Silvio Dante quotes from The Sopranos

Silvio Dante

You have any idea what Albert kicked up last week?

Paulie Walnuts

Fuck that fuckin' parakeet. I got a relationship with Tony Albert'll never have. No matter how far he sticks his tongue up Tony's ass.

Paulie Walnuts

It's your fault anyway. All this shit started with that Russian prick when I had to go pick up your five grand.

Silvio Dante

You know things might be a little different, Paulie, if you'd accept some responsibility for a change.

Paulie Walnuts

You're a wormy cocksucker, you know that?

Silvio Dante

Ohhhh! I'm just tellin' you how you're bein' fuckin' perceived!

Paulie Walnuts

Just worry about how you're fuckin' perceived! Nobody knows what the future holds, my friend.

Tony Soprano

I tell you, I'm havin' a time. Stay out late. Come home drunk. Fuck anyone I want.

Silvio Dante

Yeah, so whats the difference? (Compared to when Tony was married)

Tony Soprano

I dunno, it's the mindset.

Tony Blundetto

(to Paulie Walnuts, about his hair) You got ta let that dry before you put on a second coat? Fuckin' Grandpa Munster over here.

Silvio Dante

(laughing) Ohhh...

Tony Blundetto

(to Vito Spatafore, about cards) You gonna deal those? They're not candy bars. You can let some of 'em go. (everybody laughs)

Michele Feech La Manna

It's important these young guys know the history.

Silvio Dante

Tell 'em 'bout the time...uh...Tony and Jackie Aprile knocked over your card game. (Feech La Manna sighs) Oh, that he doesn't like ta talk about.

Silvio Dante

(A series of phone conversations) Adriana got caught givin' the big guy a blowjob.

Bobby Baccilieri

And when the paramedics found them, she had his cock still in her mouth.

Hesh Rabkin

Now, statistics show that most single-car fatalities are the result of guys poppin' their load behind the wheel.

Uncle Junior

Apparently, he came all over the sun visor.

Johnny Sack

Tony gets one fifty. Twenty five percent comes from you, the other seventy five percent o' that comes from Hesh.

Phil Leotardo

Jesus Christ...that's like forty grand. You gotta be fuckin' kiddin' me, John.

Johnny Sack

Am I smilin'?

Phil Leotardo

You got some balls kid, I'll give you that much!

Tony Soprano

You'll give me what I tell you to give me!

Johnny Sack

Whoah Tony...

Silvio Dante

Take it easy...take it easy...

Tony Soprano

Fuck that! This ain't the seventies. And I'm not a kid.

Phil Leotardo

Relax, it's an expression.

Tony Soprano

Well, here's another expression. You got five days ta give me my money.

Silvio Dante

His brains are splattered all over the seat.

Paulie Walnuts

Joey Peeps? Couldn't have been too much to clean up.

Tony Soprano

Peeps?! It's a fuckin' nickname! His family name is Pepperelli!

Silvio Dante

They're gonna redo it. Fuckin' Jason. He's dyslexic...

Tony Soprano

What's that got to do with it?

Tony Soprano

First off, let me just say how sorry I am for you're loss. We all are.

Phil Leotardo

Take your fuckin' sorrys, and stick in your ass.

Tony Soprano

I could say nothing. Be a heartless prick.

Phil Leotardo

He tried to talk, he couldn't even say his last words. Anybody ever die in your arms, you cocksucker? A family member, somebody you love?

Tony Soprano

No.

Phil Leotardo

Well give it time. See if I can't make that happen for you.

Silvio Dante

Whoa whoa whoa...

Tony Soprano

Alright, that's enough.

Tony Soprano

Was that fuckin' necessary? He shouldn't even've been here.

Johnny Sack

He's got a right to be here. He's got a right to a lot of things right now.

Tony Soprano

My cousin acted alone, I did not sanction this.

Johnny Sack

The 'lone gunman theory'...

Tony Soprano

You know how close he and Angelo were in the can. He flipped the fuck out!

Johnny Sack

When he whacked Joey Peeps, what flipped him out that time?

Tony Soprano

W-whaddaya want John, whaddaya want me to say?

Johnny Sack

I want your cousin on a fucking spit!

Tony Soprano

I don't know where he is.

Silvio Dante

Nobody does.

Johnny Sack

Fine. Maybe one of your other relatives then...

Christopher Moltisanti

What, I gotta stand here being threatened now?

Silvio Dante

Right, Chrissy-

Tony Soprano

Alright alright alright, nobody's making threats! Look, Tony's in hiding, John.

Johnny Sack

You either deliver that prick to my door, or I will rain a shitstorm down on you and your family like you have never fucking seen. We're done here.

Silvio Dante

I've been your consigliere for a lot of years-

Tony Soprano

Don't go through a fuckin' preamble, just tell me what's on your mind!

Benny Fazio

Fuckin' somethin', this situation, eh?

Silvio Dante

Right.

Christopher Moltisanti

I can't even get down ta Milt's, fence some jewelry.

Benny Fazio

Everybody with eyes in the back o' their head. Shit, I was Tony's driver.

Christopher Moltisanti

It's amazing. You want me ta be honest? The favoritism Tony still shows for our fuckin' cousin after what he's done? What does Tony B. have on this guy? And I'm supposed ta maybe take a bullet for this skeeve.

Silvio Dante

After all your uncle's done for you? I need ta get into specifics?

Silvio Dante

He was a good kid, Raymond.

Tony Soprano

The best.

Paulie Walnuts

At least he went fast. Not like Dick Barone, poor fuck.

Bobby Baccilieri

Dick Barone died?

Silvio Dante

Lou Gehrig's disease.

Christopher Moltisanti

You ever think what a coincidence it is that Lou Gehrig died of Lou Gehrig's disease?

Vito Spatafore

(Vito and Paulie argue in the bathroom while Silvio is on the toilet) I was just sayin', I'm gonna get T's piece of my half to Sil for her. Of the thing.

Paulie Walnuts

Back up there, Bluto. Your half? I did all the heavy liftin'.

Vito Spatafore

You would never heard about it without my information.

Paulie Walnuts

Big help. It was fuckin' mayham. You said the place was empty. Doc says I need an ultrasound on my groin and balls.

Vito Spatafore

Sil, you wanna weigh in here?

Silvio Dante

It breaks half and half. You both kick Tony's to me to deal with.

Paulie Walnuts

I'll have it for you Sil, the whole eighty K.

Vito Spatafore

Ho, ho, ho. Eighty K? How's that twenty percent of a million?

Paulie Walnuts

Have a cookie, you're delirious. It was seven fifty, tops.

Vito Spatafore

Fuck it all, Paulie. Tommy cased that shithole.

Silvio Dante

What's with the fuckin' accountin' out there? That's a hundred grand a piece. You got it? We're lookin' after Carmela.

Paulie Walnuts

No question.

Vito Spatafore

Of course. Sooner than later Paulie.

Paulie Walnuts

I gotta piss first, you want half o' that too?