dustin

No, Mystic Beach is south of PCA!

Zoey

Dustin, are you sure?

Dustin

Who are you going to trust: me or pretty boy?

Chase

Can you at least turn the volume down!

Logan

Why don't you turn your mouth down! Eh!

Chase

Michael!

Logan

What's up?

Michael

My boys!

Logan

So, how was your summer, man?

Chase

Yeah, I've missed seeing your freakish face every day!

Michael

Heh, yeah, and I've missed your big bushy hair. Hey, did it get bushier?

Chase

It's possible.

Chase

Good night, Michael.

Michael

Sleep tight, Chase.

Logan

You guys are the worst.

Dustin

[crying] Soooooo close.

Lola

I doubt it. This shirt will always be hot.

Logan

Yeah, it will.

Lola

Try not to drool.

Zoey

(angrily) You're unbelievable!

Logan

Thank you.

Zoey

Are you trying to scare them to death?

Logan

Yeah, pretty much.

Chase

(trying to scare Zoey and Nicole) Blah!

Zoey

Oh, hi, Chase!

Nicole

Hi, Chase!

Chase

What, you weren't scared?

Zoey

Why would we be scared of a magician?

Chase

A magician? No, no. I'm a vampire!

Logan

Hey, Mr. Magic!

Chase

I am a vampire! You guys wanna see my receipt for the costume?

Logan

(on television) Hello, my name is Logan Reese.

Zoey

I'm Zoey Brooks.

Logan

Today we're gonna talk about some interesting topics. First: Girls in sports. Now, I think it's fine if girls wanna have their own little sports teams, but they should not be allowed to play on the guys teams! Zoey?

Zoey

Yeah, you're right...

Logan

Huh?

Zoey

I said, "You're right"!

Logan

Okay... Let's move on to our next topic then... Oh, yeah. Ordering at restaurants. I say girls take way too much time to order food. (with a girly voice) "Uh, I'm a girl. I'll have a chopped salad, but I want the lettuce on the side!" Guys are just like "Give me a cheeseburger!" End of story! Zoey?

Zoey

I agree...

Logan

Okay... For our next topic, let's talk about... Eating kittens! I feel people should eat more kittens! Eating little kitty cats for breakfast! Do you agree with that Zoey, hmm?

Chase

(on the Chase and Michael show) Would a woman make a better President of the United States than a man?

Logan

Absolutely not!

Zoey

You're an idiot!

Logan

A woman can not be President of the United States!

Zoey

Name one reason!

Logan

Because girls are too emotional! Everytime she gets a pimple, she'll cry and start a war with Switzerland!

Logan

Okay, tell you what. We'll take you to see Restless in Love, but you girls are paying.

Actually, you know what I'd rather see?

Logan

What?

The jerk in the fountain.

Logan

Jerk in the fountain? What are you- [she pushes him into the fountain] OK, that was ridiculous!

(running out of the sushi bar with a fire extinguisher in one hand and a clipboard in the other) Fire! Fire! Fire! Fire! Kazu, your grill's on fire!

Kazu

Fire?! (He runs up the stairs. The others try to follow him until he stops them) No, stay back! Pull the fire alarm!

Michael

Where's the fire alarm?

Over there! (Zoey, Nicole, Lola, Chase, Logan, and Michael run to the fire alarm. Kazu runs up the stairs to Coach Keller)

Lola

Fire!

Logan

Oh, my goodness! (Zoey pulls a fire alarm. In the sushi bar, the fire is spreading. Morning comes, and the firefighters have put out the fire and are carrying everything out. Chase and Nicole come up to Dean Rivers and a depressed Kazu)

Chase

Morning, Kazu.

Nicole

How bad was the fire?

Michael

You two people are gonna lo... not win the bet.

Logan

No. You will... not win. For I... can go longer... without... invoking... the letter... after R.

Chase

Wrong. I... will win the bet... for one of you... will... talk... the bad letter... before me do. Be-before me. No need for the do.

Hey! Chase! Michael, Logan. You guys have been whispering this whole class.

Chase

I-I-I apologize.

Logan

Ha!

Chase

"Z".

Logan

Oh.

Logan

Did Quinn just walk past here with an alpaca?

Zoey

Yeah, she sure did.

Logan

Weird.

Nicole

Okay, did Michael just run by here wearing a bikini top?

Lola

And a hula skirt?

Chase

Uh-huh.

Logan

He did.

Zoey

Weirder.

Michael

Did you tell Zoey yet?

Chase

Not yet.

Michael

Man, when you gonna tell her?

Chase

Soon.

Michael

You better.

Chase

I'm gonna tell her.

Logan

Tell who what?

Michael

You that you're annoying. [he pushes Logan, and the two start to fight in the hall]