Verminous Snaptrap quotes from T.U.F.F. Puppy

Dudley

Not for long. [sniffing where Snaptrap is] I smell a rat.

Snaptrap

[sarcastically] Oh, that's super original. Like I haven't heard that one before.

Snaptrap

Looks like we're roomies. By the way, why do they call you crazy horse? Cause you pay full price for movies?

Nope. Just chainsaws. [neighs as he takes out his chainsaw]

[answering the phone] Diabolical Order of Mayhem. We deliver evil in 30 minutes or it's free.

Snaptrap

Hey, it's Snaptrap. I've fallen in love with a lady dog at the laundromat, and I'm resigning as the leader of D.O.O.M. Tell Larry I'll miss him least of all. Snaptrap out… forever. [hangs up]

Hey, everyone. Snaptrap quit! Dibs on his stuff!

Snaptrap

That was hard. They were devastated.

Snaptrap

Are you guys mad about the money thing? Please don't be mad. I couldn't take it if you're mad.

[snapping in annoyance] WE'RE NOT MAD!

Snaptrap

Oh, boy, that's a relief. I'm not calling you liars, which sounded a little mad.

Snaptrap

The grand opening of the new Petropolis Monotrail! And it never would've happened without me.

What did you do?

Snaptrap

I blew up the old Petropolis Monotrail. Then I burned down the library, and robbed a hospital. That was a super fun weekend! [takes out sterile gauze] Sterile gauze, anyone?

Dudley

You can't fight it, Snaptrap! You got the music in you!

Snaptrap

[straining to resist the dance] Must…be…STRONG! [Dudley pushes the dance floor button on the boom box, smashes it on the ground, lighting up the dance floor] Oh, no! GOTTA DANCE!

And the winner of this summer's camp champ award for best camper is, everyone but for Verminious Snaptrap!

Young Snaptrap

This is an outrage! I demand to know why I didn't win!

You bullied the junior campers, cheated at every camp competition, and you blew up the mess hall.

Young Snaptrap

Well, sure! It was nacho night, and I'm allergic to cheese!

[chanting] Snaptrap stinks! Snaptrap stinks!

[chanting] Snaptrap stinks! Snaptrap stinks!

Snaptrap

[gets in Larry's face, angrily] Flashback's over, Larry! [throws Larry out of the bus at the edge of a cliff as he falls while screaming]

[calling out] It's pointy down here!

Snaptrap

I got so angry about losing, I developed a nervous twitch. Luckily, I'm over it. [twitches]

Bird Brain

Well played, Agent Puppy. But I knew it was you all along.

Snaptrap

Yeah, that's why you led that heroic charge into the Ancient Greek trash compactor.

Chameleon

Quit fighting and let's make a run for it!

Kitty

Dudley, it's time to take out the trash!

Chameleon

Ooh, I hope we can get the same cell. Then we'll really get to bond. Can I get a "team evil?"

Bird Brain

No, please! Put me in solitary!

Dudley

Snaptrap, you're going to jail for blowing up the "Say Cheese" store.

Snaptrap

You know, it's weird. I've blown up a lot of combination cheese-and-camera shops, but I don't remember blowing up the one in Petsburg.

Actually, boss, according to your schedule, we were at the D.O.O.M. picnic the day that store was blown up.

Dudley

Wait a minute. If you didn't blow it up, then who did? [to Chameleon] Chameleon?

Chameleon

Fine! I confess! It was me! I transformed myself into Snaptrap, and framed him! There, I said it! You broke me down! Your incredible psychological tactics are impossible to resist! I hope you are satisfied.

Dudley

I was just going to ask you if you had the key to unlock these handcuffs.

Chameleon

[facepalms himself] Oh, darn it!

Dudley

Why'd you do it, Chameleon?

Chameleon

To get rid of my criminal competition. Also, I wanted a free ride to Petsburg. There's a publisher there who rejected my book. I was going to put a very lonely rattlesnake in his bed!

Snaptrap

That means I'm innocent! I get to go home.

Dudley

Not so fast! You may not have blown up the store, but you still tried to annihilate the Chameleon and me. You're going to jail!

Snaptrap

Let's not play the blame game.

Snaptrap

[as he and his friends walk in; bummed] Well, that was a rough three to five years. I wonder if this carton of milk I left on the table is still good. Drink it, Francisco! [Francisco drinks the carton of spoiled milk, making his face turn green and collapses] Let's go steal some more milk at grocery store! I'll call T.U.F.F. and tell them.

Snaptrap, don't you get it by now? We keep on getting caught 'cause you always tell T.U.F.F. our plans!

Snaptrap

[in denial] I'm sorry, Larry. I can't hear you… FROM THE SHARK TANK! [pulls the lever, opening the shark tank underneath Larry and the sharks begin mauling him] Wow, you can really tell the sharks haven't eaten in three to five years.

[climbing out; fed up and outraged] That's it! I've had enough! You're a big, stinky bully, and I quit! [walks off with purpose]

Snaptrap

Sticks and stones, Larry! Seriously, guys. Throw sticks and stones at him!

OW! My bones!

Snaptrap

I have exciting news fellas! With Larry gone, you two get to take turns in the shark tank.

[as he and Francisco look at each other and make a run for it] Wait up, Larry!

Snaptrap

[digs into his pockets] Darn it! I'm out of sticks and stones! Well, who needs those losers? I'm the only smart one around here anyway.

Kitty

Wow. Dudley is a terrible chief. Luckily, all of the city's worst villains are out of commission.

Are they in jail?

Kitty

No, they're at an evil softball tournament in Petsburgh.

Snaptrap

I stole home! Seriously, I stole it. I also swiped the ref's watch. Start the car, Larry!

Well, if all the bad guys are out there playing softball, then there's nothing to worry about.

Meerkat

It's time to give Petropolis something to worry about! [holding a meeting in a diner with Wanna-Bee, Fiddler Crab, and Escape Goat] I call to order the first meeting of the Fiendish League of Potential Perpetrators: "F.L.O.P.P.!" Role call! Meerkat, oh that's me. And I'll have you know I'm no mere cat, I'm the MEERKAT! Get it, Mere Cat. [pulls out a sign with "Mere Cat" at the top and "Meerkat" at the bottom] See the difference? You kinda have to write it down. [throws the sign away] Moving on… Wanna-Bee?

Wanna-Bee

I'm here and I wanna be bad!

Meerkat

Oooh, I like your moxie. Missing Lynx, eh missing as usual. Fiddler Crab? [Fiddler Crab plays a fiddle note on his violin but one of the strings snap and hit him in the eye] Oh, that's a snappy ditty. Escape Goat?

Escape Goat

I'm here, and I'm forming my greatest escape yet! Has anyone seen a tiny key?!

Meerkat

Time to brainstorm a fiendish plan!

Wanna-Bee

Yeah! Let's do something super bad! [falls into the creamer]

Meerkat

Oh, dear, he's fallen in the creamer! Someone throw him a swizzle stick!

Escape Goat

Here's an evil plan. Why don't we dine and dash? Ha-ha!

Meerkat

Ooh, that's super evil! Let's do it!

Snaptrap

[in Kitty's body after switching brains with him] Wow! I can get even bigger tips now!

Dudley

Hi-YAH! [punches Snaptrap in the nose, knocking him out] Take that, Snaptrap! [to Kitty] Sorry, Kitty. I think I broke your nose.

[comes out of the top secret computer room] The list is on this flash drive, Snaptrap.

Kitty

[imitating Snaptrap while in his body] Yeah. That's who I am. Snaptrap and not a girl cat in a really gross rat's body. Are there noodles in my shirt? Do all guys do this?

[tosses the flash drive in "Snaptrap's" hands] You've got your list. Now, give me my money.

Kitty

No chance, Jack. 'Cause I'm not really Snaptrap. [picks up the Brain Switcher; in normal voice] I'm Kitty Katswell!

Snaptrap

[sitting in his chair, wearing his bunny slippers and robe; bummed] Woe is me. [sighs with depression]

Oh, are you depressed, boss?

Snaptrap

Well, yes. Also, I've changed my name to "Woe."

What's wrong, Snaptrap?

Snaptrap

[shouting angrily] IT'S "WOE", LARRY!

Snaptrap

Attention T.U.F.F., soon there won't be candy for anyone.

Bird Brain

Because we're stealing it. If you leave that part out, it's confusing.

Chameleon

It was clear to me.

Bird Brain

That's because you know the plan. The T.U.F.F. agents don't!

Snaptrap

Fellas, as much as I hate you two, I think we should put out a United Front for the good guys.

Bird Brain

And I think you should be more clear when you call in a threat!

Chameleon

Oh, come on. United Front, group hug.

Snaptrap

Villains out! Stop touching me, weirdo.

Bird Brain

Oh, no! Agent Puppy's awake! I blame you two numbskulls. You haven't done anything right since we moved in together.

Snaptrap

Excuse me, but we've been carrying your booby butt since day one. The Chameleon does all the cooking, and I threaten to shoot the pool man so he wouldn't overcharge us.

Bird Brain

We do not have a pool man.

Snaptrap

Pool man, little kid looking for a lost baseball. The point is, I pull my weight!

Chameleon

Now, now. Let's not blame each other. I've got another plan to delay Agent Puppy.

Snaptrap

See? Why can't you be more like The Chameleon?

Chameleon

[hugs Snaptrap] Aww, that's sweet.

Snaptrap

Don't touch me, weirdo.