Oh, I think I landed on my pain center.
I think I landed on a rock. [turns and a rock is on the back of Patrick's head]
[gasps] Patrick, look! There's a weird thing sticking out of the ground right there.
That's just Squidward sunbathing again.
[sighs] I don't understand, Squidward. Where are all the customers? I know the Krusty Krab isn't Bikini Bottom's most prestigious eatery, but at least it's better than that salty old Chum Bucket across the street and that's our only competition.
Am I getting paid extra for this conversation?
Oh, come on, Squidward. Can't you just pretend to listen for once in your life? Do it for old Mr. Krabs.
Bye, Squidward! Bye, Mr. Krabs! [sounding flirtatious] Bye, Squidward.
You said "Bye, Squidward" twice.
[seductively] I like Squidward.
A traveling restaurant, eh? It's not fair! I had that idea years ago! No matter. If Mr. Krabs wants to play dirty, then Plankton's ready for his turn to take his turn.
Those nincompoops are better salesman than I suspected.
[The alarm goes off]
Customer approaching.
Hello, little boy. Would you like a chum burger?
BBoy
Uh, does it come in raspberry?
Um, no.
BBoy
Blueberry?
No.
BBoy
Um... raspberry?
Ah, come on, kid! You asked me that already! Now quit wasting my time!
MMable
Hey, you can't talk to my son that way! Who do you think you are?
I'm Plankton, you old hag! And your son smells like boogers!
TDTruck Driver
Hey, you can't talk about my wife that way! What do you think this is?!
I think it's time for you to lose some weight, fatty! That's what it is!
Hey, you can't talk to my grandson like that! Someone oughta put you in a mental hospital!
Someone should put you in a box floating down the river, Grandma!
...You're probably right.
You people are crazy. I'm getting out of here!
[the monster's belly is still rumbling] Anything else before we shove off?
SMSea Monster
I want dessert! [Plankton parachutes down]
We don't have desserts.
[lands from his parachute] Don't give another penny to those fast-food phonies. That's right, they stole my idea. My, my, my... [the end of the periscope breaks off, he falls down and screams as he rolls into some wet mud, hits a rock and lands next to the Sea Mosnter's foot]
SMSea Monster
[looks at Plankton] Hey, a chocolate éclair. [to audience] Now that looks like dessert to me.
No! No, no, no, no, no, no, no! You got it all wrong, see... Hey! [the Sea Monster chases Plankton through the abyss]
These quotes come from Wikiquote's SpongeBob SquarePants pages and are available under the Creative Commons Attribution-ShareAlike License.